thanksgiving
Life has been good. Senior year has been the best it could be. I am so happy with the way things are going and who I have been hanging out with. Its just sad I'm starting to realize what high school is all about when I only have a little over a half of year left.
But for some reason I can't get the thought of my family off my mind. It is very hard to live in a household where a family is so broken. Each day I wonder what it would be like if my dad didn't yell and my mom didn't cry or my brothers didn't have to be so mean. I wonder what it would be like if my dad was there for me, my mom could do what she wanted, and my brothers accomplished their goals. Each family member lacks creativity, happiness, thankfulness, and the ambition to change. From the bottom of my soul I pray that in my future I turn out nothing like my father, mother, or brothers. I percieve them all as nothing but objects to bring me down and I wish to not live the slightest same way in any possibilty like them. I am me, they are them... I want to be wild and free and set who I want to become far away from this sullen household with a thrown together family. Because of their defaults, I hope I am nothing but happy, and continue to be happy like I have been... and never ever take on the role of being the simple follower. It makes me sick to think I have the genes in me of disgrace. I am me and none other, and no one, no body, every body and anybody can never EVER bring me down.
** Do not get me wrong, I love my mom very much and my brothers too. It was mostly about the way my dad acts as a freakish creation of hate and the periodic idiocy of my brothers from time to time **
But on a lighter note... I hope all had a good thanksgiving. Be thankful for what you have... because its fact, no one else has what you do so cherish the uniqueness of your emotions, possessions, friendships, relationships, and first hand life experieneces
good night moon, another day awaits me!
But for some reason I can't get the thought of my family off my mind. It is very hard to live in a household where a family is so broken. Each day I wonder what it would be like if my dad didn't yell and my mom didn't cry or my brothers didn't have to be so mean. I wonder what it would be like if my dad was there for me, my mom could do what she wanted, and my brothers accomplished their goals. Each family member lacks creativity, happiness, thankfulness, and the ambition to change. From the bottom of my soul I pray that in my future I turn out nothing like my father, mother, or brothers. I percieve them all as nothing but objects to bring me down and I wish to not live the slightest same way in any possibilty like them. I am me, they are them... I want to be wild and free and set who I want to become far away from this sullen household with a thrown together family. Because of their defaults, I hope I am nothing but happy, and continue to be happy like I have been... and never ever take on the role of being the simple follower. It makes me sick to think I have the genes in me of disgrace. I am me and none other, and no one, no body, every body and anybody can never EVER bring me down.
** Do not get me wrong, I love my mom very much and my brothers too. It was mostly about the way my dad acts as a freakish creation of hate and the periodic idiocy of my brothers from time to time **
But on a lighter note... I hope all had a good thanksgiving. Be thankful for what you have... because its fact, no one else has what you do so cherish the uniqueness of your emotions, possessions, friendships, relationships, and first hand life experieneces
good night moon, another day awaits me!