(no subject)
heyyyy, back again after a random ammount of time with about a billion and one things to post.. new years resolution- get better at posting in a timely manner.. even though no one reads it anyway... interesting.
okay, so theres ALOT going on, big surprise? no, i didnt think so either.. heres the nutshell--
-we came very close to loosing our house, yayyy foreclosure- or not.. but aparently patti had put my dad in her will, so we got a good chunk of money from her, that couldnt have come at a better time. (not to sound in anyway disrespectful!) my dad was like a son to her, i know it meant alot to him. and it definetly reassured me that theres some kind of plan, or someone/something really is there, at least trying to give us a leg up.
-my dad finally got to see a spinal specialst in boston, and we found out that he never should have gone back to work, and most definetly shouldnt have been going to physical therapy. awesome. he got this erector set style back brace he has to wear constantly, for the next two months. then he gets re-evaluated, and we see where we're at. we go next week to get steroid injections into his spinal column, that should be fun! poor guy.
- the sate is aparently suing tiffany for child support for liam, because my brother gets help for him through the state.. see, tiffany hasnt had a known address since before we even had custody of liam.. but now she according to the sate, she has an east bridgewater address... awesome! i dont know how to take that in just yet.. but im ALOT more hesitant to let liam outside to play by himself. definetly freaks me out.
now, the new and main situation at hand.. i spent new years eve with matt, he invited me to a party at his friend dylan's. nicole was doing something with keith and i really didnt feel like being the 9th wheel at jess's, so i was like, yeah def. then i made the stupid stupid stupid mistake of telling nicole i was having some thoughts about him again.. and once you admit stuff like that, its all over. so now im freaking out about the whole event and nervous as all get out- stupid, i mean, its just matt we've been friends for years, big deal. the party was fun, i met some really interesting people, and played some serious rock band haha. but matt never really spent much time around me- not really a huge deal, i was getting along fine with everyone. he went out with dylan to do a liquor store run -which is weird, cause hes edge- and called me saying he had to go pick up his friend eric, and wanted to know if i was cool with that, or if i wanted him to pick me up first,.. i said, no big deal, i can hold my own. then he texts me apologizing, saying he feels like a jerk, kind of sweet.. he didnt want me to be all uncomfortable and such. but then he spent most of the night in the other room, i hardly even talked to him all night, just kinda strange. i kinda felt like he was avoiding me.. even though he invited me.. the whole night dylan kept talling me i should kiss matt at midnight.. and im like.. what? not knowing how to respond to that.. awkward! midnight comes around, and matts nowhere to be seen, not that i think i wouldve anyway, not with a room full of people i dont even know. hes off in the other room, and everyone else has left, so im talking to eric and dylan and allison, whatever.. allison goes in to talk to matt, then she comes out and dylan and eric go in to talk to him.. obviously something is bothering him, and its weirding me out taht hes not talking to me.. then allsion asks me if i would ever get back together with him, and i just kind of give her this look, cause again- not expecting it.. and shes like, he didnt tell me ask or anything.. so i said, yeah, probably. i didnt know what else to say haha. so were leaving and were giving eric a ride home cracking jokes and stuff, no big deal like nothing was everweird or wrong or whatever. we drop off eric and hes driving me home and everythings totally normal again, except when he pulls into my driveway and i start geeking out again.. so i fumble for my keys and then say " ok, well.. see ya" how stupid is that?!?! i even stopped halfway to my door tellibng myself i should just turn around and go kiss him. but i dont. so im in my house and i text him saying that i want him to text me when he gets home so i know he made it okay, and then i tell him how i was kicking myself for not kissing him, and maybe i shouldnt have said that, and hell probably never talk to me again.. an excrutiating 20 minutes later he texts me back saying, "really? cause i kinda am too.. " and then " im not gonna stop talking to you, i wont make that mistake again" which is really cute and im like elated... then nothing.. its back to regualr texts and being silly, but nothing about my confession or anything, i dont know whats gonna happen, hell i dont know what i want to happen.. im soooo confused right now, theres about a thousand thoughts in my head, pros and cons, and i know im just being completly rediculous, but i cant help it! auuughhh
okay, so theres ALOT going on, big surprise? no, i didnt think so either.. heres the nutshell--
-we came very close to loosing our house, yayyy foreclosure- or not.. but aparently patti had put my dad in her will, so we got a good chunk of money from her, that couldnt have come at a better time. (not to sound in anyway disrespectful!) my dad was like a son to her, i know it meant alot to him. and it definetly reassured me that theres some kind of plan, or someone/something really is there, at least trying to give us a leg up.
-my dad finally got to see a spinal specialst in boston, and we found out that he never should have gone back to work, and most definetly shouldnt have been going to physical therapy. awesome. he got this erector set style back brace he has to wear constantly, for the next two months. then he gets re-evaluated, and we see where we're at. we go next week to get steroid injections into his spinal column, that should be fun! poor guy.
- the sate is aparently suing tiffany for child support for liam, because my brother gets help for him through the state.. see, tiffany hasnt had a known address since before we even had custody of liam.. but now she according to the sate, she has an east bridgewater address... awesome! i dont know how to take that in just yet.. but im ALOT more hesitant to let liam outside to play by himself. definetly freaks me out.
now, the new and main situation at hand.. i spent new years eve with matt, he invited me to a party at his friend dylan's. nicole was doing something with keith and i really didnt feel like being the 9th wheel at jess's, so i was like, yeah def. then i made the stupid stupid stupid mistake of telling nicole i was having some thoughts about him again.. and once you admit stuff like that, its all over. so now im freaking out about the whole event and nervous as all get out- stupid, i mean, its just matt we've been friends for years, big deal. the party was fun, i met some really interesting people, and played some serious rock band haha. but matt never really spent much time around me- not really a huge deal, i was getting along fine with everyone. he went out with dylan to do a liquor store run -which is weird, cause hes edge- and called me saying he had to go pick up his friend eric, and wanted to know if i was cool with that, or if i wanted him to pick me up first,.. i said, no big deal, i can hold my own. then he texts me apologizing, saying he feels like a jerk, kind of sweet.. he didnt want me to be all uncomfortable and such. but then he spent most of the night in the other room, i hardly even talked to him all night, just kinda strange. i kinda felt like he was avoiding me.. even though he invited me.. the whole night dylan kept talling me i should kiss matt at midnight.. and im like.. what? not knowing how to respond to that.. awkward! midnight comes around, and matts nowhere to be seen, not that i think i wouldve anyway, not with a room full of people i dont even know. hes off in the other room, and everyone else has left, so im talking to eric and dylan and allison, whatever.. allison goes in to talk to matt, then she comes out and dylan and eric go in to talk to him.. obviously something is bothering him, and its weirding me out taht hes not talking to me.. then allsion asks me if i would ever get back together with him, and i just kind of give her this look, cause again- not expecting it.. and shes like, he didnt tell me ask or anything.. so i said, yeah, probably. i didnt know what else to say haha. so were leaving and were giving eric a ride home cracking jokes and stuff, no big deal like nothing was everweird or wrong or whatever. we drop off eric and hes driving me home and everythings totally normal again, except when he pulls into my driveway and i start geeking out again.. so i fumble for my keys and then say " ok, well.. see ya" how stupid is that?!?! i even stopped halfway to my door tellibng myself i should just turn around and go kiss him. but i dont. so im in my house and i text him saying that i want him to text me when he gets home so i know he made it okay, and then i tell him how i was kicking myself for not kissing him, and maybe i shouldnt have said that, and hell probably never talk to me again.. an excrutiating 20 minutes later he texts me back saying, "really? cause i kinda am too.. " and then " im not gonna stop talking to you, i wont make that mistake again" which is really cute and im like elated... then nothing.. its back to regualr texts and being silly, but nothing about my confession or anything, i dont know whats gonna happen, hell i dont know what i want to happen.. im soooo confused right now, theres about a thousand thoughts in my head, pros and cons, and i know im just being completly rediculous, but i cant help it! auuughhh