Make Tonight Last
Title: Make Tonight Last
Rating: NC-17
Pairing(s)/Character(s): Kurt/Blaine. Background Finn/Rachel and Burt/Carole.
Warning(s): Vague sex.
Note: Part of the Where is My Boy? universe. Takes place during the time frame of Our Days are Numbered, but you don’t need to read that to understand this piece.
Summary: Right before he leaves for New York, Kurt has the house to himself and decides not to waste the opportunity.
It’s July 16th and Kurt is exhausted.
In the last few days, he’s worked 26 hours, sweating in his coveralls and ending the day covered in grease. He doesn’t complain though, because he needs the money for next year and it’s so satisfying to make the summer hires jaws drop. (They’re mostly college guys, big and burly and totally stunned when Kurt replaces an entire transmission while belting Adele, not missing a note.)
Still, it’s Monday morning and Kurt hasn’t seen anyone outside of his family or the guys at the shop since Thursday night. Beyond work, he’s been slowly packing up his room for the better part of two weeks. Going through his closet took a day and a half, because there's only so much space in the New York apartment, meaning Kurt needs maximum wearabilty and fashion sense in what he uses.
Last night, for example, he was up until two in the morning going through his scarf collection while, over Skype, Blaine read out loud from the latest issue of Cosmo. That's the main reason why he slept in until ten and is still in his pajamas at the breakfast table, staring down a bowl of cornflakes when Finn stumbles in and immediately attacks the coffee that's brewing.
Carole smiles wryly at them both from where she's adding dates to the calendar. "Up all night having fun, you two?"
Kurt shoots her a half-hearted glare, because his step mom knows that they didn't. She'd been the one to tsk and send Kurt to bed when she got home from her shift at the hospital. Blinking blearily, Finn ignores the question and asks, "Did you put down the party on Thursday? I don't want to forget it."
Holding up the calendar, Carole assures her son that it's there. Kurt and Rachel leave for New York next Monday, but their going away party will be on Thursday. However, on Saturday, there's a note that says Overnight in Columbus. Kurt raises an eyebrow and asks what that means.
“Your dad has meetings all morning and afternoon in the Capitol. Since I have the day off, we’re going to make it into an overnight date,” Carole says, winking in a way that makes Finn gag, “We’ll get back before noon on Sunday, but we figured that you two can handle yourselves for a night.”
Kurt exchanges a look with Finn, because there’s no way they’re going to miss this opportunity.
~~~
To: Blaine<3
Do you have plans for after work on Saturday?
From: Blaine<3
no. should i???
To: Blaine<3
Well, my dad and Carole will be in Columbus. Finn managed to convince our parents that he would be fine spending the night at Rachel's. I'll have this big house all to myself starting at 4 p.m.
From: Blaine<3
are you seducing me?;)
To: Blaine<3
As if I'd need to. XP
From: Blaine<3
is that a jibe at my virtue?
To: Blaine<3
Your virtue is nonexistent. Can you come or not?
From: Blaine<3
i'll be there, but i'll be on my very best behavior. THEN we’ll see who the virtuous one is!
To: Blaine<3
Now who's seducing who? ;)
~~~
In his mind, Kurt had imagined a romantic dinner planned: a mix of their favorite foods for the entree and sides, with a sweet dessert that they could feed each other. Strawberries, maybe, or little pastries. They would eat outside, watching the sun set and the fireflies appear before slipping inside for a more private celebration of the evening.
Except then the going away party was on Thursday and Kurt had to help cook for it. The first half of Friday was spent cleaning up after said party and the second half was used to finish packing and mailing out the rest of his things. By Saturday, he's drained physically and emotionally. So, when Blaine shows up, Kurt collapses into his arms and mumbles out an apology.
"I swear, I had all these plans," he says into Blaine's neck, "Would ordering pizza be so terrible?"
"Nothing about tonight could be terrible," Blaine says seriously as he runs a hand through Kurt's hair, "Except not getting it pie cut. That would be a tragedy."
Kurt laughs and leans in to kiss to finally kiss Blaine hello. Whenever Blaine says something so perfect for the moment, Kurt feels himself fall in love a little bit more. Because here is a boy who can make him laugh so easily and knows when to say nothing because Kurt needs to be loud. And he loves Kurt back, which is just the icing on the cake.
So, they get a pizza with green peppers and mushrooms and extra cheese (pie cut, naturally). They're each about three slices in, sitting not close enough to touch on the couch, but that's okay with Kurt, because both his and Blaine's hands are coated in grease. They put the TV onto a random channel when the food arrived and now they're two episodes into a Friends marathon.
"I always wished that Joey and Rachel had stayed together," Kurt says, shaking his head at the TV, "The way she and Ross were always on-again, off-again wasn't healthy."
"Totally but I always like Monica and Chandler the best, because once they were together, they were in it for the long haul."
Kurt side eyes his boyfriend, because Blaine still has his eyes glued to the show and another slice of pizza halfway through his mouth. Last year, somewhere between Christmas and Valentine's Day, Kurt had explained to Mercedes and Tina how they were destined to be together using the Monica/Chandler relationship as a metaphor. He has no intentions of ever letting Blaine find this out, but he still feels giddy because his boyfriend is, in a roundabout way, saying they're the best.
"I love you," Kurt says, resting his head on Blaine's shoulder.
Blaine's full mouth keeps him from saying it back, but that's fine with Kurt. He knows that Blaine loves him back in a way that is bone deep and instinctive. And he doesn't believe in soul mates just like he doesn't believe in god, but when Blaine presses a soft, albeit greasy kiss to the crown of Kurt's forehead, soul mates is still a silly word but he can see its merit.
"I can't wait until this is us again," Blaine says.
Kurt was pulling away to grab his drink off the table, but he stops in order to stare. Blaine looks down at the food on his plate, but clearly isn’t focusing on it. It seems like he's a million years away and the way he frowns makes Kurt touch his knee, like it will anchor Blaine back to the present.
Blaine looks up, still far away but smiling now. And Kurt will never, ever get sick of that smile and the way it makes Blaine's nose crinkle and how good it feels to be the cause of it. He puts a hand over Kurt's and squeezes.
"This is what I want for us next year. Eating carry out and watching whatever we want on the couch. Our New York couch."
Kurt has one of those falling in love all over moments again, thinking how are you so perfect and mine at the same time. The only thing he can do then is kiss Blaine and it feels a little like toasting to the future.
~~~
They wind up talking about everything they've both been worrying about.
Blaine isn't sure if he wants to stay at McKinley or try going back to Dalton and his parents have started hounding him about his non-existent career plans. Kurt is afraid of going to New York and realizing that he's not actually a shining star or that his voice and looks will cost him everything in performances. The distance and time scares the shit out of both of them, because they love each other so much and anything else simply isn't an option at this point.
"What if I go back to how I was before I met you?" Kurt asks, eyes downcast and mouth pulled into a tight line.
He handled things quietly before, shoving his hurt aside because that's just how things were. That meant anger tears over the countless pieces of clothing ruined by slushies or dumpsters, then smiling and reassuring things that he was okay. Kurt had clung fiercely to the belief that things would eventually get better when he left Ohio and, until then, he had to stick it out.
Except, Blaine came and ruined it all. For the first time in his life, Kurt had a friend that understood the unique way his life sucked. They bitched about homophobes together and went to musicals apologetically, leaning on each other and realizing that it was okay for them to be angry when the world gave them raw deal.
And frankly, after two years of building up confidence and facing their demons together, Kurt is terrified that without Blaine's support, he'll turn back into a scared sixteen year old who never speaks up.
He tells Blaine this in a rush, feeling ready to throw up by the time he's done. And Blaine just looks at Kurt with his eyes watering a little, gently cupping his boyfriend's cheek.
"When I met you, I thought you were the bravest kid in Ohio," Blaine says, voice soft but earnest, "Now, I know you're the bravest person on this whole planet. And even though none of that is because of me, I'll never be farther than a phone call or plane ride away."
"Blaine, you can't just jump on a plane whenever I want you to."
"Then, I'll only do it when I want to, so expect me every few days."
Both of them know that visits on a whim aren't possible, but that just makes the idea better. Kurt shuts his eyes and imagines coming home from classes only to find Blaine passed out on the sofa in the shoebox of the apartment he and Rachel will be sharing. Because his boyfriend is a light sleeper, Kurt would be able to kiss Blaine awake without feeling creepy.
"What are you thinking about now?" Blaine asks, voice low and pleasant.
"You," Kurt says honestly.
Opening his eyes, Kurt inhales sharply. Blaine is doing that thing where he looks at Kurt with hearts in his impossible brown eyes. Like there is nothing in the world that can compare to his boyfriend's existence. It's a look that makes Kurt feel invincible to the world and completely vulnerable to Blaine.
"Yours are the sweetest eyes that I have ever seen," Kurt sings, unable to find a better way to say what he's feeling.
And Blaine, who understands that it's infinitely easier to deal with emotions when they're set to music, looks touched.
They're kissing after that, sweet and slow like they haven't had time for in months because of how stupidly busy this summer has been and how none of their friends want to leave them alone. Kurt slips his hand easily past the hem of Blaine's shirt, palm pressed into the dip of his boyfriend's back. The skin there is warm, but it's nothing compared to how hot Blaine's mouth feels against Kurt's neck.
"Missed this," Kurt sighs happily, twisting so he can pepper kisses across the crown of Blaine's head, "Missed this so much."
Blaine pulls away to smile at him. His eyes are so dark right now, all blown pupils peeking up from under his long eyelashes. He's so sinfully gorgeous like this, but Kurt has never worried about damnation before. He leans in to kiss Blaine again, because there's no reason for them not to be kissing. Blaine stops him though, pushing gently on Kurt's chest and keeping his hand above the spot where Kurt's heart pounds against his ribcage.
"I want to do something for you," Blaine says, voice liquid honey.
He slides his hand slowly downwards and Kurt has to take a deep breath, because Blaine is palming him through his jeans and Kurt is getting hard underneath his touch. He can feel his face getting hot, hating and loving it all at once. By now, Kurt feels like he should be used to Blaine touching him without embarrassment but can't.
Still, Kurt's able to push that thought away when Blaine unzips his fly. He rubs a thumb over the head of Kurt's cock and Kurt does something halfway between a gasp and a moan. Blaine laughs, a low rumble, and presses a kiss to Kurt's throat. "I love that sound."
As he trails kisses across Kurt's neck and collarbone, Blaine stops palming Kurt in order to tug at his jeans. Obediently, Kurt raises his hips and Blaine shimmies backwards until the pants are gone. Never in his life has Kurt seen someone look so ridiculous and sexy at the same time. Blaine chases that thought away when he drops a kiss in the bend of Kurt's knee and gets swatted on the shoulder for his trouble.
"That tickles," Kurt says, tracing Blaine's jaw with his thumb.
Blaine grins and moves so his face is firmed by Kurt's thighs. His hands rest at Kurt's hips, warm and steady as his thumbs dig in to the jut of bone. Kurt wishes he had a camera right now, because the sight of Blaine settled so contentedly against his body should be preserved forever.
"Shall we skip to the main event?" Blaine asks, breath warm on Kurt's thighs and one finger crooked into the waistband of his underwear.
Kurt's eyes fly open at that and he scrambles back, leaving Blaine to look hurt and squeeze his knee, gently. "Kurt, did I do something wrong?"
Kurt shakes his head furiously. "No. We just can't do that on my family's couch."
"I see," is all Blaine says, sounding incredulous until a little laugh bubbles out of him.
Then, the two of them giggle and kiss as they make their way up the stairs and into Kurt's room. They hurry through getting undressed and, since he was halfway there already, Kurt is more than glad to help Blaine.
"Any qualms about me blowing you here?" Blaine asks, cheeky, "Or do we need to change locations again?"
Kurt rolls his eyes and pouts at that, but then they're on the bed and kissing and his pretend annoyance at Blaine melts away. They take their time here, touching and teasing in ways that is rarely afforded to them. It's not like the sex they normally have; frantic and hushed, because there's always time and the chance of people walking in to worry about.
This is Blaine slowing dragging his mouth over the planes and angles of Kurt's body. This is Kurt moaning loudly when Blaine sinks down and swallows him, then chants Blaine's name rapturously until he's coming.
It's then, with his hands buried in Blaine's hair and his boyfriend's stubbled cheek resting against the oversensitive skin of his thigh that Kurt understands why so many people refer to sex as 'making love'.
~~~
Feeling boneless, Kurt drags himself to the shower, where the water is already the perfect temperature. Blaine is already waiting inside, naked. His hair is a mess, gel melting and molding to his head like a helmet. Stepping into the shower, Kurt smiles fondly and orders, "Turn around."
Blaine doesn't hesitate, even though this is the first time they've done this. Wasting no time, Kurt pumps a handful of curl safe shampoo (purchased especially for when Blaine spends the night) into his hands and starts to wash his boyfriend's hair.
In all honesty, it's a little weird to wash someone else's hair, but Kurt likes the way Blaine's hair feels in his hands and how close together they have to stand. Blaine likes it too, if the way he sighs contentedly and leans into Kurt's touch is anything to go by.
"If you ever get sick of Broadway, you could make a fortune in scalp massages."
Kurt goes mmhmm unenthusiastically and drops a kiss on Blaine's shoulder. Licking his lips afterwards, he likes the unmistakable taste of skin underneath that of water and the faint taste of soap. Grinning lazily, Kurt says, "Step forward and turn around. You need to rinse."
Blaine makes a small noise of protest, but still obeys. Immediately, Kurt's eyes drift to how hard his boyfriend is. It makes fire spread in his belly and, feeling bold and just a little bit like a porn star, Kurt reaches forward to grab Blaine's dick.
"If shampooing gets you this excited, I'd hate to see what happens after a deep conditioning."
Never mind the fact that Kurt himself has been half-hard since stepping into the shower, it's fun to tease his boyfriend as he circles the tip of Blaine's cock with his thumb. Blaine's eyes slide shut and he lets out a groan.
"We did other stuff. And you're really, really hot."
Kurt feels himself blush, which makes him feel stupid since he's already in the process of getting his boyfriend off in the shower, so one little comment shouldn't make him feel embarrassed. Pushing the thought away, he presses Blaine against the shower wall in order to kiss him.
It's all teeth and tongue for a minute, water making everything slick but Kurt's brain doesn't ever let him just enjoy things like this, because he's realizing that the lube he has is water based and that makes him worry about friction. Pulling away from the kiss and touching Blaine's hipbone gently, Kurt asks, "Is this okay?"
And Blaine looks like he might kill Kurt then and there, but then he lets out a breathy a laugh and nips Kurt on the ear. "It's more than okay. Just keep going."
Kurt nods and begins pumping his hand faster as Blaine bites on his bottom lip and then sucks softly to sooth it. The kiss is messy and hot and ends too soon, because when Blaine starts to come, he breaks away to whisper Kurt's name over and over into the expanse of his boyfriend neck.
The nice thing about shower sex, Kurt thinks as he holds up a panting Blaine, is that the mess takes care of itself. Feeling even better than he did when Blaine had got him off, Kurt wishes that they could stay under the water forever. But, eventually, the water starts to cool down and Kurt kisses his boyfriend on the jaw.
"C'mon, we have about ten seconds before it turns to ice in here."
"You didn't get to wash your hair," says Blaine, sounding torn between guilt and horror.
"I did get to make someone I love feel good though. My hair can suffer for one day."
Blaine laughs and the way it sounds reverberating in the shower is so beautiful that Kurt can't do anything but kiss him until the water starts raising goosebumps in uncomfortable places. They stumble out still clinging to each other but are suddenly, stupidly shy.
As he turns off the water and hastily wraps a towel around his hips, Kurt wonders why there seems to be such a huge difference between in the shower naked and out of the shower naked.
"Thank you," Blaine says, pressing a kiss to Kurt's cheek, "That was amazing. And not just because, y'know, shower sex."
Kurt nods, because it was nice to be so close under the spray of the the water and not having to worry about things like clothes or cleaning up right away. As he starts his post-shower exfoliation and moisturizing routine, Kurt points out, "This could easily become a regular thing when you visit me in New York, if you liked."
Blaine's eyes go wide and his ears turn red, but even as he towels his hair dry, there's a grin on his face and an unmistakable glow in his eyes.
"I'd like that a lot, actually."
~~~
"Kurt," Blaine whispers, "I'm hungry again."
Curled up against Blaine's back, Kurt feels warm and content as he mumbles into the crook of his boyfriend's neck. "Do something about it then. You know where the kitchen is."
Blaine rolls around so he can pout properly at his boyfriend. Kurt presses a kiss to his nose, then gets out of bed. They sneak downstairs, tip toeing and shushing each other, even though they have the house to themselves, for the sake of fun.
As Blaine scoops them out a ridiculously big bowl of ice cream to share, Kurt sits on the counter and swings his legs. He feels like he's eight instead of eighteen. Blaine looks it though, having traded his contacts for glasses and wearing a threadbare pair of pajama pants with a batman tee shirt. Pajamas are, by far, Kurt's favorite thing to see Blaine in, because their sleepover opportunities are few and far between.
"You're looking at me weird," Blaine informs Kurt, offering a spoonful of ice cream.
Taking the spoon graciously, Kurt just smiles and waves a hand instead of answering. Blaine smiles back with a little roll of the eyes and goes for a second spoon.
"There's no need to make more dishes," Kurt says, which only makes Blaine laugh.
"Are you going to feed me then?"
"Lazy," Kurt chides, but still holds out a spoonful of ice cream.
They take turns feeding each other and kissing in between spoonfuls. Kurt likes licking the inside of Blaine's mouth only to be met with a sweet chill and if his boyfriend has any complaints about it, he isn't voicing them. In fact, the only thing Blaine uses his voice for is singing bits of songs under his breath. Kurt recognizes each piece from the mix tape that Blaine had given him at the party on Thursday.
“I’ve been playing that song nonstop since I first heard it,” Kurt says, frowning slightly at the empty bowl of ice cream.
Blaine smiles, absentmindedly presses a kiss to Kurt’s fingertips. “Then you should sing with me.”
For a minute, Kurt thinks about protesting, because he hasn't done vocal warm ups in a week and his throat feels all weird and dairy-coated. Except, Blaine keeps smiling at him, sleepy-eyed but still excited, humming the opening bars of the first song on the mix tape.
How, Kurt wonders as he hops off the counter so he can dance with Blaine, is anyone supposed to say no to someone so adorable?
~~~
They're curled up on the couch again, watching the first film of Svenboolie's Saturday Night Double Creature Feature. It was Blaine's pick and, as unimpressed as he is with The Birds, Kurt sighs contentedly as Blaine absentmindedly draws patterns on his palm.
"This is what I'll miss the most," Blaine confesses, so quiet that Kurt barely hears him, "Just sitting with you even if we're not doing anything special. Being able to remind myself that you do exist and I'm not dreaming."
Kurt's heart somersaults in his chest, making him feel nauseous and touched all at one. He kisses Blaine's cheek, then drags his mouth along Blaine's jaw until he's softly breathing into his boyfriend's ear. Blaine shivers under him and Kurt loves it.
"Who said it's not special whenever we're together?" Kurt whispers.
Blaine shivers again and shifts so Kurt's chin is on his chest rather than his should. He's a shade of pink that delights Kurt and smiling softly when he says, "We have had some spectacular times. Remember when we first met?"
Kurt scoffs, because does Blaine honestly think he'd forget? Besides, he loves to tease Blaine about stealing lost boys away and serenading them with Katy Perry. Still, the memory makes Kurt grin and he gives his boyfriend a little push so they're lying down.
Kurt is on top of Blaine, but they're limbs are so tangled with each other and the blankets that it doesn't matter. Stretching luxuriously, Kurt kisses Blaine on the nose and says, "Dalton was fun, but we can't snub the Lima Bean. It's been essential to the growth of our relationship."
"Yeah," Blaine agrees, sounding dazed, "When I first told you I loved you there, I kept thinking that I should of been nervous or planned something big. It just kinda slipped out."
"I'm glad that it did, because I am so ridiculously in love with you."
They're quiet for a long time, Blaine running a hand through Kurt's hair, stopping occasionally to scratch at the base of his boyfriend's scalp. Kurt relaxes into the touch, soaking up the warmth radiating from Blaine's body and giving the movie a second chance.
At the commercial break, Blaine's hand stills and Kurt assumes that he's asleep. Which is fine, because the exhaustion from the week is creeping back into his bones. Shutting his eyes, Kurt is ready for sleep when Blaine speaks up again.
"Kurt, if something happens to us-"
"Nothing is going to happen," Kurt says, suddenly awake, "We're solid."
Blaine ignores him. "If something happens, I'll always be glad of all the places we have. Like the Dalton common room or the Lima Bean, because then I have permanent reminders about how much we loved each other."
They both start rattling of things that are undeniably theirs then. Singing a duet at Regionals. Movie marathons in the common rooms at Dalton. Spending the opening night of West Side Story together. The day at the lake over the summer, when everyone else went to town and they were finally, gloriously alone.
On the TV, the group drives into the sunrise through the flocks of birds. The ambiguous ending hits a little too close to home right now and Kurt clutches Blaine's shirt more tightly than necessary. He's thinking about how Blaine is right about the quiet moments being the ones that you miss the most, because they can seem so small compared to the grand gestures and milestones. They're too easy to forget.
Quietly, Kurt says, "Even though I already miss you and the few good spots of this stupid town, I'm really excited for New York."
The thought has been haunting Kurt since he got his NYADA acceptance letter. Once New York became real, he tried to be careful whenever he even thought of it. That meant emotional whiplash as he went from excitement to finally getting out of Ohio to guilt, because it's been his home all his life. Now that he's finally admitted it, Kurt feels relief flood him.
He's imagined Blaine reacting to this a thousand times, late at night when he played the scene over and over in his head. But he imagination was never good enough for what reality offers: Blaine smiling sadly and hugging Kurt tightly. His voice is wavering, but he still reassures Kurt that he's okay with it.
"Besides, it's not like we won't have Christmas or spring break or the rest of our lives together."
Kurt seriously can't believe how in love he is right now. And how in love he'll be at Christmas and spring break and however long Blaine is at his side. As he kisses Blaine, steady and sure, Kurt thinks, We'll always have tonight, too.
Rating: NC-17
Pairing(s)/Character(s): Kurt/Blaine. Background Finn/Rachel and Burt/Carole.
Warning(s): Vague sex.
Note: Part of the Where is My Boy? universe. Takes place during the time frame of Our Days are Numbered, but you don’t need to read that to understand this piece.
Summary: Right before he leaves for New York, Kurt has the house to himself and decides not to waste the opportunity.
It’s July 16th and Kurt is exhausted.
In the last few days, he’s worked 26 hours, sweating in his coveralls and ending the day covered in grease. He doesn’t complain though, because he needs the money for next year and it’s so satisfying to make the summer hires jaws drop. (They’re mostly college guys, big and burly and totally stunned when Kurt replaces an entire transmission while belting Adele, not missing a note.)
Still, it’s Monday morning and Kurt hasn’t seen anyone outside of his family or the guys at the shop since Thursday night. Beyond work, he’s been slowly packing up his room for the better part of two weeks. Going through his closet took a day and a half, because there's only so much space in the New York apartment, meaning Kurt needs maximum wearabilty and fashion sense in what he uses.
Last night, for example, he was up until two in the morning going through his scarf collection while, over Skype, Blaine read out loud from the latest issue of Cosmo. That's the main reason why he slept in until ten and is still in his pajamas at the breakfast table, staring down a bowl of cornflakes when Finn stumbles in and immediately attacks the coffee that's brewing.
Carole smiles wryly at them both from where she's adding dates to the calendar. "Up all night having fun, you two?"
Kurt shoots her a half-hearted glare, because his step mom knows that they didn't. She'd been the one to tsk and send Kurt to bed when she got home from her shift at the hospital. Blinking blearily, Finn ignores the question and asks, "Did you put down the party on Thursday? I don't want to forget it."
Holding up the calendar, Carole assures her son that it's there. Kurt and Rachel leave for New York next Monday, but their going away party will be on Thursday. However, on Saturday, there's a note that says Overnight in Columbus. Kurt raises an eyebrow and asks what that means.
“Your dad has meetings all morning and afternoon in the Capitol. Since I have the day off, we’re going to make it into an overnight date,” Carole says, winking in a way that makes Finn gag, “We’ll get back before noon on Sunday, but we figured that you two can handle yourselves for a night.”
Kurt exchanges a look with Finn, because there’s no way they’re going to miss this opportunity.
~~~
To: Blaine<3
Do you have plans for after work on Saturday?
From: Blaine<3
no. should i???
To: Blaine<3
Well, my dad and Carole will be in Columbus. Finn managed to convince our parents that he would be fine spending the night at Rachel's. I'll have this big house all to myself starting at 4 p.m.
From: Blaine<3
are you seducing me?;)
To: Blaine<3
As if I'd need to. XP
From: Blaine<3
is that a jibe at my virtue?
To: Blaine<3
Your virtue is nonexistent. Can you come or not?
From: Blaine<3
i'll be there, but i'll be on my very best behavior. THEN we’ll see who the virtuous one is!
To: Blaine<3
Now who's seducing who? ;)
~~~
In his mind, Kurt had imagined a romantic dinner planned: a mix of their favorite foods for the entree and sides, with a sweet dessert that they could feed each other. Strawberries, maybe, or little pastries. They would eat outside, watching the sun set and the fireflies appear before slipping inside for a more private celebration of the evening.
Except then the going away party was on Thursday and Kurt had to help cook for it. The first half of Friday was spent cleaning up after said party and the second half was used to finish packing and mailing out the rest of his things. By Saturday, he's drained physically and emotionally. So, when Blaine shows up, Kurt collapses into his arms and mumbles out an apology.
"I swear, I had all these plans," he says into Blaine's neck, "Would ordering pizza be so terrible?"
"Nothing about tonight could be terrible," Blaine says seriously as he runs a hand through Kurt's hair, "Except not getting it pie cut. That would be a tragedy."
Kurt laughs and leans in to kiss to finally kiss Blaine hello. Whenever Blaine says something so perfect for the moment, Kurt feels himself fall in love a little bit more. Because here is a boy who can make him laugh so easily and knows when to say nothing because Kurt needs to be loud. And he loves Kurt back, which is just the icing on the cake.
So, they get a pizza with green peppers and mushrooms and extra cheese (pie cut, naturally). They're each about three slices in, sitting not close enough to touch on the couch, but that's okay with Kurt, because both his and Blaine's hands are coated in grease. They put the TV onto a random channel when the food arrived and now they're two episodes into a Friends marathon.
"I always wished that Joey and Rachel had stayed together," Kurt says, shaking his head at the TV, "The way she and Ross were always on-again, off-again wasn't healthy."
"Totally but I always like Monica and Chandler the best, because once they were together, they were in it for the long haul."
Kurt side eyes his boyfriend, because Blaine still has his eyes glued to the show and another slice of pizza halfway through his mouth. Last year, somewhere between Christmas and Valentine's Day, Kurt had explained to Mercedes and Tina how they were destined to be together using the Monica/Chandler relationship as a metaphor. He has no intentions of ever letting Blaine find this out, but he still feels giddy because his boyfriend is, in a roundabout way, saying they're the best.
"I love you," Kurt says, resting his head on Blaine's shoulder.
Blaine's full mouth keeps him from saying it back, but that's fine with Kurt. He knows that Blaine loves him back in a way that is bone deep and instinctive. And he doesn't believe in soul mates just like he doesn't believe in god, but when Blaine presses a soft, albeit greasy kiss to the crown of Kurt's forehead, soul mates is still a silly word but he can see its merit.
"I can't wait until this is us again," Blaine says.
Kurt was pulling away to grab his drink off the table, but he stops in order to stare. Blaine looks down at the food on his plate, but clearly isn’t focusing on it. It seems like he's a million years away and the way he frowns makes Kurt touch his knee, like it will anchor Blaine back to the present.
Blaine looks up, still far away but smiling now. And Kurt will never, ever get sick of that smile and the way it makes Blaine's nose crinkle and how good it feels to be the cause of it. He puts a hand over Kurt's and squeezes.
"This is what I want for us next year. Eating carry out and watching whatever we want on the couch. Our New York couch."
Kurt has one of those falling in love all over moments again, thinking how are you so perfect and mine at the same time. The only thing he can do then is kiss Blaine and it feels a little like toasting to the future.
~~~
They wind up talking about everything they've both been worrying about.
Blaine isn't sure if he wants to stay at McKinley or try going back to Dalton and his parents have started hounding him about his non-existent career plans. Kurt is afraid of going to New York and realizing that he's not actually a shining star or that his voice and looks will cost him everything in performances. The distance and time scares the shit out of both of them, because they love each other so much and anything else simply isn't an option at this point.
"What if I go back to how I was before I met you?" Kurt asks, eyes downcast and mouth pulled into a tight line.
He handled things quietly before, shoving his hurt aside because that's just how things were. That meant anger tears over the countless pieces of clothing ruined by slushies or dumpsters, then smiling and reassuring things that he was okay. Kurt had clung fiercely to the belief that things would eventually get better when he left Ohio and, until then, he had to stick it out.
Except, Blaine came and ruined it all. For the first time in his life, Kurt had a friend that understood the unique way his life sucked. They bitched about homophobes together and went to musicals apologetically, leaning on each other and realizing that it was okay for them to be angry when the world gave them raw deal.
And frankly, after two years of building up confidence and facing their demons together, Kurt is terrified that without Blaine's support, he'll turn back into a scared sixteen year old who never speaks up.
He tells Blaine this in a rush, feeling ready to throw up by the time he's done. And Blaine just looks at Kurt with his eyes watering a little, gently cupping his boyfriend's cheek.
"When I met you, I thought you were the bravest kid in Ohio," Blaine says, voice soft but earnest, "Now, I know you're the bravest person on this whole planet. And even though none of that is because of me, I'll never be farther than a phone call or plane ride away."
"Blaine, you can't just jump on a plane whenever I want you to."
"Then, I'll only do it when I want to, so expect me every few days."
Both of them know that visits on a whim aren't possible, but that just makes the idea better. Kurt shuts his eyes and imagines coming home from classes only to find Blaine passed out on the sofa in the shoebox of the apartment he and Rachel will be sharing. Because his boyfriend is a light sleeper, Kurt would be able to kiss Blaine awake without feeling creepy.
"What are you thinking about now?" Blaine asks, voice low and pleasant.
"You," Kurt says honestly.
Opening his eyes, Kurt inhales sharply. Blaine is doing that thing where he looks at Kurt with hearts in his impossible brown eyes. Like there is nothing in the world that can compare to his boyfriend's existence. It's a look that makes Kurt feel invincible to the world and completely vulnerable to Blaine.
"Yours are the sweetest eyes that I have ever seen," Kurt sings, unable to find a better way to say what he's feeling.
And Blaine, who understands that it's infinitely easier to deal with emotions when they're set to music, looks touched.
They're kissing after that, sweet and slow like they haven't had time for in months because of how stupidly busy this summer has been and how none of their friends want to leave them alone. Kurt slips his hand easily past the hem of Blaine's shirt, palm pressed into the dip of his boyfriend's back. The skin there is warm, but it's nothing compared to how hot Blaine's mouth feels against Kurt's neck.
"Missed this," Kurt sighs happily, twisting so he can pepper kisses across the crown of Blaine's head, "Missed this so much."
Blaine pulls away to smile at him. His eyes are so dark right now, all blown pupils peeking up from under his long eyelashes. He's so sinfully gorgeous like this, but Kurt has never worried about damnation before. He leans in to kiss Blaine again, because there's no reason for them not to be kissing. Blaine stops him though, pushing gently on Kurt's chest and keeping his hand above the spot where Kurt's heart pounds against his ribcage.
"I want to do something for you," Blaine says, voice liquid honey.
He slides his hand slowly downwards and Kurt has to take a deep breath, because Blaine is palming him through his jeans and Kurt is getting hard underneath his touch. He can feel his face getting hot, hating and loving it all at once. By now, Kurt feels like he should be used to Blaine touching him without embarrassment but can't.
Still, Kurt's able to push that thought away when Blaine unzips his fly. He rubs a thumb over the head of Kurt's cock and Kurt does something halfway between a gasp and a moan. Blaine laughs, a low rumble, and presses a kiss to Kurt's throat. "I love that sound."
As he trails kisses across Kurt's neck and collarbone, Blaine stops palming Kurt in order to tug at his jeans. Obediently, Kurt raises his hips and Blaine shimmies backwards until the pants are gone. Never in his life has Kurt seen someone look so ridiculous and sexy at the same time. Blaine chases that thought away when he drops a kiss in the bend of Kurt's knee and gets swatted on the shoulder for his trouble.
"That tickles," Kurt says, tracing Blaine's jaw with his thumb.
Blaine grins and moves so his face is firmed by Kurt's thighs. His hands rest at Kurt's hips, warm and steady as his thumbs dig in to the jut of bone. Kurt wishes he had a camera right now, because the sight of Blaine settled so contentedly against his body should be preserved forever.
"Shall we skip to the main event?" Blaine asks, breath warm on Kurt's thighs and one finger crooked into the waistband of his underwear.
Kurt's eyes fly open at that and he scrambles back, leaving Blaine to look hurt and squeeze his knee, gently. "Kurt, did I do something wrong?"
Kurt shakes his head furiously. "No. We just can't do that on my family's couch."
"I see," is all Blaine says, sounding incredulous until a little laugh bubbles out of him.
Then, the two of them giggle and kiss as they make their way up the stairs and into Kurt's room. They hurry through getting undressed and, since he was halfway there already, Kurt is more than glad to help Blaine.
"Any qualms about me blowing you here?" Blaine asks, cheeky, "Or do we need to change locations again?"
Kurt rolls his eyes and pouts at that, but then they're on the bed and kissing and his pretend annoyance at Blaine melts away. They take their time here, touching and teasing in ways that is rarely afforded to them. It's not like the sex they normally have; frantic and hushed, because there's always time and the chance of people walking in to worry about.
This is Blaine slowing dragging his mouth over the planes and angles of Kurt's body. This is Kurt moaning loudly when Blaine sinks down and swallows him, then chants Blaine's name rapturously until he's coming.
It's then, with his hands buried in Blaine's hair and his boyfriend's stubbled cheek resting against the oversensitive skin of his thigh that Kurt understands why so many people refer to sex as 'making love'.
~~~
Feeling boneless, Kurt drags himself to the shower, where the water is already the perfect temperature. Blaine is already waiting inside, naked. His hair is a mess, gel melting and molding to his head like a helmet. Stepping into the shower, Kurt smiles fondly and orders, "Turn around."
Blaine doesn't hesitate, even though this is the first time they've done this. Wasting no time, Kurt pumps a handful of curl safe shampoo (purchased especially for when Blaine spends the night) into his hands and starts to wash his boyfriend's hair.
In all honesty, it's a little weird to wash someone else's hair, but Kurt likes the way Blaine's hair feels in his hands and how close together they have to stand. Blaine likes it too, if the way he sighs contentedly and leans into Kurt's touch is anything to go by.
"If you ever get sick of Broadway, you could make a fortune in scalp massages."
Kurt goes mmhmm unenthusiastically and drops a kiss on Blaine's shoulder. Licking his lips afterwards, he likes the unmistakable taste of skin underneath that of water and the faint taste of soap. Grinning lazily, Kurt says, "Step forward and turn around. You need to rinse."
Blaine makes a small noise of protest, but still obeys. Immediately, Kurt's eyes drift to how hard his boyfriend is. It makes fire spread in his belly and, feeling bold and just a little bit like a porn star, Kurt reaches forward to grab Blaine's dick.
"If shampooing gets you this excited, I'd hate to see what happens after a deep conditioning."
Never mind the fact that Kurt himself has been half-hard since stepping into the shower, it's fun to tease his boyfriend as he circles the tip of Blaine's cock with his thumb. Blaine's eyes slide shut and he lets out a groan.
"We did other stuff. And you're really, really hot."
Kurt feels himself blush, which makes him feel stupid since he's already in the process of getting his boyfriend off in the shower, so one little comment shouldn't make him feel embarrassed. Pushing the thought away, he presses Blaine against the shower wall in order to kiss him.
It's all teeth and tongue for a minute, water making everything slick but Kurt's brain doesn't ever let him just enjoy things like this, because he's realizing that the lube he has is water based and that makes him worry about friction. Pulling away from the kiss and touching Blaine's hipbone gently, Kurt asks, "Is this okay?"
And Blaine looks like he might kill Kurt then and there, but then he lets out a breathy a laugh and nips Kurt on the ear. "It's more than okay. Just keep going."
Kurt nods and begins pumping his hand faster as Blaine bites on his bottom lip and then sucks softly to sooth it. The kiss is messy and hot and ends too soon, because when Blaine starts to come, he breaks away to whisper Kurt's name over and over into the expanse of his boyfriend neck.
The nice thing about shower sex, Kurt thinks as he holds up a panting Blaine, is that the mess takes care of itself. Feeling even better than he did when Blaine had got him off, Kurt wishes that they could stay under the water forever. But, eventually, the water starts to cool down and Kurt kisses his boyfriend on the jaw.
"C'mon, we have about ten seconds before it turns to ice in here."
"You didn't get to wash your hair," says Blaine, sounding torn between guilt and horror.
"I did get to make someone I love feel good though. My hair can suffer for one day."
Blaine laughs and the way it sounds reverberating in the shower is so beautiful that Kurt can't do anything but kiss him until the water starts raising goosebumps in uncomfortable places. They stumble out still clinging to each other but are suddenly, stupidly shy.
As he turns off the water and hastily wraps a towel around his hips, Kurt wonders why there seems to be such a huge difference between in the shower naked and out of the shower naked.
"Thank you," Blaine says, pressing a kiss to Kurt's cheek, "That was amazing. And not just because, y'know, shower sex."
Kurt nods, because it was nice to be so close under the spray of the the water and not having to worry about things like clothes or cleaning up right away. As he starts his post-shower exfoliation and moisturizing routine, Kurt points out, "This could easily become a regular thing when you visit me in New York, if you liked."
Blaine's eyes go wide and his ears turn red, but even as he towels his hair dry, there's a grin on his face and an unmistakable glow in his eyes.
"I'd like that a lot, actually."
~~~
"Kurt," Blaine whispers, "I'm hungry again."
Curled up against Blaine's back, Kurt feels warm and content as he mumbles into the crook of his boyfriend's neck. "Do something about it then. You know where the kitchen is."
Blaine rolls around so he can pout properly at his boyfriend. Kurt presses a kiss to his nose, then gets out of bed. They sneak downstairs, tip toeing and shushing each other, even though they have the house to themselves, for the sake of fun.
As Blaine scoops them out a ridiculously big bowl of ice cream to share, Kurt sits on the counter and swings his legs. He feels like he's eight instead of eighteen. Blaine looks it though, having traded his contacts for glasses and wearing a threadbare pair of pajama pants with a batman tee shirt. Pajamas are, by far, Kurt's favorite thing to see Blaine in, because their sleepover opportunities are few and far between.
"You're looking at me weird," Blaine informs Kurt, offering a spoonful of ice cream.
Taking the spoon graciously, Kurt just smiles and waves a hand instead of answering. Blaine smiles back with a little roll of the eyes and goes for a second spoon.
"There's no need to make more dishes," Kurt says, which only makes Blaine laugh.
"Are you going to feed me then?"
"Lazy," Kurt chides, but still holds out a spoonful of ice cream.
They take turns feeding each other and kissing in between spoonfuls. Kurt likes licking the inside of Blaine's mouth only to be met with a sweet chill and if his boyfriend has any complaints about it, he isn't voicing them. In fact, the only thing Blaine uses his voice for is singing bits of songs under his breath. Kurt recognizes each piece from the mix tape that Blaine had given him at the party on Thursday.
“I’ve been playing that song nonstop since I first heard it,” Kurt says, frowning slightly at the empty bowl of ice cream.
Blaine smiles, absentmindedly presses a kiss to Kurt’s fingertips. “Then you should sing with me.”
For a minute, Kurt thinks about protesting, because he hasn't done vocal warm ups in a week and his throat feels all weird and dairy-coated. Except, Blaine keeps smiling at him, sleepy-eyed but still excited, humming the opening bars of the first song on the mix tape.
How, Kurt wonders as he hops off the counter so he can dance with Blaine, is anyone supposed to say no to someone so adorable?
~~~
They're curled up on the couch again, watching the first film of Svenboolie's Saturday Night Double Creature Feature. It was Blaine's pick and, as unimpressed as he is with The Birds, Kurt sighs contentedly as Blaine absentmindedly draws patterns on his palm.
"This is what I'll miss the most," Blaine confesses, so quiet that Kurt barely hears him, "Just sitting with you even if we're not doing anything special. Being able to remind myself that you do exist and I'm not dreaming."
Kurt's heart somersaults in his chest, making him feel nauseous and touched all at one. He kisses Blaine's cheek, then drags his mouth along Blaine's jaw until he's softly breathing into his boyfriend's ear. Blaine shivers under him and Kurt loves it.
"Who said it's not special whenever we're together?" Kurt whispers.
Blaine shivers again and shifts so Kurt's chin is on his chest rather than his should. He's a shade of pink that delights Kurt and smiling softly when he says, "We have had some spectacular times. Remember when we first met?"
Kurt scoffs, because does Blaine honestly think he'd forget? Besides, he loves to tease Blaine about stealing lost boys away and serenading them with Katy Perry. Still, the memory makes Kurt grin and he gives his boyfriend a little push so they're lying down.
Kurt is on top of Blaine, but they're limbs are so tangled with each other and the blankets that it doesn't matter. Stretching luxuriously, Kurt kisses Blaine on the nose and says, "Dalton was fun, but we can't snub the Lima Bean. It's been essential to the growth of our relationship."
"Yeah," Blaine agrees, sounding dazed, "When I first told you I loved you there, I kept thinking that I should of been nervous or planned something big. It just kinda slipped out."
"I'm glad that it did, because I am so ridiculously in love with you."
They're quiet for a long time, Blaine running a hand through Kurt's hair, stopping occasionally to scratch at the base of his boyfriend's scalp. Kurt relaxes into the touch, soaking up the warmth radiating from Blaine's body and giving the movie a second chance.
At the commercial break, Blaine's hand stills and Kurt assumes that he's asleep. Which is fine, because the exhaustion from the week is creeping back into his bones. Shutting his eyes, Kurt is ready for sleep when Blaine speaks up again.
"Kurt, if something happens to us-"
"Nothing is going to happen," Kurt says, suddenly awake, "We're solid."
Blaine ignores him. "If something happens, I'll always be glad of all the places we have. Like the Dalton common room or the Lima Bean, because then I have permanent reminders about how much we loved each other."
They both start rattling of things that are undeniably theirs then. Singing a duet at Regionals. Movie marathons in the common rooms at Dalton. Spending the opening night of West Side Story together. The day at the lake over the summer, when everyone else went to town and they were finally, gloriously alone.
On the TV, the group drives into the sunrise through the flocks of birds. The ambiguous ending hits a little too close to home right now and Kurt clutches Blaine's shirt more tightly than necessary. He's thinking about how Blaine is right about the quiet moments being the ones that you miss the most, because they can seem so small compared to the grand gestures and milestones. They're too easy to forget.
Quietly, Kurt says, "Even though I already miss you and the few good spots of this stupid town, I'm really excited for New York."
The thought has been haunting Kurt since he got his NYADA acceptance letter. Once New York became real, he tried to be careful whenever he even thought of it. That meant emotional whiplash as he went from excitement to finally getting out of Ohio to guilt, because it's been his home all his life. Now that he's finally admitted it, Kurt feels relief flood him.
He's imagined Blaine reacting to this a thousand times, late at night when he played the scene over and over in his head. But he imagination was never good enough for what reality offers: Blaine smiling sadly and hugging Kurt tightly. His voice is wavering, but he still reassures Kurt that he's okay with it.
"Besides, it's not like we won't have Christmas or spring break or the rest of our lives together."
Kurt seriously can't believe how in love he is right now. And how in love he'll be at Christmas and spring break and however long Blaine is at his side. As he kisses Blaine, steady and sure, Kurt thinks, We'll always have tonight, too.