twix are yummy, realizations are not.

[st_jimmymersury]

There's several things I would love to punch my dad in the face about: leaving my mom, saddling us with so much worry, all those times he was drunk, ignoring me, blowing me off, telling me not to sing in the car, etc etc. The list goes on and on. But the big one, especiallly right now is making me grow up so fast. I feel like a mini adult right now, instead of a sixteen year old. I should be wild and reckless; stupid but free. It's Friday night- I should be out, wreaking mayhem with my friends, mad at Mom for not agreeing to buy me a new cell phone or a car, the only thing I should care about is me; instead, I'm sitting here on my bed, alone, worrying, at 8:22. Pardon me, 8:23. I shouldn't be worrying about when I'm going to get my next paycheck. I shouldn't be worrying about whether or not we're going to be evicted from the house. I shouldn't have to worry about whether or not I'm going to have to ship my cat off to a foster home or not. I shouldn't have to worry about breaking my boyfriend's heart because I want to break up so badly. Life should be some joyous selfish whirl right now...instead i feel like an old woman, stressing and worrying my life away.

I'll die of a heart attack by 25. I swear.

-Kays