SYMPTOMS OF THE APOCALYPSE
we can all agree
there are so many things
cell phones, information, the internet, wii, i
out there to make our lives easier
all the little aches and pains duller and duller until we think they're gone but they've really been replaced with other little aches and pains.
this process, in the medical world, is called anesthesia
anesthesia is basically relieving one pain by creating another
ie. you feel lonely and isolated so you create a Myspace blog
i've identified the symptoms of anesthetic toxicity (when anesthesia becomes harmful to the patient) with the symptoms of the Apocalypse (i mean a consciousness Apocalypse where one comes to the fore of whom one really is beneath the cancroid mass of shit [willing and unwillingly] surrounding him). i'm not going to pretend to have invented this concept though i may be a practitioner in spirit, but it was best described by Kierkegaard as, "the dizziness of freedom which occurs when the spirit would posit the synthesis, and freedom then gazes down into its own possibility, grasping at finiteness to sustain itself."
so anyway, a consciousness Apocalypse is the moment an individual makes a decision, either to look themself plain-in-the-face for whom they really are, or to continue consuming anesthetics until they no longer resemble a human being but become a corporate, commercial, consumption organ/ trash can.
AND NOW - the symptoms of anesthetic toxicity (aka. a $ 2,000 shopping spree) are as follows:
Heart Arrhythmia*
Seizures
Unconsciousness*
Agitation*
Confusion*
Dizziness*
Blurred Vision*
Tinnitus*
A metallic taste in the mouth
Nausea*
(an * indicates symptoms i personally experience every time i shop in the mall or every time i leave the house, ever)
(yeah, i can't believe that's actually true but really, being out there, in the WORLD is sometimes too much for me, but anyway-)
this is a picture of a union soldier (American Civil War 1861-1865), patient, recieving chloroform anesthesia on a wooden cart. in case you can't tell what's happening, he's about to have his leg sawed off below the knee. i know, this is just some random picture from the internet and the whole thing could have totally been staged, but i think it clearly illustrates the point im trying to make here, tonight, in front of the computer in my aunt's house in the country, that ANESTHETICS usually RELIEVE ONE SHITTY THING BY INDUCING ANOTHER SHITTY THING.
and thus is the foundation of (if not a part of the circumstance regarding the nature of) mon philosophie de temps.
HEY: Dostoevsky's 'Notes From Underground' was published in 1864. I'm mentioning this because once at Cafe Mocha a customer's change was 18.64 and he asked me what happened in 1864, and I told him, "Dostoevsky's 'Notes From Underground' was published." I don't think he was expecting me to say that considering how awkward our interactions were from that point on. He even hesitated to give me a tip, his hand lingered over the jar for what felt like ten damn minutes. I'm blushing just thinking about it.