past pops up
it still amazes me how alone and scared i can feel sometimes...its like i think ive gotten away from it...gotten away from all those feelings that were there..and then i feel that again...i guess thats just apart of being human..and having feelings..but it scares me..i dont want to go back to where i was...i dont want to go back to being weak i guess. i dont want to have to depend on people or to not be okay with being alone. it scares me. i want to be able to take care of myself and to be strong. i know that no one is totally strong and that everyone needs other people but i dont want to be the way i was. its like even though i know that i am a different person and that i have changed and gotten stronger when i feel that scared or sadness its like none of that matters. i dont know. ill figure it out