i wanted to stay, i wanted to play, i wanted to love you.

[srod]

i'm beginning to think that people's
perceptions of the the things i say
are contrary to the actual meaning?
is it b/c i'm not good at explaining
myself or i'm using all the wrong words?
i wish i knew every word in the dictionary,
spelling, defination, and part of speech
i know it sounds crazy, but i wish more
people could understand me and my thoughts
and ideas and dreams and views and beliefs
i'm not complaining, just trying to recognize
the abundant amount of people that are probably
taking me all wrong... ? shit.

.................................................

in other news.. well actually speaking
of people taking me all wrong.. i know
for a fact that i'm definately not
explaining myself to a particular person
and i feel bad that i'm keeping my thoughts
and feelings from that person- but i feel
it best if i keep them to myself in this
situation..b/c i know if i even mention
anything it'll probably fuck everything up...
as long as that person is happy with what
they are doing and how they are going about
things, than I'm happy b/c that person is
the last person i want to see sad.

.....................................................

this wasn't wasn't half bad... i guess..
i'm just countin down the days til i see
my mama :)

.....................................................

things are over, and hopefully for good
whatever that was?? all i know was it
was a waste of my got damn time. ha.

.....................................................

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