GRAGH!
Okay... ranty-mope thing. Go.
So yesterday went to the ranch for what will probably be the last time for a year. I don't see much of a chance of me going back there this week. So i was really looking forward to it because it'd also be my last chance to ride Top for a year. So I had really wanted to go for a looong ride ot the woods or something...
We get there a little lat and we were supposed to leave pretty early because my friend had to see other hroses and feed them fair enough... Don't really like it but I didn't complain since I know I'm pretty much cutting into her time as it is...
So we get to the ranch, see all the horses and for some reason my friend (who is horse savvy and was not even four days ago explaining how she wasn't scared of any horse) kept getting 'uncomfortable' around the horses. Mind you these are all horses I know (bar one, but I kept her away from my friend) and horses I trust completely and utterly. I seriously cannot think of herds that're more reliable than the ones at the ranch. But fine, whatever... sometimes it can be intimidating the a 700lbs animal comes charing up to you... I can somewhat understand that, although it was a bit surprising to see from my friend as she's USED to the damn animals! Her own horse is much much less reliable than ANY horse at the ranch.
That aside... we were supposed ot go for a ride... Ifigure i can stuff her on Sunny... Sunny is the easiest ride we currently have on the ranch. I know she wanted BEau, but I ignored those hitns as Beaus is not mine ofthe taking and he's not an easy horse to ride and i know she's terrified of cantering him and HEY! It's my last ride on my own horse for a year, I wanted ot blood well have a bit of a canter!
i get Sunny for her out of hte pasture and she promptly starts stalling, getting another drink, going to the toilet, not really moving along all that fast... so I gather her tack, help her tack, and groom and all that, tack my own horse in the meantime, even find her a helmet and help her adjust it because she insisted on one. She hadn't brought her own like she normally does, whihc of course hsould've been my first hint. I sit around waiting for her ot return from yet another bathroom visit... When we're finally all set up to go I help her mount, adjust her stirrups for her and then get on myself so we can get a bloody move on since at this point we only have about 2 hours left to ride so a ride to the woods is already not going to happen.
But there's plenty of other routes so I'm not too upset about it, it's a bumer since I really wanted to but, oh well... so i plot another route, she agrees to it but the horses (mine in particular) are being a bit of twats. sunny doesn't really wanna go first and Top's a chickenshit and sees everythig nas a predator. So after a bit of a disagreement with im I do get him going. There were a few 'almost turn to go home' inidents but nothing big.
She's already twitchy and going on and on about how 'they're not having their day' erm... sure they are but thye don't know eachother nad well... Sunny is a mare and Top's a twat. They get like that sometimes... I convince her everything is fine and go on... but we're not moving exactly fast so I sortof comment on that the other route i had planned might be a bit long, she almost LEAPS on the chance and says "maybe we hsould take a shorter route since they're not really having hteir day anyway... it doesn't feel right."
Well that rather annoyed me because she's just bloody chickening out again and blaming it on the horses trying us out a bit. I mena they haven't been ridden in 3 weeks and we immediatly go ut on a trail ride with horses that don't even know one another. Is it that surprising they're trying us out a bit?
But anyway... I concede and say we'll take another route, so I replot and we go... Top has another few spaztic moments but all is well otherwise... I pick up a trot she starts .. well... moaning is the only word for it that the saddle I gave her jingles nad Sunny supposedly finds it scary. Dude, I backed her using that saddle. Sunny is NOT impressed by some jingling on the tack! But I choose not to reply because I knwo it's only going to get into an argument... So we carry on at a decent trot, nothing to worry about except she's complaining that sunny does trot fast. Well she's always forward and she's trying to keep up with Top who has a ridiculous ground covering stride...
We round the corner onto another path which has THE best setting for a nice long canter. So I suggest a canter and she immediatly goes "Noooo! I don't feel that secure on Sunny yet!" again I'm a bit annoyed, I mena for fuck's sake, she's a horse she's not suddenly going to do a 180 personality wise, she's easy to stop and steer and she has wonderful gaits to ride but noooo... so I don't wanna force her so I concede and hold out on the canter but this makes Top a bit fizzy because we usually canter there. He doesn't even get weird, just forwar.d So I let him trot and she complain we're trotting to fast. Now mind you that the WHOLE ride, on ALL ride I'm always collecting Top so the other horses can keep up. It's all off my seat os the reins are prettyslack the whole time, but I figured I'd give her a demo and stopped ocllecting him so Top flew off on his regular tempo, leaving Sunny behind quite a bit os Sunny had ot do overtime to keep up and failed even that. So Me being sortof nice I collect Top again so Sunny won't break into canter... she has a whole "NUUUU!" moment over it because we of COURSE were going to fast.
Get to the end of the path, take Top back to walk to cross the cyclist lanes nad he turns into a right ass... It's like instantly he developed terra-fear... where they're terrified of changing on the ground... so he spazze,s almsot crahsing into a cyclist so at this point I figure 'he's jsut being an ass' and I normally don't have to get strong with him but when he's ignoring my aids and turning reckles,s I NEED to get strong with him because I simply can't have a horseb eing dangerous. So I snarl at him , tell him off and he fidgets because well... I'm mad and Top's always scared to do shit wrong... so he fizzes and fidgets and moves about the pace... I mena... I know what I'm doing, it's my horse, no one knows him better than I od and I had him under control even though he was a bit nervous. Somehow though she htought it'd be a good idea to go "EASYBOYEASYBOYEASYBOY!" in a high pitch and just yelling it at us basically... because that's what calms horses down apparently...
We move on... again... Top settles back down again for the most part, she continues on talking about what is all happening and why it's happening and how the horses are being soooo weird. Well yeah they'reb eing weird because we're not doing much of anything that we normally do! But I choose not ot reply to any of her chatter anymore at this point unless I'll say something I'll regret... we move along get to another intersection and Top REFUSES to go through mud and almost bends lie ka pretzelto avoid going near it. At this point I'm pretty fed up with his antics, so to make sure he remembers that he was taught NOT to run away from scary stuff I force him over it a couple of times, leaving my friend and Sunny ot their own devices for a bit. Meaning they stand in the middle of the road waiting for us.
Que my friend having another moan/whine/bitch about the whole thing and constantly asking me why he's oing this nad where we're supposed ot go. This is a route we follow ALL THE TIME. It's the standard hack out and about, it's not like she doens't KNOW where we're going and it's not like she's never seen me train a horse before so this should all be pretty damn obvious!
Eventually I let Top calm and settle down a bit, give him a pat tell him he's good and we move on, the problem with the ground was fixed now and he stoppedb eing a major jack... so we ride on through a bit of the town and Top wants ot dodge and run from everything that scars him again. Everything I never wanted him to learn basically... So I figure we'll do some more trainign since he needs to learn this shit anyway and since I wasn't going to get much of fun riding done with scaredycat tagging along I figured i might as well make it a learning curve for him.
So we leave the little town and there's a car path runnign straight along and parallel to it is another path but it's on a 2m rise or so. There's logs on it, have been for a while but you can easily ride past it, there's a lot of room next ot it but it'd force him to walk past scary stuff and woudln't giveh im the chance ot avoid it. Ifigure this would be a good learning curve, so I go up there nad Top reckons "NOO!" So he tried to turn away and get out but is blockedi n by Sunny, which is perfect because i don't want him to run away from it, so I turn him back around and she starts...
"Im' not doing this! I'm going the other way!" I tell her to just give me a fucking moment and let me sort this out with Top but she doesn't listen and ride along on the lower/main road. I'm annoyed because she doesn't listen but put it aside and figure i cna probably get Top past the logs anyway... She goes on with her whining about "Why do you have to go there anyway!?" so fed up I explain to her I don't want a horse with no backbone and I want a horse who'll just listen tome and trust me nad that i don't want him to think he can run away from everything that scares him!
I thought it was pretty damn obvious but apparently I was wrong... but being half wiht Top and half snarling at her what I thought was apparent I'm not really ... into it I guess... so I manage to get Top close ot the logs, he knows he can go past it and he knows there's a 2meter drop to where Sunny is but still, somehow the logs were thusy terrifying (because there was a darker coloured one in the bunch) and he figurs "fuck this hsit, I'm going to Sunny!"
So before I can do anything he tries to scramble down a 2meter drop. This is physically impossible for any horse without at leasT SOME jumping but Top doesn't really do mdoeration so he takes a fucking leap of faith, clearing the WHOLE street. In an instinctual reaction I move with him, putting my hands forward as not to pull on his mouth (whihc I can't anyway because he's ridden in a halter). He lands on the other side of the road... and because there's a gap there, with lots of wate,r he turns sharpy to run back to Sunny. At this point I had no stirrups, no balance heck I was still mostly on the air so when he turns I get dumped...
Nothing too bad, fell on my hip, so my back hurt like a bitch but oh well... nothing broken so i get up after a few moments to make sure everything is in working order only to see my friend nad SUnny trot/cantering after Top who seems ot be headed home. So I yell at her to fucking turn the mare around. You don't try to stop a horse when that happens, you just turn them around so they can't follow anymore! Simple enough, right? So she listens to me and finally turns her aorund, Top stops almsot immediatly and stands there a bit awkwardly but otherwise unharmed....
At this point my friend feels it's necessary to tell me in an almsot tear-strained voice "I'm REALLY not having fun anymore now!"
OH NO FUCKING SHIT! >.<
I try my best not to jerk her off of Sunny and kill her, instead going over to Top, giving him a quick look for injuries and a pat because first time for him that he lost his rider as well... so he's a bit O___O about the whole thing.
I get back on and my friend goes "This was your own fault you know..." I BARELY keep from exploding and try to rationally tell her that if she'd jsut stayed where I told her, this might not have happened because he wouldn't have been able to jump toward Sunny. We have a minor argument until she goes "Oh well! Shit just happens I guess." I grind my teeth but leave it at that... then she goes "Don't you wish you'd worn a helmet now, like me?"
I knwo she probbly meant it as a joke but at the point I really was NOT amused since she was moaning baout a helmet the whole time and I fucking FELL ON MY HIP! No HELMET would've made a fucking difference! My head never even touched the fucking ground! And trust me, my stiff neck can attest to that fact! She continue to jammer on and on about how Sunny was so great and not really hard at all and she had her reined back even before i siad ot turn her around. I broodily ignore all this shit because it's her standard bravado to coverup that she's scared shitless...
She subsides a little so she may finally realize I'm pissed off. Not with Top or anything, just in general and at her behavior during the most part of the ride... we'reo n the home stretch now and I'm getting cold so I suggest a trot. Well I have to SCREAM it at herb ecause for some reason while she's heard me the whole trip suddenly she can't hear what I'm saying anymore... she does a whole moan/whine/bitch that "we're almost there anyway!" I snap at her that we might as well trot then and pick up a trot wheter she wants to or not.
Half way along she goes "Oh! Sunny is suddenly being SO GOOD!"
NO YOU TWAT! SHE'S BEEN FUCING AWESOME THE WHOLE RIDE ALREADY, YOU'VE JUST BEEN TOO BUSY FREAKING THE FUCK OUT OT NOTICE WHAT AN INCREDIBLE HORSE SHE IS!
I don't say anything of this nadj ust ride back home... untack and huge with Top for a bit because it was a ride of complete and UTTER fail. Seriously the worst ride EVER. There was not a single thing that was actually fun or really enjoyable except for the trot at the canter path, but even that's sortof blown because ... IT'S A CANTER PATH!
I'm probably being a fucking bitter bitch but I really feel like the whole ride was completely ruinedb ecause my friend was being a chickenshit about EVERYTHING. I love her to death, she's a great friend and always there for me when I need something and she's very thoughtful most of the time but this was the ONE thing I REALLY REALLY looked forward to and it just feels like she blew it... I don't know... it bums me...
And because one drama wasn't enough to ruin my day we add another one on top of it...
We went pretty much straight home after that, did get to say a quick goodbye to HEnk who told me not to drive without a license, apparently he was really worried about that. Which is sortof sweet... ANyway... went home, were supposed ot walk with the dogs. To get them used to one another... Something we had the whole month for but desite my urging it somehow never happened. So we go to my friend's house she invites me in for a drink, no thanks.. ratherj ust get going and then go home so I can sulk... so we go to neutral territory, I let Amy out of the car... she goes off to do her own thing. We get Wolf out of the car hwo almost immediatly tries ot hunt down her tral...
No problem just yet but within 10 minutes i's deteriorated to the point where Wolf actually tried to hurt Amy and Amy was really going into a trauma induced shock. So that was epic fail like we had never failed before. It simply isn't going to work between them...
So I firgure I'll mail Isabel and plead to leave Amy with her and was laready plotting out how much I'd have to pay Isabel per month to cover the basic expenses of a dog...
I come home, I mail ISabel and then pretty much wash out and collapse into bed and drift off int oa comatose state. Apparently I was called tow or three times but I neer heard, being in a coma of emotional exhaustion so I wake around 2am, wide awake.. find two emails concerning Amy in my mailbox. One form Isabel saying 'dammit well alright but I wants money' which is nothing but fair, I also gave her money for the cat so...
Then another mail form her mother... saying she didn't really think it was a good idea to keep a dog and a cat in the same flat and that she'd tried to call me about it but I didn't answer.
Well no...
So thye don't want Amy to go to isabel because they don't think it's be wise... they are willing to take her in temporarily and look for a good home for her for the remainder of the year...
So... yeah... I really don't know about this, I'm a bit reluctant to leave her when I'm not sure where she's going. No let me rephrase that; I actually really just DON'T wanna leave her if I don't know where she's going and who is going to take care of her etc.
I also am reluctant to have her moving all over the place, she's already upset enough as it is that we're no longer a family and then I'd also be leaving her behind if on top of that she's going to get moved around some more, I don't know it just doens't feel right...
But on the other hand I really have nothing else to turn to really. I have 4 days to find her a place ot stay for a year and get her there etc. and am really pretty fresh out of good options...
I hate it when things don't go the way I planned them, so now I'm even more upset than I was when I went to sleep...
I'm sore, I feel like crying the whole time and really everything basically sucks right now...
So yesterday went to the ranch for what will probably be the last time for a year. I don't see much of a chance of me going back there this week. So i was really looking forward to it because it'd also be my last chance to ride Top for a year. So I had really wanted to go for a looong ride ot the woods or something...
We get there a little lat and we were supposed to leave pretty early because my friend had to see other hroses and feed them fair enough... Don't really like it but I didn't complain since I know I'm pretty much cutting into her time as it is...
So we get to the ranch, see all the horses and for some reason my friend (who is horse savvy and was not even four days ago explaining how she wasn't scared of any horse) kept getting 'uncomfortable' around the horses. Mind you these are all horses I know (bar one, but I kept her away from my friend) and horses I trust completely and utterly. I seriously cannot think of herds that're more reliable than the ones at the ranch. But fine, whatever... sometimes it can be intimidating the a 700lbs animal comes charing up to you... I can somewhat understand that, although it was a bit surprising to see from my friend as she's USED to the damn animals! Her own horse is much much less reliable than ANY horse at the ranch.
That aside... we were supposed ot go for a ride... Ifigure i can stuff her on Sunny... Sunny is the easiest ride we currently have on the ranch. I know she wanted BEau, but I ignored those hitns as Beaus is not mine ofthe taking and he's not an easy horse to ride and i know she's terrified of cantering him and HEY! It's my last ride on my own horse for a year, I wanted ot blood well have a bit of a canter!
i get Sunny for her out of hte pasture and she promptly starts stalling, getting another drink, going to the toilet, not really moving along all that fast... so I gather her tack, help her tack, and groom and all that, tack my own horse in the meantime, even find her a helmet and help her adjust it because she insisted on one. She hadn't brought her own like she normally does, whihc of course hsould've been my first hint. I sit around waiting for her ot return from yet another bathroom visit... When we're finally all set up to go I help her mount, adjust her stirrups for her and then get on myself so we can get a bloody move on since at this point we only have about 2 hours left to ride so a ride to the woods is already not going to happen.
But there's plenty of other routes so I'm not too upset about it, it's a bumer since I really wanted to but, oh well... so i plot another route, she agrees to it but the horses (mine in particular) are being a bit of twats. sunny doesn't really wanna go first and Top's a chickenshit and sees everythig nas a predator. So after a bit of a disagreement with im I do get him going. There were a few 'almost turn to go home' inidents but nothing big.
She's already twitchy and going on and on about how 'they're not having their day' erm... sure they are but thye don't know eachother nad well... Sunny is a mare and Top's a twat. They get like that sometimes... I convince her everything is fine and go on... but we're not moving exactly fast so I sortof comment on that the other route i had planned might be a bit long, she almost LEAPS on the chance and says "maybe we hsould take a shorter route since they're not really having hteir day anyway... it doesn't feel right."
Well that rather annoyed me because she's just bloody chickening out again and blaming it on the horses trying us out a bit. I mena they haven't been ridden in 3 weeks and we immediatly go ut on a trail ride with horses that don't even know one another. Is it that surprising they're trying us out a bit?
But anyway... I concede and say we'll take another route, so I replot and we go... Top has another few spaztic moments but all is well otherwise... I pick up a trot she starts .. well... moaning is the only word for it that the saddle I gave her jingles nad Sunny supposedly finds it scary. Dude, I backed her using that saddle. Sunny is NOT impressed by some jingling on the tack! But I choose not to reply because I knwo it's only going to get into an argument... So we carry on at a decent trot, nothing to worry about except she's complaining that sunny does trot fast. Well she's always forward and she's trying to keep up with Top who has a ridiculous ground covering stride...
We round the corner onto another path which has THE best setting for a nice long canter. So I suggest a canter and she immediatly goes "Noooo! I don't feel that secure on Sunny yet!" again I'm a bit annoyed, I mena for fuck's sake, she's a horse she's not suddenly going to do a 180 personality wise, she's easy to stop and steer and she has wonderful gaits to ride but noooo... so I don't wanna force her so I concede and hold out on the canter but this makes Top a bit fizzy because we usually canter there. He doesn't even get weird, just forwar.d So I let him trot and she complain we're trotting to fast. Now mind you that the WHOLE ride, on ALL ride I'm always collecting Top so the other horses can keep up. It's all off my seat os the reins are prettyslack the whole time, but I figured I'd give her a demo and stopped ocllecting him so Top flew off on his regular tempo, leaving Sunny behind quite a bit os Sunny had ot do overtime to keep up and failed even that. So Me being sortof nice I collect Top again so Sunny won't break into canter... she has a whole "NUUUU!" moment over it because we of COURSE were going to fast.
Get to the end of the path, take Top back to walk to cross the cyclist lanes nad he turns into a right ass... It's like instantly he developed terra-fear... where they're terrified of changing on the ground... so he spazze,s almsot crahsing into a cyclist so at this point I figure 'he's jsut being an ass' and I normally don't have to get strong with him but when he's ignoring my aids and turning reckles,s I NEED to get strong with him because I simply can't have a horseb eing dangerous. So I snarl at him , tell him off and he fidgets because well... I'm mad and Top's always scared to do shit wrong... so he fizzes and fidgets and moves about the pace... I mena... I know what I'm doing, it's my horse, no one knows him better than I od and I had him under control even though he was a bit nervous. Somehow though she htought it'd be a good idea to go "EASYBOYEASYBOYEASYBOY!" in a high pitch and just yelling it at us basically... because that's what calms horses down apparently...
We move on... again... Top settles back down again for the most part, she continues on talking about what is all happening and why it's happening and how the horses are being soooo weird. Well yeah they'reb eing weird because we're not doing much of anything that we normally do! But I choose not ot reply to any of her chatter anymore at this point unless I'll say something I'll regret... we move along get to another intersection and Top REFUSES to go through mud and almost bends lie ka pretzelto avoid going near it. At this point I'm pretty fed up with his antics, so to make sure he remembers that he was taught NOT to run away from scary stuff I force him over it a couple of times, leaving my friend and Sunny ot their own devices for a bit. Meaning they stand in the middle of the road waiting for us.
Que my friend having another moan/whine/bitch about the whole thing and constantly asking me why he's oing this nad where we're supposed ot go. This is a route we follow ALL THE TIME. It's the standard hack out and about, it's not like she doens't KNOW where we're going and it's not like she's never seen me train a horse before so this should all be pretty damn obvious!
Eventually I let Top calm and settle down a bit, give him a pat tell him he's good and we move on, the problem with the ground was fixed now and he stoppedb eing a major jack... so we ride on through a bit of the town and Top wants ot dodge and run from everything that scars him again. Everything I never wanted him to learn basically... So I figure we'll do some more trainign since he needs to learn this shit anyway and since I wasn't going to get much of fun riding done with scaredycat tagging along I figured i might as well make it a learning curve for him.
So we leave the little town and there's a car path runnign straight along and parallel to it is another path but it's on a 2m rise or so. There's logs on it, have been for a while but you can easily ride past it, there's a lot of room next ot it but it'd force him to walk past scary stuff and woudln't giveh im the chance ot avoid it. Ifigure this would be a good learning curve, so I go up there nad Top reckons "NOO!" So he tried to turn away and get out but is blockedi n by Sunny, which is perfect because i don't want him to run away from it, so I turn him back around and she starts...
"Im' not doing this! I'm going the other way!" I tell her to just give me a fucking moment and let me sort this out with Top but she doesn't listen and ride along on the lower/main road. I'm annoyed because she doesn't listen but put it aside and figure i cna probably get Top past the logs anyway... She goes on with her whining about "Why do you have to go there anyway!?" so fed up I explain to her I don't want a horse with no backbone and I want a horse who'll just listen tome and trust me nad that i don't want him to think he can run away from everything that scares him!
I thought it was pretty damn obvious but apparently I was wrong... but being half wiht Top and half snarling at her what I thought was apparent I'm not really ... into it I guess... so I manage to get Top close ot the logs, he knows he can go past it and he knows there's a 2meter drop to where Sunny is but still, somehow the logs were thusy terrifying (because there was a darker coloured one in the bunch) and he figurs "fuck this hsit, I'm going to Sunny!"
So before I can do anything he tries to scramble down a 2meter drop. This is physically impossible for any horse without at leasT SOME jumping but Top doesn't really do mdoeration so he takes a fucking leap of faith, clearing the WHOLE street. In an instinctual reaction I move with him, putting my hands forward as not to pull on his mouth (whihc I can't anyway because he's ridden in a halter). He lands on the other side of the road... and because there's a gap there, with lots of wate,r he turns sharpy to run back to Sunny. At this point I had no stirrups, no balance heck I was still mostly on the air so when he turns I get dumped...
Nothing too bad, fell on my hip, so my back hurt like a bitch but oh well... nothing broken so i get up after a few moments to make sure everything is in working order only to see my friend nad SUnny trot/cantering after Top who seems ot be headed home. So I yell at her to fucking turn the mare around. You don't try to stop a horse when that happens, you just turn them around so they can't follow anymore! Simple enough, right? So she listens to me and finally turns her aorund, Top stops almsot immediatly and stands there a bit awkwardly but otherwise unharmed....
At this point my friend feels it's necessary to tell me in an almsot tear-strained voice "I'm REALLY not having fun anymore now!"
OH NO FUCKING SHIT! >.<
I try my best not to jerk her off of Sunny and kill her, instead going over to Top, giving him a quick look for injuries and a pat because first time for him that he lost his rider as well... so he's a bit O___O about the whole thing.
I get back on and my friend goes "This was your own fault you know..." I BARELY keep from exploding and try to rationally tell her that if she'd jsut stayed where I told her, this might not have happened because he wouldn't have been able to jump toward Sunny. We have a minor argument until she goes "Oh well! Shit just happens I guess." I grind my teeth but leave it at that... then she goes "Don't you wish you'd worn a helmet now, like me?"
I knwo she probbly meant it as a joke but at the point I really was NOT amused since she was moaning baout a helmet the whole time and I fucking FELL ON MY HIP! No HELMET would've made a fucking difference! My head never even touched the fucking ground! And trust me, my stiff neck can attest to that fact! She continue to jammer on and on about how Sunny was so great and not really hard at all and she had her reined back even before i siad ot turn her around. I broodily ignore all this shit because it's her standard bravado to coverup that she's scared shitless...
She subsides a little so she may finally realize I'm pissed off. Not with Top or anything, just in general and at her behavior during the most part of the ride... we'reo n the home stretch now and I'm getting cold so I suggest a trot. Well I have to SCREAM it at herb ecause for some reason while she's heard me the whole trip suddenly she can't hear what I'm saying anymore... she does a whole moan/whine/bitch that "we're almost there anyway!" I snap at her that we might as well trot then and pick up a trot wheter she wants to or not.
Half way along she goes "Oh! Sunny is suddenly being SO GOOD!"
NO YOU TWAT! SHE'S BEEN FUCING AWESOME THE WHOLE RIDE ALREADY, YOU'VE JUST BEEN TOO BUSY FREAKING THE FUCK OUT OT NOTICE WHAT AN INCREDIBLE HORSE SHE IS!
I don't say anything of this nadj ust ride back home... untack and huge with Top for a bit because it was a ride of complete and UTTER fail. Seriously the worst ride EVER. There was not a single thing that was actually fun or really enjoyable except for the trot at the canter path, but even that's sortof blown because ... IT'S A CANTER PATH!
I'm probably being a fucking bitter bitch but I really feel like the whole ride was completely ruinedb ecause my friend was being a chickenshit about EVERYTHING. I love her to death, she's a great friend and always there for me when I need something and she's very thoughtful most of the time but this was the ONE thing I REALLY REALLY looked forward to and it just feels like she blew it... I don't know... it bums me...
And because one drama wasn't enough to ruin my day we add another one on top of it...
We went pretty much straight home after that, did get to say a quick goodbye to HEnk who told me not to drive without a license, apparently he was really worried about that. Which is sortof sweet... ANyway... went home, were supposed ot walk with the dogs. To get them used to one another... Something we had the whole month for but desite my urging it somehow never happened. So we go to my friend's house she invites me in for a drink, no thanks.. ratherj ust get going and then go home so I can sulk... so we go to neutral territory, I let Amy out of the car... she goes off to do her own thing. We get Wolf out of the car hwo almost immediatly tries ot hunt down her tral...
No problem just yet but within 10 minutes i's deteriorated to the point where Wolf actually tried to hurt Amy and Amy was really going into a trauma induced shock. So that was epic fail like we had never failed before. It simply isn't going to work between them...
So I firgure I'll mail Isabel and plead to leave Amy with her and was laready plotting out how much I'd have to pay Isabel per month to cover the basic expenses of a dog...
I come home, I mail ISabel and then pretty much wash out and collapse into bed and drift off int oa comatose state. Apparently I was called tow or three times but I neer heard, being in a coma of emotional exhaustion so I wake around 2am, wide awake.. find two emails concerning Amy in my mailbox. One form Isabel saying 'dammit well alright but I wants money' which is nothing but fair, I also gave her money for the cat so...
Then another mail form her mother... saying she didn't really think it was a good idea to keep a dog and a cat in the same flat and that she'd tried to call me about it but I didn't answer.
Well no...
So thye don't want Amy to go to isabel because they don't think it's be wise... they are willing to take her in temporarily and look for a good home for her for the remainder of the year...
So... yeah... I really don't know about this, I'm a bit reluctant to leave her when I'm not sure where she's going. No let me rephrase that; I actually really just DON'T wanna leave her if I don't know where she's going and who is going to take care of her etc.
I also am reluctant to have her moving all over the place, she's already upset enough as it is that we're no longer a family and then I'd also be leaving her behind if on top of that she's going to get moved around some more, I don't know it just doens't feel right...
But on the other hand I really have nothing else to turn to really. I have 4 days to find her a place ot stay for a year and get her there etc. and am really pretty fresh out of good options...
I hate it when things don't go the way I planned them, so now I'm even more upset than I was when I went to sleep...
I'm sore, I feel like crying the whole time and really everything basically sucks right now...