One step forward, two steps back….
Originally published at shanefitzsimmons.com. You can comment here or there.
Life took a turn for the shitty today. I was supposed to go out with my photographer boss to start selling my services and learning the trade, but when I arrived at his house today he let me know that he’s having some pretty serious family troubles that have just come up over the weekend, and, to make a very long story very short, he’s going to be devoting all his spare time trying to fix these problems, which gives him basically zero time to be training me.
He doesn’t know how long he’ll be busy, but he said that, worst case scenario, it’ll be until this fall. That’s like, five months away.
This, to be perfectly honest, sucks. I’ve been working my entire life around the prospect of this job. I haven’t been looking for traditional full-time employment because I wanted to make sure that I’d have the time for this. And worst of all, I’ve been looking forward to this.
Worse yet, he doesn’t know how long it’s going to take. Fall is worst-case scenario, but it might be as little as a week. He’ll know in a week whether this is long-term or not, but even if it is, there are circumstances that might enable this to be done with by May, and if not then, then we’re probably looking at fall.
How many fucking times has this kind of shit happened to me though? Where I’ve been dragged along by employers but not really given a definitive answer or timetable on what to expect.
The good news is, I asked him point blank and he answered just as readily that this isn’t about me, and that when this stuff blows over he’s going to want me back, though he also made it clear that he’ll completely understand if I’ve moved on.
I really don’t know what to do here, because I was and have been looking forward to this. I mostly just want to hold out, but past experience has taught me again and again that if you hold out for one person’s decision who’s stringing you along, you’re going to get burned.
In other news, I got my license plate, so that’s fun. I also got a letter from the bank that’s loaning me the money for my car, letting me know that my insurance plan on the car is unacceptable and I need to get a more expensive one.
Gay.