DrAmA . . .
well..sorry i rarely update anymore, i never really feel like it, but i do still try to read all ur guys' journals...so that works i suppose. alright well yesterday was a very interesting day... pretty damn shitty..
so thursday nite i find out that dan is sayin shit about me being a bitch and stuff, and i got pretty pissed. so i go into school yest mornin feelin like shit, and like i dunno i was on the verge of crying. so my eyes were watering and i just made up excuses,lol like my fave one was tellin tiff that it was windy in the hallways. haha. wow that was classic. so yeah then dan sees me a few times tries sayin hi and talkin to me, and i wasnt even in the mood to talk to him. so i just kinda didnt. then i get to english 3º and like im sittin there doin my math homework and i just break down crying, thankfully i dont think no one saw me...but yeah it sucked. so i get to lunch 5º wanting to cry again but i just kinda kept it in... then i went thru the rest of the day havin like 50 ppl askin if i was mad at dan and shit, but i tried stayin fairly happy. then i came home, slept like till 530 cuz i had a headache and was just stressed as hell. then i get up get ready, and pick up kristyn for the game at like 640. when we were supposed to be there at 630, but my sis couldnt find her keys. so we get to the field, get yelled at for being late and barth tells us we are benched for the beginning of the game. so i went to the bathroom to change into my body suit, and just broke down bawling...then i went back out to stretch and shit and just couldnt hold it in, so im sittin there bawling my eyes out havin like everyone ask if i was okay, and like im so glad all my friends care, but everyone knows how it is to just kinda wanna be left alone.like it was almost like if i would even start sayin how shitty my day was i just broke into tears even more.. so then i stopped crying cuz i couldnt cry and cheer it doesnt work.lol. so while i was benched for the time i just sat there and tried breathin and shit. then i did alright the first half, of course my parents and my aunt showed up and sat like right in front to watch me so i really had to make sure i didnt cry or nothing. then half time comes around and i was talkin to tiff and started crying some more... ahh it was bad... then i sucked it up again, cheered the rest of the game, and headed over to eatza pizza. so im sittin there with everyone and dan walks in holdin his ex gf's hand, and i just couldnt take it be then, so then of course i cried some more... and finally holland gave me a ride home. thank god!!! so tiff like told me like 50 times before i left that i can call her at any time if i need her, of course i wasnt gonna,lol, but just the offer was nice... so i get home get online talk to some ppl and try to calm down.. then dan IMs me and wants to talk about everything... i dont even know, i think we worked everything out, we werent both like on the same page with things, so it fucked shit up... right now i dunno, i guess we are fine. i dunno im scared of getting hurt again tho... cept i know kenz's got my back,lol...kenz 'murder is not the answer' haha.. okay... well so then after my lovely nite i finally went to sleep, and i slept till like 1 today... which was nice, cuz i really needed some sleep...
we are supposed to go to my oma and opa's house today for my opa's bday. so i shall see how that goes... well if anyone wants to do something tonite, gimme a call on my cell, ill have it with me... i love all of ya! and thanks to everyone who like put up with my psycho breakdowns yesterday! mwah!!!
--eden--
so thursday nite i find out that dan is sayin shit about me being a bitch and stuff, and i got pretty pissed. so i go into school yest mornin feelin like shit, and like i dunno i was on the verge of crying. so my eyes were watering and i just made up excuses,lol like my fave one was tellin tiff that it was windy in the hallways. haha. wow that was classic. so yeah then dan sees me a few times tries sayin hi and talkin to me, and i wasnt even in the mood to talk to him. so i just kinda didnt. then i get to english 3º and like im sittin there doin my math homework and i just break down crying, thankfully i dont think no one saw me...but yeah it sucked. so i get to lunch 5º wanting to cry again but i just kinda kept it in... then i went thru the rest of the day havin like 50 ppl askin if i was mad at dan and shit, but i tried stayin fairly happy. then i came home, slept like till 530 cuz i had a headache and was just stressed as hell. then i get up get ready, and pick up kristyn for the game at like 640. when we were supposed to be there at 630, but my sis couldnt find her keys. so we get to the field, get yelled at for being late and barth tells us we are benched for the beginning of the game. so i went to the bathroom to change into my body suit, and just broke down bawling...then i went back out to stretch and shit and just couldnt hold it in, so im sittin there bawling my eyes out havin like everyone ask if i was okay, and like im so glad all my friends care, but everyone knows how it is to just kinda wanna be left alone.like it was almost like if i would even start sayin how shitty my day was i just broke into tears even more.. so then i stopped crying cuz i couldnt cry and cheer it doesnt work.lol. so while i was benched for the time i just sat there and tried breathin and shit. then i did alright the first half, of course my parents and my aunt showed up and sat like right in front to watch me so i really had to make sure i didnt cry or nothing. then half time comes around and i was talkin to tiff and started crying some more... ahh it was bad... then i sucked it up again, cheered the rest of the game, and headed over to eatza pizza. so im sittin there with everyone and dan walks in holdin his ex gf's hand, and i just couldnt take it be then, so then of course i cried some more... and finally holland gave me a ride home. thank god!!! so tiff like told me like 50 times before i left that i can call her at any time if i need her, of course i wasnt gonna,lol, but just the offer was nice... so i get home get online talk to some ppl and try to calm down.. then dan IMs me and wants to talk about everything... i dont even know, i think we worked everything out, we werent both like on the same page with things, so it fucked shit up... right now i dunno, i guess we are fine. i dunno im scared of getting hurt again tho... cept i know kenz's got my back,lol...kenz 'murder is not the answer' haha.. okay... well so then after my lovely nite i finally went to sleep, and i slept till like 1 today... which was nice, cuz i really needed some sleep...
we are supposed to go to my oma and opa's house today for my opa's bday. so i shall see how that goes... well if anyone wants to do something tonite, gimme a call on my cell, ill have it with me... i love all of ya! and thanks to everyone who like put up with my psycho breakdowns yesterday! mwah!!!
--eden--