the same old sickly skin
This guy has been messaging me for a week now since finding me on one of the sites I frequent, asking me out, being friendly, cracking jokes, and being completely unbearable. Awhile ago I told him to shut up because I couldn't stand it anymore, and I feel disgusted with myself because he didn't deserve it.
It was cold and wet today, and I skipped going to the gym, settling for eating everything in sight. I strewed readings across my desk, highlighted a few words, and realized I couldn't do any more. I snapped at my parents for asking me to go with them to visit a cousin in the hospital who had dengue fever. My parents didn't deserve that either.
Now it's almost midnight again, and guess what comes into my mind. I'm aching just as much as that night, and I'm tired, and angry with myself myself, and feeling fat, and irrelevant, and here. Crying will help. Then I realize I only cry at the movies, when it's got nothing to do with me.
A friend is giving me a hug over YM, and it's just laughable right now.
It was cold and wet today, and I skipped going to the gym, settling for eating everything in sight. I strewed readings across my desk, highlighted a few words, and realized I couldn't do any more. I snapped at my parents for asking me to go with them to visit a cousin in the hospital who had dengue fever. My parents didn't deserve that either.
Now it's almost midnight again, and guess what comes into my mind. I'm aching just as much as that night, and I'm tired, and angry with myself myself, and feeling fat, and irrelevant, and here. Crying will help. Then I realize I only cry at the movies, when it's got nothing to do with me.
A friend is giving me a hug over YM, and it's just laughable right now.