Round Here It's Not Sane
Wow...I haven't updated in a really long time. That's what being sick does to you. I really hate being sick. It seriously pisses me off. It makes me angry at myself for "allowing" myself to become sick.
It's my favorite kind of weather out side. It's cloudy and dark. I really hope it rains. It NEEDS to rain. I LOVE the rain. The rain makes me happy; I haven't felt happy in a really long time. I want to feel 'happy' but I just can't seem to and that makes me very angry. I hate that it's been taking others to make me feel good. I can't even make mayself happy. Is that a bad thing? I WANT to be happy on my own but I just can't seem to.
Well...my birthday has come and gone. Now I'm a year older, joy of joys. People always ask you if you feel different? What's the fucking point? What are you gonna say? "Yes I woke up this morning and I was taller overnight! I had lost fifty pounds and my skin was tanned. Oh! And do you remember all that emotional baggage I had been carrying around for years? That's all gone! Wow, I feel so much different!" What a load of bullshit.
I really wanted to skip school today. I just wanted to go to a park and sit on a bench. All day. Just sit there and think... Why can't things just be that simple?
School really seems to be kicking my ass lately. I don't want to be here. I've had senioritis for 3 years, it gets worse every year. I still have a year to go! I can't be worse than this next year! I won't make it. I need to just get away...soon.
Trig is a bitch. Physics is worse. Choir is boring. French is retarded. This class, Multimedia, is a waste of my time. That is my day so far. Great, ain't it?
Maybe more later.
It's my favorite kind of weather out side. It's cloudy and dark. I really hope it rains. It NEEDS to rain. I LOVE the rain. The rain makes me happy; I haven't felt happy in a really long time. I want to feel 'happy' but I just can't seem to and that makes me very angry. I hate that it's been taking others to make me feel good. I can't even make mayself happy. Is that a bad thing? I WANT to be happy on my own but I just can't seem to.
Well...my birthday has come and gone. Now I'm a year older, joy of joys. People always ask you if you feel different? What's the fucking point? What are you gonna say? "Yes I woke up this morning and I was taller overnight! I had lost fifty pounds and my skin was tanned. Oh! And do you remember all that emotional baggage I had been carrying around for years? That's all gone! Wow, I feel so much different!" What a load of bullshit.
I really wanted to skip school today. I just wanted to go to a park and sit on a bench. All day. Just sit there and think... Why can't things just be that simple?
School really seems to be kicking my ass lately. I don't want to be here. I've had senioritis for 3 years, it gets worse every year. I still have a year to go! I can't be worse than this next year! I won't make it. I need to just get away...soon.
Trig is a bitch. Physics is worse. Choir is boring. French is retarded. This class, Multimedia, is a waste of my time. That is my day so far. Great, ain't it?
Maybe more later.