This feels like high school
8 bio lectures down. 5 to go. I'm kicking ass.
And I'm actually enjoying Jane Eyre, despite what Leon said about it. Maybe hell week won't be so hellish after all.
On an entirely different note, I saw my psychiatrist today. I see her about once a month, and she fools around with giving me anti-depressants. I've been all over the map, trying to find one that works for me without side effects. (Zoloft made me feel just fine, except it stole my sex drive, and I refused to put up with that; paxil seemed to wear off and yet I'm back on it. The list goes on...)
What was strange, though, is that I've been pretty happy lately. A little stressed, but extremely content. Life is grand. Yea, I love life. Let's celebrate life and so forth. But then I started talking about my relationship with Caroline and a few other friends, and it really hit me hard. I had to fight back tears, since I had a class immediately following the appointment.
Not only that, she was just asking, "So, how are things going?" She isn't a counselor. She just prescribes pills and makes sure that they won't kill me. But I used her like she was a counselor. I felt like I had all these things in the back of my mind that I had been ignoring for the past month, and I finally had the chance to vent. It didn't make me feel better, though.
So I've shoved everything into the background. Foreground: homework, classes, family, Leon. It's much easier this way.
And I'm actually enjoying Jane Eyre, despite what Leon said about it. Maybe hell week won't be so hellish after all.
On an entirely different note, I saw my psychiatrist today. I see her about once a month, and she fools around with giving me anti-depressants. I've been all over the map, trying to find one that works for me without side effects. (Zoloft made me feel just fine, except it stole my sex drive, and I refused to put up with that; paxil seemed to wear off and yet I'm back on it. The list goes on...)
What was strange, though, is that I've been pretty happy lately. A little stressed, but extremely content. Life is grand. Yea, I love life. Let's celebrate life and so forth. But then I started talking about my relationship with Caroline and a few other friends, and it really hit me hard. I had to fight back tears, since I had a class immediately following the appointment.
Not only that, she was just asking, "So, how are things going?" She isn't a counselor. She just prescribes pills and makes sure that they won't kill me. But I used her like she was a counselor. I felt like I had all these things in the back of my mind that I had been ignoring for the past month, and I finally had the chance to vent. It didn't make me feel better, though.
So I've shoved everything into the background. Foreground: homework, classes, family, Leon. It's much easier this way.