in the future there will be no car stereos.
i didn't think i would sleep decently last night, but i did. my eyes were hurting. that's why i feel rejuvenated.
last night me and guirdex spoke on the phone for almost 2 horas i think. we talked about our days. and then we kind of laid there in silence for a while. he calls it an "interesting silence." its cool. i swear sometimes we could have a whole conversation of "yeah" and "cool".
i pulled out my latest issue of essence mag (the one with eva on the cover) and told what black men were supposed to want. eh. it was amusing, at least.
later we started talking about serious shit.
like our relationship. and how we are feeling so dependent on the existence of each other. and how it would really hurt us if the other could not be in this relationship any more.
like money. because his father is a cab driver. and i kind of started to cry because i dunno. this is becoming kind of real. but just how i really feel about all of this. and what i want and stuff. and the limits to the compromises i can make. i told he had to be in school. not that he wouldn't be, but just how serious i was about it. about how much it meant to me, and about how serious my parents were about all of it.
like how he feels to be the older one (he's 26) and how he doesn't quite have all of his shit together, but how he wants to.
i told him i have to see him somehow in sept. i just have to. i'm going to go into work late tonight, so that i can finish going through all of the pictures from my camera. there are some on there as old as like the middle of last semester!
last night me and guirdex spoke on the phone for almost 2 horas i think. we talked about our days. and then we kind of laid there in silence for a while. he calls it an "interesting silence." its cool. i swear sometimes we could have a whole conversation of "yeah" and "cool".
i pulled out my latest issue of essence mag (the one with eva on the cover) and told what black men were supposed to want. eh. it was amusing, at least.
later we started talking about serious shit.
like our relationship. and how we are feeling so dependent on the existence of each other. and how it would really hurt us if the other could not be in this relationship any more.
like money. because his father is a cab driver. and i kind of started to cry because i dunno. this is becoming kind of real. but just how i really feel about all of this. and what i want and stuff. and the limits to the compromises i can make. i told he had to be in school. not that he wouldn't be, but just how serious i was about it. about how much it meant to me, and about how serious my parents were about all of it.
like how he feels to be the older one (he's 26) and how he doesn't quite have all of his shit together, but how he wants to.
i told him i have to see him somehow in sept. i just have to. i'm going to go into work late tonight, so that i can finish going through all of the pictures from my camera. there are some on there as old as like the middle of last semester!