A Public Service Announcement
This is a warning to all residents of the greater Lansing area, and indeed, the world. There is a creature out there, recently discovered by an unsuspecting retirement center employee, that may well pose a threat to the human race. As Josh Holloway was taking out some trash at the end of his shift, he saw what appeared at first glance to be a full trash bag sitting on top of the dumpster. However, once he threw a bag into the dumpster, the creature revealed itself. Experts are unsure whether this is evidence of a natural camouflage the beast has evolved, or just ignorance on the part of the witness. Either way, the creature wasted no time in leaping from its perch and attacking the poor dolt, who barely escaped with his life. Below is an artist's rendition if the animal, shown in its only known natural habitat. But be warned, what follows may disturb you.
