(log) Blinded to see the cruelty of the Beast, it is the darker side of me (Active/Closed)

[bitter_inferno]

Name(s): Godot, Ashelia (closed)
Location: Godot's cafe office
Content: Apology time and a meeting of minds
Week: 32
Time: Saturday morning
Rating: PG-13?

Comments

[bitter_inferno]

The knock resounded in Godot's mind a moment before the significance of the sound registered. He stood, walking past the magical source from which rose the rich sound of muggle jazz and the row of beloved coffee machines, beans and blends. His hand rested on the cool metal of the door handle before the drew was drawn open to reveal the woman he'd wronged so thoroughly. "Lady Dalmasca," Godot said in formal greeting, not sure of the details of her heritage beyond "pure blood" and the rumours of her parents' murder. His research had not been entirely exhaustive, but such was his own fault.

Inclining his head towards the overstuffed, cream-coloured armchairs, Godot pulled the door open to indicate she was welcome to enter and sit. "I've kept you waiting." Too long to answer the door; perhaps. To apologise? Most certainly. Any body of water left too long would go stagnant. Movement was the very essence of life. Waiting is a fatal poison, came the bitter reminder from the dark depths of his mind. That was another issue with Ashelia Dalmasca, he mused, walking to his coffee machines and leaving the door open. If he could earn her confidence, perhaps this conversation could also spare her his fate.

"Coffee?" It was hardly a question - he was preparing two steaming mugs to brace them both as it was. "I have been fine tuning a new blend. Rich and dark as the night, intensity lightened with the fresh beams of hope."

Actually it tasted a bit like hazelnuts and dark chocolate alongside the blackest of life bloods. The finest blends were culinary works of art, after all.

apologies for the delayed novel >>a

[nethiciteashe]

Ashe wasn’t kept waiting very long, but it was long enough to make her nervous about coming again. By the time the door was finally pulled open, Ashe’s arms were folded tightly across her chest and her expression was business-like. Professor Ashelia will do, thank you, was her automatic response whenever someone referred to her by her last name, though this time she didn’t say anything about it. If Professor Godot felt the need to actually use her name, there was no way she would give him an excuse to call her anything else. Much as she disliked the way her last name sounded at times, particularly combined with the title ‘Professor,’ she had to admit that it was a step up from ‘Coward.’

“Thank you, professor.”

The Transfiguration professor didn’t pause long in the doorway, allowing her arms to fall to her sides as she stepped into the office. It certainly smelled enough like that damnable drink he was so obsessed with. She could see the coffee pots brewing more of that drink and sighed inwardly, figuring she would have to drink a full mug before he would allow her to leave. She didn’t hate coffee, but she definitely preferred tea. Regardless, she nodded to his question.

“It would be appreciated.” Who would appreciate it more, though, was the question? Would she, as he offered her something to quench her thirst, or would he, as she accepted his drink of choice when anyone knew she preferred something else?

And did it really matter in the long run?

Ashe shook herself inwardly before offering Godot a slightly softer expression as she took the mug when it was offered to her, sipping. “I believe you have found a good one.” Her words were truth. She did like hazelnut. After her first sip, she lowered her arms slightly, still holding the mug between them (more to give herself something to hold onto than anything else), and let her eyes meet his face. She couldn’t exactly meet his eyes since that mask was in the way, but this was as good as it got.

“I believe you asked to speak with me?”

My mighty heart is broken XDDD <3

[bitter_inferno]

Godot's expression remained somber as he sunk into one of the chairs, free of the usual grin that varied from anything between cheeky and cruel. There was a beat after she spoke, the very barest of smiles tugging at his lips as she complimented the coffee before the more serious air returned. "I did." Pausing, he took a long draw of his coffee. He needed it. For a man like Godot, apologies did not come easily. And yet, this must be done.

"I wanted to apologise." Another pause, another sip of coffee, and now his elbow was propped up on the arm of his chair. Pull yourself together. Are you a man or an infant? "I reacted too personally to the werewolf incident. You didn't deserve the foul brew you were handed. The situation was challenging enough without a demon at you shoulder." Godot bowed his head a little. "Even more so because of the events of last week."

Complicated words were nothing here; a metaphor would only leave a bad taste in his mouth. Contrary to popular belief, Godot was a man who could appreciate simplicity, so long as it was sincere. This was nothing if not sincere."I'm sorry."

pffft XD - have another novel to patch it up :P

[nethiciteashe]

Ashe noticed the smile tugging at his lips and felt nerves clash with pride, though she didn’t let either show. Maybe they really were getting somewhere, though that all depended on the type of smile he had been about to give her. She didn’t rush him, though, knowing that if someone tried to rush her through something, they’d likely get their ears yelled off. So in an attempt to be courteous, Ashe waited for him to speak again.

When her colleague finally did, Ashe’s eyes widened in surprise and her grip tightened on the mug she had just been sipping from. Had Godot really just…? She couldn’t believe her ears and blinked up at him, sure she had been mistaken. But, no… he was continuing in his explanation. He was really apologizing to her…

She managed to pull herself back together just in time to answer. “You did have a point with the werewolf,” she conceded, “or at least a partial point. I have, however, taken care of that to the best of my ability. He has not had a relapse since.” Her eyes attempted to gauge a reaction from behind that visor of his, but once again such a feat was difficult, and so she eventually left it alone, preferring to sip her coffee and figure out how to respond to this sudden apology.

“We all were given an unsatisfactory mug,” Ashe continued, speaking carefully, though she used one of the phrases she’d noticed he liked using in an attempt to either humor him or show him that she was serious as well and attempting to bridge the gap between them. It would take quite a while to completely undo all the damage that had been done, but Ashe trusted Mia… If the Ravenclaw Ghost was so taken with him, there had to be a damn good reason why.

“I suppose we could each have handled such things better during that week, but-” And here came the kicker. Ashe supposed she had every reason to dislike Godot after all that, but she couldn’t help thinking that last week… really hadn’t been his fault. She couldn’t blame him for the results of a spell, no matter how much the words had stung. “-but I cannot fault you for what was said during that time. I won’t say your words haven’t hurt, but I will give you the benefit of the doubt for last week.”

That was about all she was willing to offer him at the moment. She would accept an apology for the rest of what he had said this year, but it would take quite a lot for her to trust him again.

\o/ YOU ARE A MIRACLE WORKER! XD Kudos for the epic tag, man |D

[bitter_inferno]

Her tensing was noticed, and while he could appreciate her subtlety, her tendency not to wear her heart on her sleeve, Godot was still observant enough to note the way his words made her react and be regretful of it. But enough of that, for now at least; he had hours to feel regretful, and possibly only now to try and apologise, try to urge her hand.

"I'm glad to hear it," Godot offered in response, genuinely. At the same time, however, he was restless, shifting in his seat. “A partial point does not mean you should drive the stake home when the target's heart has yet to be proven unbeating. That doesn't allow you to protect people from vampires; you simply become a threat in your own right.”

His mouth flickered again in a slight smile. An unsatisfactory mug? "That is an understatement," he said, although his tone was kinder than it had ever been in the past when they had spoken. "Sometimes it seems our setting is even more overpowering than my blend 112 left overnight." Blend 112: a beverage so overpowering, that sometimes even Godot's stomach ached a little from drinking it. His amusement, however, quickly faded as he considered her words. It wasn't right that she let it go so easily. It wasn't a sign of cowardice, by any stretch of the imagination, but in some way he must be held accountable.

"Even the diseased fruit does not fall far from the tree. I had spoken harsh words to you before. The scalding beverage thrown in your face was not so different from the bitter mugs I had handed you prior. For that I am sorry." He was silent a moment, not drinking his coffee but instead resting his fingertips against his mask for a few minutes. His coffee might cool, but it was no matter; there was far more pressing a matter at hand.

"There is another bridge needing to be crossed," Godot started, finally leaning back in his chair after the extended silence. "However, sometimes the unfamiliar traveler can be hesitant to step into uncharted territory." He gave her a slightly sad, self mocking smile. "And the only one familiar with the terrain has proved himself a troll before." Inwardly frustrated, he lifted his mug to his lips, hesitating before he took a sip. "I think there are some matter on which you could use guidance," came the carefully measured continuation. Best not overpower with an over-concentrated blend. He sighed, and raised his hand to his mask. "You don't know a great deal about me. I prefer wandering in foggy streets to clear pastures. Still," Godot said, looking directly at her. "Still. There are things you need to know, if only to save you trapsing the same streets as myself. You don't need to trust me. Just listen to me."

The final part of his speech was unspoken, but the atmosphere was heavy as he watched her from behind the sanctuary of his mask. For Merlin's sake, listen.

YOURS WAS MORE EPIC

[nethiciteashe]

Honestly, Ashe had no idea what Godot was talking about with the whole vampire thing and her expression showed it, but she kept quiet about it at the moment, not wanting to cause more confusion by not understanding whatever the heck he was trying to say. Instead, she focused on the rest of what he was saying, attempting to see through his metaphors, an endeavor she’d never been particularly good at. Mentioning the blend just served to irritate her as she had absolutely NO idea what that meant. Holding herself together, she took another sip of the coffee in her hand, feeling a little like she would gladly escape this room if she had the opportunity.

She didn’t quite know how to respond to his apology, gaze sliding downwards as she turned over what he was saying. A part of her was still tense, still ready to hear the new accusations, but she didn’t show it, preferring not to let him know he had her feeling anything but calm. He’d taken advantage of her nerves and feelings before. She wasn’t going to let him do that again.

All the following talk of trolls and territory had Ashe on the defensive. Not knowing what exactly he was talking about made her even more wary than normal, though she’d been that way the whole time. Her gaze lifted to his mask then as her expression contracted and she grumbled inwardly about the fact that he hid himself so thoroughly behind that mask. She couldn’t even gather visual clues from whatever he was saying.

However frustrated she was with him, Ashe knew she had to at least listen. If she didn’t, she’d be leaving herself wide open to more accusations and torment. “I hope you’ll forgive me for being uncertain of how to react,” she began carefully, still looking at his mask where she thought his eyes should be. “I am unsure what you would have to explain to me, but I am willing to listen.” With any luck, he’d just give her whatever story he wanted to tell and then leave her alone about it. She wasn’t sure how much more of this she could take.

8DDDD

[bitter_inferno]

Godot sighed. "It's a complicated lesson. There is no need to dress it up with frills and blossoms enough to make a Rococo painting of it."
No. There was no whimsy to this. There was a story to be told, but it was no merry stroll in the park, and lathering it in paints that would only crack and peel in time would do no good. Further steps would be necessary.

"To know a man, the first thing you need to do is know his name and look him in the eye." It had always been a favourite tact, hadn't it? Looking into the eye of his opponent. "If you don't know a man, then his words mean nothing." It was a much a way to brace himself as to warn her. He had already found himself without his mask; Shalice, Sasuke, Winry. Kitten. To remove the mask was to remove Godot and lay Diego Armando bare for the world to see. If that could prevent Ashelia Dalmasca from wrapping herself in a mask, then it was worth the exposure, he reminded himself. His coffee cup rested on the table they shared, with a quiet thud of ceramic meeting wood. It was soon followed by the sound of metal.

"My name is Diego Armando," he said calmly, looking Ashe straight in the face for all his blindness.

"The story I have to tell you is a simple one. A man, well aware of his talents and working at a top London law firm, and a young woman." Diego paused to reach for his coffee cup, smiling just barely. "Equally talented. A kitten eager to show her claws and make it into the fray. You would think that such a pair had all the time in the world, would you not?" He could not see, but he looked at her intently. "Youth, success and strong wills on each their sides." Tapping the side of his mug, he let his gaze slip away from her face. "Lady Luck, however, saw fit to deal them a darker hand than that."

There was a pause. Coffee was needed, and swiftly. A good half-mug was poured down his throat before he spoke again. "Lady Luck and a viper with a near-fatal bite. Enough to steal live years of a man's life." Trapped in Hell with nothing but a scorching blaze for company. He pushed his hand through the shock of white hair that looked completely alien against bronzed skin and black eyebrows. "Five years and his eyes, all to be met with the news that the woman he loved was dead when he awoke."

Diego was silent for a long time, listening to the sound of his own breathing and biting back the tide of emotions that threatened to rush him.

"Time waits for no one. If you never listen to another word I say, hear that. Time waits for no one."

[nethiciteashe]

Ashe took in Godot's lesson as she could digest it. So many thoughts were wheeling around in her head as he spoke, giving her a new name, a past she hadn't even thought of... and the past of a friend she had never known about. Mia had never spoken of the dark details of her life outside Hogwarts and Ashe had never asked. She'd known Mia had been a lawyer, but Ashe had been so distracted with her own life, with Rangiku and teaching, that she hadn't thought to ask about how things were going for Mia.

Now that she knew, she'd begun to regret not being there for her older friend more, but a lot of that had taken place while she was still in school. Even though she couldn't have had much of a chance to keep contact, she still felt badly that she hadn't at least made enough of an effort. Maybe if she had, she could have offered more support than she'd given for Mia. Losing someone close like that couldn't have been easy.

Ashe's eyes widened slightly as her head ducked down momentarily. It seemed Godot, Diego or whatever he wanted to be known as, was trying to tell her not to follow the path he and Mia had taken. And honestly, Ashe didn't want to lose Rangiku. This situation was mostly her fault by now and she was afraid of losing Rangiku, who was like a rock for her.

"...I'm sorry," she offered after a while, lifting her head so she could offer a sorrowful glance. He'd know she had realized who he meant by 'woman he loved.' Mia was a close friend after all.

And now she didn't know quite how to answer. She knew he wouldn't want pity or sympathy. He wasn't offering her the story for that kind of result. He wanted her to go out and do something about it. And she knew she needed to do that.

"I have a little explaining to do, then," she murmured, glancing at the door. Maybe then we can avoid your fate. He looked so different without his mask... but maybe she looked different without her mental one.

"...Thank you." It was all she could offer now.

[bitter_inferno]

The past dragged at Diego, threatened to drown him, like a chain about his neck. Sometimes it felt like all he could do was struggle air, fight against the mass of water pressing against his chest and use up all his energy just to breath.

He didn't know how Mia felt, exactly. In honesty he had been too afraid to ask. His brow furrowed at the thought. There was no way he could leave that uncorrected. When he was so unprepared himself, he would have had no hesitation in brushing away Ashelia's concerns. It was impossible for her to have known. He had known all too well.

"Don't apologize when you're not at fault," he replied, almost automatically, though it lacked the usual blunt delivery he'd become famed for. Diego couldn't see the glance, but he'd considered exactly what kind of person Ashelia Dalmasca was carefully in recent times. He didn't know, but he knew, and offered her a sad smile in turn before taking another sip of coffee. Burning and bitter, just as himself.

"There's quite a way to walk." Diego swirled the coffee in his cup, his other arm hanging over the back of his chair. "No footwear in the world will prepare you for all the terrain you'll have to cross." A nostalgic air rarely heard entered his voice as he continued. "Help each other, though, and the view will always be beautiful. No matter how hard it rains or how rocky the road." There, he sighed. All the plans for the road he'd had for himself and Mia had been cast aside, but at least they could still journey together. "As long as you have a partner you can rely on, you'll be fine."

Diego had bowed his head, but now he looked back at her. "Anytime." He meant it.

[nethiciteashe]

Ashe blinked a little at Godot’s first reply, but made no move to correct or question. If he was going to tell her she wasn’t at fault or that she shouldn’t apologize, she’d be a fool to question it. The smile was returned as Ashe attempted to see through to the man underneath the mask that lay on the table. All throughout this meeting, he had shown her a different person than the one she’d thought she knew, but now she could see why he’d been like that… even if she wasn’t fond of the way he’d gone about making his beliefs clear.

“I shall keep this in mind…” She wasn’t used to having someone who would journey with her, especially now after everything she’d done and said to Rangiku, but she knew that Godot was right. If they were to get through this, she and Rangiku would need to face up to their feelings… or rather she would especially. She couldn’t hide behind her fear any longer.

Ashe hesitated slightly before reaching up to rest a hand on Godot’s arm, a silent comfort and apology. “If there is one thing I have learned, it is that we all must help each other.” And then a thought occurred to her and she wondered why she hadn’t come across it before. “I know how much Mia means to you. Rangiku and I created a spell earlier in the year. It’s not a very consistent one, unfortunately, but it would give you the chance to see her solid whenever you and see desired.” She didn’t know how he would take the offer, but in her heart, it was an offer of friendship. Mia was, and had always been, a friend to Ashe. She knew how much the spell meant to her. The question was if Godot would take this as her being friendly or offering out of pity.

baaaaw sorry for the slow

[bitter_inferno]

"Do that." Godot rose from his seat, gently letting Ashelia's hand from his arm. It was not a brush off, and he took care to make that apparent with slow movements before he easily made his way to his coffee machine. His throat was feeling cool and dry - a burning mug of Hell's finest brew was exactly the solution for that, even if it wouldn't melt away all the doubts and pains lingering. "You're right," he admitted, and it was not without some hoarseness in his voice. He bowed his head. Exactly what else was going to come tumbling down next to his misplaced pride and accusations?

"I know the spell," he managed finally, staring blindly into his cup of coffee, steam rising against his face. "I should have thanked you for it," he admitted, and sighed a little as he rubbed his forehead. "Diego Armando used to be a classy guy," came a slightly more upbeat tone. "I should start spending a little more time with Mia. After all, a wise man once said that our best friends bring out the best in ourselves." He smiled a little. "He didn't say much else that wasn't worth throwing out with last nights coffee grind, but at least that was a good one."

Diego shook his head. Was he turning into an old man that told pointless stories, like an idiot judge with no judgment to be seen? "I'd appreciate the spell, as long as we figure out something I can do in return."

like I have any room to talk XD

[nethiciteashe]

Ashe shook her head a little at Godot's mention of thanking her, but she didn't know what else to say. This whole conversation had been more than she had expected and she was a little taken aback by everything he'd admitted. To her, this warning, the conversation itself, had been enough of a return favor for her to be going on with. However, she understood the need to do something in return for someone's kindness, so she didn't brush off his offer. Instead, she nodded once.

"If something comes to mind, I will let you know," she murmured. "There is no thanks needed for me, though. I believe we have each done something for the other so far... Now, though..." She paused and glanced away for a moment, gathering up her thoughts. The time had come to go speak with Rangiku. That much was certain.

"I believe another discussion is in my future and I need to take care of it. I thank you for your help and... hope that we may accord each other a respectful relationship now." With those words, she offered a hand to shake should he want it. The gesture was of a respectful truce and as much forgiveness as Ashe was likely to be able to put forward.