(Untitled)

[drivenbyblood]

WHO: Raikou and Gau (Closed).
LOCATION: Hogwarts's gardens.
WEEK: 65
TIME: Thursday morning. Might as well be at that point with how late it is. D8
WHAT: The two are meeting for the first time since Raikou's imprisonment in Azkaban. (Additional Info: Because of a long chain of events (check out both of their histories), Raikou accidentally

Comments

[cakebakenojutsu]

Gau was busy in his mad scramble to the gardens. What Raikou looked like was the least of his concerns so far. Just the fact that Raikou was coming--and much too soon for him...that was enough to send deep tendrils of paranoia into his hardworking little brain.

He robe snagged in a hinge on the way out, stopping him with a jerk. He pulled the thing free, with a grumble. Everything else was fairly ordinary to him in this uniform, except the robe. Long things like that were so impractical. Just traditions at work, he supposed. But...really, he didn't have time for supposing. he took off again at a run, garnering a few stares, and even a snigger or two as he passed.

Gau Meguro was not known for his athleticism after all, and the scar in his chest burned with the deep breaths, the skin around it warping, and twisting with each heave as he tore his way over to the gardens without a scrap of dignity.

Not that it would matter, Gau noted grimly. Raikou was probably going ot kill him. He was probably hurt. And if half of what Gau had read about Azkaban (another shiver) was true, then he, Gau Meguro, was probably responsible for the loss of a number of happy memories from Raikou's head. Gone entirely. Irreplacable.

Nothing scared Gau half as much in the wizarding world as the thought of memory charms, really. The thought of losing what you knew...

He skidded his way to the gardens, scrambling around, digging his hands throught he dirt as fast as he could to try to prepare everything.

Raikou was coming.

[drivenbyblood]

While he had lost a few memories, Raikou had been able to avoid the worst of the Dementors' hunger. He had found that if one followed orders and kept out of trouble, they weren't particularly interested in that prisoner. Though he probably had the other, more rowdy, prisoners to thank for that respite.

Even though he walked slowly to the gardens, he arrived way before he expected. Thus he paused at the entryway to the gardens, gathering his courage to face Gau. Any moment now, the boy would surely reject him for good and...

He would be alone again. Nothing would have changed. He had told himself that he would have to accept that Gau would never be at his side again. But.

But...

That little word caused his heart to ache. He wanted to see him again - if only from afar. Gau was much closer to him than his own sister. Regardless of how this went, it would hurt.

Finally, he stepped into the garden and found...

"Gau." he murmured, his voice barely audible.

Pff~ I wrote half of this while you were writing yours. *Gau rubs efficiency off just a little*

[cakebakenojutsu]

There's someone in the dirt, digging feverishly, panting audibly as they do so. Even from behind, it will probably take a while before Raikou will even realize it's him.

Granted, that was the thing with Gau, after all. He was brilliant with housework, and sloughed away at it without complaint, but...find a job that was actually dirty, and there was instant comedy to be had as Gau would try to dispatch his work, hindered by a desire not to get a scrap of soot or dirt on him.

And yet, this person is there, clawing at and digging up the soil with his hands, bent on his knees, working feverishly. And behind him, there's a small, steady, slightly wilty growing row of Red Spider Amaryllis, a crop of the blooms with their bulb-roots exposed right next to him, and his worn-heeled shoes, pathced in the soles with cardboard because even before, Gau was tightfisted with his money as any Scot.

Gau places another in the dirt, then fumbles with a muddied hand for his wand.

"A-Aquaminty?" He ventures. The wand gives a little fizzle, and Gau gives a squeak as the flower goes a lovely pale shade of turqiouse. "No, no, no, no, NO!" the boy moans, rubbing a streak of dirt across one cheek without meaning, hitting his wand a little.

(There's dirt under him, probably all over the knees of his pants...dirt all over him...and the knot of his tie is loose...so unlike him...)

"that's not...uh...Aguamenti!" He mutters with a jerk, but the gesture runs too sharply, and the ensuing splash of water knocks the bloom down like a knife. Gau gives another noise of horror, murmuring ineffecitve, malfunctioning spells as he goes, looking closer to panicked tears than anything.

He can't concentrate, he can't remember the things he's been packing steadily into his head over the past week. All he can think of is the dull lingering panic that Raikou's coming, and that he can't get the man's favorite flowers set up fast enough.

But he's there, clawing at the earth, trying to put the flowers in it as fast as he can, trying to coax them to take root, to be there, like it might change everything, like they might actually fix this.

He's so intent in his task (or...perhaps it's that Raikou still moves like a ghost) that he doesn't notice him, wrestling with the dirt, unheeding his raw fingers.

Well...doens't notice him at first. Until he hears teh name and jumps. His name.

He freezes, eyes first--absurdly enough--on the sandals. Even the sight of those sandals is nearly enough to stop his heart. (Ah, yes, the sandals. Raikou would wear sandals in the dead of winter in the snow.)

His gaze creeps upwards, caught in the act, caught being inadequate. He feels thirteen again, voice dead in his throat before he remembers it--the familiar syllables.

"Mister Raikou..." He whispers, numb with recognition, with fmailiarity, with HOME all in screaming capitals across two pages of the notebook of his brain--underlines underneath, and stars, and tags denoting importance...

He's so much thinner, paler, gaunter than he remembered. The sad eyes are sadder. But it's Raikou.

His face is as frozen as the rest of him before he hears his voice blurt out, too sharp, too-nasal as ever, "What are you wearing?"

You're amazing. Accept it. 8D

[drivenbyblood]

The sight of Gau digging in the dirt might have been comical if it hadn't gone so against the boy's nature. Raikou could tell that the boy was desperate, but he didn't understand why. It was only after he glanced at what Gau was doing that the pieces clicked together.

Amaryllis blossoms. Spider lilies. The flowers of...

The Shimizu family.

He had remembered and...here he was, going through hell to get them planted for him. Raikou realized that what he expected out of Gau was completely wrong. This was...an offering. But for what? Could it be that Gau didn't blame him for -

No. He couldn't allow himself to hope. If one hoped in the presence of Dementors, they would take it away. That was their nature.

I'm not around Dementors. He reminded himself. But, just as quickly as he tried to make himself understand that, he wondered why he felt so cold and empty. There had to be a reason for that.

And the reason was right in front of him. Gau was the missing piece in his life. Gau was his warmth.

"Raikou." he admonished softly, glancing pointedly at the flowers, "Are those for me?" he knew they were, "I..." his eyebrows rose in unison, "Gau?"

Before he knew it, he was smiling. The familiarity behind the words was enough to chase most of his nerves away.

"Does it matter?" he stepped forward, but he didn't get too close. Instead, he chose to sit on a bench.

"How...are you?" Raikou wasn't sure how to phrase what he meant. He wanted to know about Gau's physical and mental well-being. More than anything.

Hauh. *squirms and doesn't want to accept anything like that* T_T

[cakebakenojutsu]

Gau bit back his retort. Literally bit it back. He drew blood from his lip without realizing. He wanted to scream at him. Wanted to do something. Raikou, against all logic was sitting on a bench. Raikou, against all logic was smiling at him. And he knew him well enough to know Raikou could smile whenever he wanted, no matter what he was really feeling.

Gau gritted his teeth, and stopped digging. His fingers faintly throbbed as he gripped a handful of his robes, still sitting formal-style after all of this.

Do you even remember holding your hand out to me in the snow?

"I'm..."

He stopped, shook his head grimly, switching to Japanese out of inner paranoia and that little link--that thing both of them shared: blood. "It doesn't matter. I'm here to settle things between myself and Raikou-san."

He bowed his head. "I misled Raikou-san unintentionally. Raikou-san rescued me because I was a muggle. But...I was a wizard the same as him. And out of ignorance or not, I kept this from him."

He lifted his hand a little. "Headmaster found me a loan from the Wizarding bank, and bought me a wand." A strange, wan little smile, still not looking at Raikou, not daring to look at him and that held-in anger he just knew had to be there...

He shifted the wand to the side a little, then reached into his robe pocket, remembering. "You've lost weight." He said a little bluntly, tugging out a handkerchiefed bundle, and whispering something with his wand, floating the little bundle to Raikou. It opened in his lap--honeycakes. "Just like before, only...this time I made them better. Knowing how to control my magic means..." He swallowed. "That is...I did use magic on them before. Even if I didn't realize..."

He swallowed harder. "Raikou-san showed me nothing but kindness, and I repaid him with deception."

Gau mustered his courage, and tugged at his tie. "I thought...if I called you here, I could maybe make things a little bit better. I could offer you restitution, even if it could never be enough for the cost of your memories. And a place like this..." he faltered. "This time you could run, and not be caught."

He raised his chin, exposing his throat, eyes tightly shut. "I'll accept the rest of my punishment now, Mister Raikou. For what happened to you all because of me."

/pouts forever ;_;

[drivenbyblood]

Raikou closed his eyes, letting Gau's voice wash over him. After everything that had happened between them, Gau's innocent mistake seemed insignificant. Of course, he would have liked to know Gau could do magic before the issues with Raimei, but that didn't matter.

What mattered was how he had transgressed against the boy in front of him. He needed to apologize; he needed to hold out his arms and hold Gau like he wanted to on the night that he had almost lost him. But Raikou wasn't skilled at these sorts of things. He was much better at hiding his feelings - no matter how surprising they were.

"Gau, no." he shifted, "I was the one who failed you."

The honeycakes surprised him, but... That was so very like Gau. Even when he was obviously hurting in more ways than could possibly be verbalized, Gau thought of him first. How could a selfish person like Raikou possibly deserve such a friend?

Setting the honeycakes aside for the moment, Raikou rose from the bench and closed the distance between them. As soon as Gau exposed his throat, he sighed. What followed was a true testament of just how much Raikou cared about Gau.

At first, it was a mere touch to Gau's upper arms. Raikou squeezed them gently before moving even closer. Carefully and cautiously, he wrapped his arms around Gau, holding the boy as if he were the most precious being in the entire world.

And, to Raikou, he was.

*tickling charm will cheer you up right away, oh yes*

[cakebakenojutsu]

Gau blinked, shifting in surprise.

When he'd been ready to let Raikou take another try at killing him, he hadn't expected him to gently try to asphyxiate him with his torso.

He blushed, and hated himself for doing so. (Stupid word! Torso of all things...) He was going to confusedly try to reach to hug something less awkward than what was easily in reach when he remembered the dirt on his hands, and felt dreadful.

He remained a moment with his arms stupidly out, before lowering them, still feeling awkward. "Uh." He muttered into the cloth over his face, chancing a shifting of position to crane his neck up at Raikou, confusion in every inch of his face.

There was still that smudge of dirt on his cheek.

I love those! /squee

[drivenbyblood]

There was a long pause before Raikou even tried to explain. Raising one hand to touch the back of Gau's head, he stepped back, giving them both room to breathe.

"I want to ask for your forgiveness, Gau." his expression was utterly conflicted, the deepest sadness in his eyes, "If you can give it to me, that is all I will ask of you. But if you can't then...I understand." he smiled faintly, hiding the agonizing ache in his heart.

He wanted more - so much more. But he had lost the right to ask for those things the moment his blade had touched Gau's chest.

Justice prevails~

[cakebakenojutsu]

Gau blinked, startled. The awkward guardedness vanished.

He wants...?

If Raikou was asking for something like that, that meant he probably didn't remember, but...

He was still asking, so maybe he remembered...a little?

Maybe they were still friends?

A little smile cracked hopefully onto Gau's face, bloodied, muddied hands curling into the sleeves of Raikou's rather ridiculous taste in robes.

"You can't forgive justice. What I did, I did knowing what might happen to me, even if it was the best way to get Mister Raikou what he really wanted." He lowered his head. "Your sister isn't here, though, is she? I did something wrong, and made you suffer. If I'd known, I would have testified, and maybe you wouldn't have had to go to Azkaban."

His fingers tightened. "But she's not here, and I miscalculated, and hurt Mister Raikou instead." His voice lowered. "I didn't mean to."

"If I could make that up to you, Mister Raikou, that would be fine." He swallowed. "Aah...but..." Another nervous little jump of his throat--"If I can be forgiven, I'd want to be by Raikou-san's side, and help him."

He let his forehead drop against Raikou's stomach. "That would make me...really happy--being by Mr. Raikou's side again."

Usually does. 8D

[drivenbyblood]

His choice of clothing was always ridiculous, but, what Gau didn't know was that Raikou was a huge fan of comfortable clothing. He didn't particularly care about the color or if it matched with the other comfortable articles of clothing he had chosen. In that way - and probably in others - Raikou was very much a child. It was a wonder that the Headmaster hadn't laughed him out of his office, really.

Gau's answer, however, surprised him more than his clothes probably surprised his fellow Professors.

Justice. Gau had forgiven him because of what Raikou had told him about justice. A small, slightly unhinged sound left his lips. How could Gau believe that friends would treat one another like that? Raikou had no intention whatsoever of following through on those words.

"You didn't deserve to be punished. I would have been mad at you, but I wouldn't have cut you."

And that was the truth. That was how Raikou had felt that day.

"I'm not angry at you." he raised his hand and brushed away the dirt smudge on Gau's cheek, "I was afraid that you wouldn't want to..." his eyes widened, unsure if he heard Gau correctly.

Did he...? Really?

"If that's your decision then...please...let me make a pledge to you." he licked his lips nervously before lowering himself onto his knees, "I will never again use my katana or my wand to harm you. Even if I am angered, you need not worry about suffering that pain again."

Oh gosh. I forgot who we're playing. XD Yes, yes, it usually does, doesn't it?

[cakebakenojutsu]

But Gau's eyebrows knit together. He pushed away Raikou by the stomach, leaving a smudgy handprint, turning back to his flowers, still valiantly trying to plant the things, stubbornly wrestling with the ground.

"...Mister Raikou shouldn't make promises he can't keep. Even if it's only once." Gau mutttered, chewing his bleeding lip, frowning at the ground as he coned soil over each bulb, planting them too shallowly without noticing, the soil still too dry, the sunlight still too direct--he wasn't much of a gardener.

" 'If you say anything, I will raise my sword and my wand against you.' " he repeated. "These were the terms of my promise to you, Mister Raikou, and I offered myself up for them to be kept." he frowned deeply, that black-and-white idealistic view of his coloring in.

"You shouldn't make me make promises you don't want to keep. Even saying that before..."

Gau wiped his forehead with his wrist, scoring another smear of dirt along it before he sighed and continued stubbornly planting the blooms with a sort of grim, dogged perseverence, reasserting bloom after bloom.

"I don't want Mister Raikou's pledge, or his honor to be at stake because of me again. I betrayed Mister Raikou's honor for a reason, and I would have accepted the punishment for it, because it needed to be done. Mister Raikou's word was to be kept at any cost, and I wanted to make his life better for him by fixing things with his sister even if that meant braking my promise."

He stared straight forward, not looking at Raikou. "Making pledges to me...if I were to betray you again, what would that leave you?"

He shook his head, slumping in the dirt, back mostly to Raikou. The scar down his chest ached. He resisted the urge to grip at it.

"I've never been here before. Do you like it here, Raikou-san? This place was your home, wasn't it?" He turned to look at him solemnly as ever--Gau who'd stopped going to school at thirteen.

Gau of all people knew what Raikou got like when he couldn't move where he wanted when he wanted. He...probably knew more of Raikou at this point than Raikou himself, did. And again, he wondered which memories were missing entirely, which parts of him had been sucked clean of anything...if Raikou even knew that anything was missing...

He couldn't imagine him being really all that happy with a job that forced him indoors all day, never mind the fact that Raikou enjoyed reading.

Gau swallowed. "When you...saved me...you'd left here. And you came back, which means Hogwarts must be a safe place, and a home for Mister Raikou." The frown lines growing between his brows deepened as he stared at the one, lurid turqoise flower there, "If I took Mister Raikou from that home, and I'm responsible for him returning to someplace good for him by not being there, then no matter how much I want to be by his side, I would leave, and all the complications would stop."

Gau reminded himself with disconnectedness that Raikou didn't remember. Even if he did, he was like a teacher.

"I'm here to make things right." Gau muttered. "And be useful to you. It's not a promise." He affirmed grimly, staring down at the misfitting blue flower in his hands. "It's just something I chose to do."

I love youuuu! 8(

[drivenbyblood]

Raikou tried his best to look unaffected. His words hadn't been a lie, but he could hardly expect Gau to know about the epiphany he had had while the boy had been unconscious in the hospital. Turning away, he closed his eyes and let Gau's words wash over him.

"I meant my promise then." he murmured, voice low, "But I changed my mind." he opened his eyes and gave Gau a softened smile, "When I saw you injured, my priorities shifted." he tilted his head back and looked up at the sky, "I realized how much you mean to me - as a friend and as a partner. Nothing you could have done would have merited me cutting you down." he grimaced, not bothering to hide his distaste, "That day..." he frowned and pulled Gau closer, "I wasn't aiming for you. You took the blow that was meant for Raimei."

There. That was the truth. Some of his unease left him as soon as he said the words. Now, he had to wait for Gau's reaction. He prayed that it would be favorable.

"Hogwarts was my home before everything got complicated in my life. I guess I came back here to...get some of that back. I wanted to...start over after I hurt you." he glanced at Gau, smiling faintly, "Then I choose to be useful to you too." he held out his hand, "I want us to be friends."

Was it insane to ask for such a thing? Raikou didn't know, but...

He had to try.

*laughs* *is loved FOR GREAT JUSTICE* Our pink-haired children will blot out the sun~

[cakebakenojutsu]

Now...Gau was still his straightforward self, wizard or not. And when he was confused boy did it show on his face.

"HUH?!"

He squirmed, wrestling his way up to stare at Raikou dumbfounded.

"Well why wouldn't we be friends?!"

The thought clearly, and plainly hadn't even occured to him. "I just needed to fix things so you didn't misunderstand. And WHY would you want to hit your sister with that? It didn't even kill me. Mister Raikou's heart wasn't into it, after all, I guess."

Gau scooped up the bunch of remaining flowers with a shrug, offering them. It sure took some doing to try to move with how Raikou still seemed to want to keep an arm on him.

If he remembers...does that mean those weren't really happy memories for him...? The thought half-drifted past Gau's mind.

Why would he...want a friendship with someone like him if the friendship didn't make him happy, though?

Aah. Raikou was so kind...
He'd still have to work at this, Gau affirmed stubbornly. He'd have to keep working to make things right.

"L...Look. You don't have to worry about me, Mister Raikou. I'm fine." Then he swallowed, a little idea drifting by seductively. "But...if you could...teach me magic...and help me with that..."

...Then for the first time in my life, I could really be useful to you. And I could really be at your side as something more than a burden and less of a weakness than a strength.

Who needs to see the sun? Pretty pink children are so much more alluring!

[drivenbyblood]

Now it was Raikou's turn to be dumbfounded. He had assumed after -

But Gau hadn't lost his ability to occasionally surprise him. It would take the Samurai a moment to recover.

"I did put you into a coma." he replied wryly, knowing he didn't need to point that out to Gau. Yet that was the truth. What kind of person would want to be friends with their attacker? Raikou had acted like an animal that night - thoughtless and angry.

"It wasn't." he murmured, briefly thinking about Raimei, "I wanted her to learn yet another lesson. I didn't want to kill her."

She was still his sister. Even if he had abandoned the Shimizu family, Raikou was not hardened nor cruel enough to kill an innocent - especially one that was reaching out to him. Raimei reminded him of mother so much.

Blinking out of his reverie, he touched the flowers gently. Opening his arms, he gathered them close, inhaling their scent.

"I hope so." Raikou tilted his head, his brows knitting together, "There are other Professors -" but he couldn't finish. A flash of possessiveness - and protectiveness - rose up inside of him. No. Gau would learn from him and him alone.

"It would be an honor." he smiled faintly.

Our children will be such happy little shota wizardbabies it'll be INCREDIBLY distracting~

[cakebakenojutsu]

"Well you didn't kill me, AND you saved my life before, so that doesn't even even it out." Gau replied. The embarrassing thing was he was perfectly serious, too. God, Raikou. Steeling himself to the possibility that you could kill, eat, rape, or maim him after saving him from the alley, and nobody would even have to know was one of the first things he did when he met you as an angrier, somewhat shorter, somewhat muddled thirteen-year-old. It's not particularly surprising that you wouldn't realize that, but it's still something he finds ridiculous.

Put it like that, and why wouldn't he still be friends with you? You could do something much worse to him, even, and he'd still stick by you.

Is your esteem for his loyalty really that low? When he admires you more than anyone else?

"You're being kind of dumb..." Gau muttered. Now there was something he'd never thought he'd say to Raikou. His face went red the instant he realized it. But...he was probably going to get punched in the face for it anyway, so he might as well finish it. "You think I'd want to be by your side, but not be friends? I wouldn't do that."

That was that. There is no possibility in his head of hating you in even the smallest way, Raikou.

He feels a little better, though. Even if the flowers weren't perfect, they still meant enough to Raikou, apparently.
Something had gone right.

...But...Gau somewhat doubted it would be an honor, if he was honest with himself. The more he thought about it, the more obvious it seemed that Raikou had grown up with knowledge of the Wizarding world. That...struck him as a bit of an advantage. It also meant he wouldn't be able to get all the right answers, though, and that worried him.

He gripped his wand in his grubby hand.

He didn't want to be a disappointment.

"I'm not...learning very fast. I'm trying as hard as I can, but things just aren't...they aren't working very well except for the cooking magic." Gau swallowed. "The man int he shop...he said it had something to do with me, and something to do with my wand, and...some other things."

And here they came to the thing which had been worrying him: "Mister...Raikou...? If I'm...from the outside world. Does that mean I can't do some things? Does that mean I can't be as good as you are?"

He had no idea the political history behind that, the theories, the movements. He didn't know any of that. All he knew was that Raikou was already different from him, and he didn't want to spend his time fighting for something that there was a rule in place for, and he's giving you that look of utter solemnness.

Whatever you say, it will be law, Raikou, you know that.

Hogwarts will be filled with the cutest wizards and witches /ever/!

[drivenbyblood]

"I almost killed you." Raikou reaffirmed, his expression becoming serious. Gau was right. He didn't know that Gau would likely forgive him of any transgression because of what he had done for him in the past. Then again, even if he had known, Raikou was likely to be very hard on himself. That was just his nature - even though he didn't show it very often.

"I...what?"

There it was again. Gau had surprised him. He might have hit the boy if he hadn't been thrown so off-guard. Raikou was just terribly rusty when it came to dealing with people. He was even rustier when it came to dealing with friends.

"...thank you."

That was all he could think to say. As long as Gau wanted to be his friend and stay by his side, he saw no reason to become angry. Besides, if truth be told, he probably was being a bit dumb. Or, at the very least, dense.

When the topic changed, however, Raikou found himself warming up to Gau all over again. His eyes narrowed as the boy finished to speaking.

"It doesn't matter where you came from or how much you know now. You can do anything you set your mind to."

He hated Pureblood elitists. The Shimizus had been bordering on elitism for years and the very thought of it made Raikou sick.

"Gau, no matter what anyone else says, you are just as good - if not better - than anyone in the Magical World."

To reinforce his point, he kissed Gau's brow and whispered:

"I wouldn't be offering to teach you if you were hopeless. You're not. Anyone who teases you will have to answer to me."