Bliggetty Blam!
Been quite pensive as of late, not to mention overtly obsessive compulsive, and freakishly pessimistic. And anyone who knows me will tell you that's not my style. I'm retardedly optimistic even when there's no hope whatsoever. And it sucks to be a perfectionist.
Is self-expression supposed to be this painful? I literally have to sit, reach far within myself, and forcefully purge imagery onto paper. It kind of frightens me a tad, because the way I see it, if I’m not creating art, then I cease to exist.
I'm attempting to make the most of my whole work situation- its kind of disconcerting that people so advanced in mathematics are quite nearly completely computer illiterate. I’ve been approached countless times with questions about what to do when they want to do this or that or requests for my aid when it comes to computer technicalities. I know the youth of America are more in tune to what to do when it comes to the electronics produced in this day and age, but really. Their job consists of designing the inner workings of the car, (All the parts that build it up, and whatnot) and ensuring the safety of their customers. Ugh. The freelance jobs are few and far between- but that's my fault, I haven't had the initiative to seek work in that area out, since I’m still treading water waiting for the inspiration to return. *The muse has taken a leave of absence*
Went for a long walk yesterday with my mum as company... She wanted to have one of those talks where I confided my deepest darkest secrets with her and she offers advice and consolation. I wanted to be contemplative. She expects too much from me. Jaysus. We got about three and a half, maybe four miles from home when we heard thunder clap in the distance, and mum nearly made me jump out of my skin when she hollered for me to run. Lightening cracked in the sky above us, and apparently she was afraid that we would be struck. So we literally RAN all the way back. Personally, I enjoy walking in the rain, but that wasn’t an option, being that I was in the company of my mother.
I need a nap…
Is self-expression supposed to be this painful? I literally have to sit, reach far within myself, and forcefully purge imagery onto paper. It kind of frightens me a tad, because the way I see it, if I’m not creating art, then I cease to exist.
I'm attempting to make the most of my whole work situation- its kind of disconcerting that people so advanced in mathematics are quite nearly completely computer illiterate. I’ve been approached countless times with questions about what to do when they want to do this or that or requests for my aid when it comes to computer technicalities. I know the youth of America are more in tune to what to do when it comes to the electronics produced in this day and age, but really. Their job consists of designing the inner workings of the car, (All the parts that build it up, and whatnot) and ensuring the safety of their customers. Ugh. The freelance jobs are few and far between- but that's my fault, I haven't had the initiative to seek work in that area out, since I’m still treading water waiting for the inspiration to return. *The muse has taken a leave of absence*
Went for a long walk yesterday with my mum as company... She wanted to have one of those talks where I confided my deepest darkest secrets with her and she offers advice and consolation. I wanted to be contemplative. She expects too much from me. Jaysus. We got about three and a half, maybe four miles from home when we heard thunder clap in the distance, and mum nearly made me jump out of my skin when she hollered for me to run. Lightening cracked in the sky above us, and apparently she was afraid that we would be struck. So we literally RAN all the way back. Personally, I enjoy walking in the rain, but that wasn’t an option, being that I was in the company of my mother.
I need a nap…