what a world....what a world
what a stupid ass day...i not only missed my class this morning...my bio one, but then i slept for three more hours watched garbage tv and then drove to hinsdale to drop off a present my mom got for my aunt and uncle to say thanks for letting me stay there for a week. not that going to my aunt and uncles sux, but its the fact that i spent more then 2 hours today just driving around listening to stupid ass chicago radio stations and more or less wishing that i didnt live with my parents anymore and had some money. today was just too wishy washy
tommorow is gonna be more of the same shit. i am going to wake up early make and appointment to talk to someone at columbia about my major and arrange a visit either tommorow (today) or friday. then i'm gonna go to class at 1 and then take the train downtown and waste even more of my time.
note to self...next time we have a shitty rainy day i need to go out and sit in the rain or near the rain and start to capture my thoughts about it. i need to start getting more intouch with my emotions, cause right now i feel like i am just grazing over the surface of life....someone said that "life is the thing that passes most people by while they are planning for it." i need to get off my ass and start doing shit.
my life is a dull boring place, where i am consistently drugging myself to put up with the boredum and create an illusion of a good time. what the fuck is with this world...why the hell am i here...and where the fuck am i going. if god exsists...i demand answers...and not answer's in those stupid ass pseudo-answer way...where i hafta read into it soo much that its niether white nor black its both and not at the same time. i want god to come down and write me a fucking email that says...Spyglass...this is what you gotta do and this is where its gonna take you...and when you get to here i am gonna take you...of course...god, assuming it exsists'...doesnt do shit like that cause then he'd either hafta do that for everyone or it would just ruin the ending for me.
tommorow is gonna be more of the same shit. i am going to wake up early make and appointment to talk to someone at columbia about my major and arrange a visit either tommorow (today) or friday. then i'm gonna go to class at 1 and then take the train downtown and waste even more of my time.
note to self...next time we have a shitty rainy day i need to go out and sit in the rain or near the rain and start to capture my thoughts about it. i need to start getting more intouch with my emotions, cause right now i feel like i am just grazing over the surface of life....someone said that "life is the thing that passes most people by while they are planning for it." i need to get off my ass and start doing shit.
my life is a dull boring place, where i am consistently drugging myself to put up with the boredum and create an illusion of a good time. what the fuck is with this world...why the hell am i here...and where the fuck am i going. if god exsists...i demand answers...and not answer's in those stupid ass pseudo-answer way...where i hafta read into it soo much that its niether white nor black its both and not at the same time. i want god to come down and write me a fucking email that says...Spyglass...this is what you gotta do and this is where its gonna take you...and when you get to here i am gonna take you...of course...god, assuming it exsists'...doesnt do shit like that cause then he'd either hafta do that for everyone or it would just ruin the ending for me.