Computer update, Nightminds and a big life decision.....
Ok, no time for a really long post. I just wanted to let everyone know that my computer is back up and running *YAY*. BUT I lost what I had typed for chapter 16 of NIGHTMINDS - *BOOOOOO!* So I have to retype it. I'm going to focus on that tomorrow after work.
Also, today at work - bad 90 review. Basically they said I'm not getting the "voice" of the PR department in my writing, I have to many errors.... and I'm on a 90 probation to see if I can fix them. I'm going to try, I mean I've *been* trying. But I've never really been a details person - especially when it comes to grammar and things of that nature. So we'll see - either in 90 days I'll still have a job or I'll have a really good reason NOT to come home from Japan.
But, I was thinking today - I never really take things seriously. I know, I know, you think "oh of couse you do Kat." But, really, I don't at the paper I would whip out an assignment, give it to my boss and be done with it. Maybe if I sit down, stop and focus on what I'm doing at the hosptial I can really improve and keep my job. Also, I've been doing lots of thinking about my writing. The truth is, dispite all of the crazy things that have happened over the course of writing Nightminds - I've really enjoyed it. Getting feedback from people and feeling the sense of accomplishment I get from finishing a chapter is unlike anything I've felt for a long time. So I've come to a decsion; after Nightminds all of my fanfiction is going to go on the back burner. I really want to focus on writing original pieces I can publish. REALLY focus on it. Like read books about writing and really kick my ass every day to write something, carry a notebook around - hell start to drink frothy caffinated drinks with a freakin beret on if it helps. This is what I'm meant to do and it's what I'm the best at.
Now this is where it all turns full circle to the bad review I had today. If I'm honest with myself, really honest, I've never worked hard at anything. Those people you see with thier nose to the grindstone, fighting thought the pain just to get to the next level- I've never really been all about that. But I think that's where everything has to change. If I don't shape up and get like that I'm going to lose my job - a job I love very much. Also, the only way I'm ever going to succeede at my career as a writer is to become like that.
So what seemed like awful news this afternoon actually was just a kick in the ass from the Universe. I've said "I'm going to work hard" before but never really put anything into it. Maybe because I'm afraid to grow up and leave some of the things I love (like anime) on the back burner. Because, honestly, if I want to get anything done - it is going to have to be put in it's own special place. I'll still watch it on a certain time on a certain day but I can't just surf the web and dawdle away my hours doing nothing productive. I want to make something of myself and that is a sure fire way to stay in loserville, camped infront of the computer for another 25 years wishing I had what it took to "go somewhere."
Do not worry, my Nightminds readers I will give you and ending. OH SUCH AN ENDING I WILL GIVE. This is my promise to you.
See, I said it would be short and it totally was not. Am I a writer or what? ^..^
Also, today at work - bad 90 review. Basically they said I'm not getting the "voice" of the PR department in my writing, I have to many errors.... and I'm on a 90 probation to see if I can fix them. I'm going to try, I mean I've *been* trying. But I've never really been a details person - especially when it comes to grammar and things of that nature. So we'll see - either in 90 days I'll still have a job or I'll have a really good reason NOT to come home from Japan.
But, I was thinking today - I never really take things seriously. I know, I know, you think "oh of couse you do Kat." But, really, I don't at the paper I would whip out an assignment, give it to my boss and be done with it. Maybe if I sit down, stop and focus on what I'm doing at the hosptial I can really improve and keep my job. Also, I've been doing lots of thinking about my writing. The truth is, dispite all of the crazy things that have happened over the course of writing Nightminds - I've really enjoyed it. Getting feedback from people and feeling the sense of accomplishment I get from finishing a chapter is unlike anything I've felt for a long time. So I've come to a decsion; after Nightminds all of my fanfiction is going to go on the back burner. I really want to focus on writing original pieces I can publish. REALLY focus on it. Like read books about writing and really kick my ass every day to write something, carry a notebook around - hell start to drink frothy caffinated drinks with a freakin beret on if it helps. This is what I'm meant to do and it's what I'm the best at.
Now this is where it all turns full circle to the bad review I had today. If I'm honest with myself, really honest, I've never worked hard at anything. Those people you see with thier nose to the grindstone, fighting thought the pain just to get to the next level- I've never really been all about that. But I think that's where everything has to change. If I don't shape up and get like that I'm going to lose my job - a job I love very much. Also, the only way I'm ever going to succeede at my career as a writer is to become like that.
So what seemed like awful news this afternoon actually was just a kick in the ass from the Universe. I've said "I'm going to work hard" before but never really put anything into it. Maybe because I'm afraid to grow up and leave some of the things I love (like anime) on the back burner. Because, honestly, if I want to get anything done - it is going to have to be put in it's own special place. I'll still watch it on a certain time on a certain day but I can't just surf the web and dawdle away my hours doing nothing productive. I want to make something of myself and that is a sure fire way to stay in loserville, camped infront of the computer for another 25 years wishing I had what it took to "go somewhere."
Do not worry, my Nightminds readers I will give you and ending. OH SUCH AN ENDING I WILL GIVE. This is my promise to you.
See, I said it would be short and it totally was not. Am I a writer or what? ^..^