What would you say if I just went away?!?!
Today has been the day from hell. I am just losing the lil' grip that I had on life, and this time I am not even going to try to get it back. Yesterday at work, I got paid to drink on the clock..that was pretty sweet. Today, I had a hypotniq (sp) martini...now that was some good shit. Everything is seriouosly going wrong....and Im falling to pieces!
I had detention today after class (rolls eyes), my financial aid is all fucked up.. my life is really going to shit, and to be quite frank, I don't give a damn..... I have tried everything to fight depression, but needless to say it's not helping at all. I just really don't know what to do. I feel really bad, because of what I am putting Jase thru, sometimes I think I should let him go so Im not hurting him. All though I never wanna be without him, I don't wanna hurt him either. I just feel like Im hurting him, it maybe because I am turning to complete shit, maybe its just me thinking, or maybe its because I hurt everyone in my life.
I guess maybe I am just useta bring nothing but pain and chaos to everyone that is embraced with my prescence. Sometimes, I feel like I am meant to live a life full of loneliness. I dunno....I know that I won't be able to live without Jase!!!! Ok, Im really getting depressed so I am going to disappear now....I love u Jase, and I hope you can continue to put up with me....and not bail out!
I had detention today after class (rolls eyes), my financial aid is all fucked up.. my life is really going to shit, and to be quite frank, I don't give a damn..... I have tried everything to fight depression, but needless to say it's not helping at all. I just really don't know what to do. I feel really bad, because of what I am putting Jase thru, sometimes I think I should let him go so Im not hurting him. All though I never wanna be without him, I don't wanna hurt him either. I just feel like Im hurting him, it maybe because I am turning to complete shit, maybe its just me thinking, or maybe its because I hurt everyone in my life.
I guess maybe I am just useta bring nothing but pain and chaos to everyone that is embraced with my prescence. Sometimes, I feel like I am meant to live a life full of loneliness. I dunno....I know that I won't be able to live without Jase!!!! Ok, Im really getting depressed so I am going to disappear now....I love u Jase, and I hope you can continue to put up with me....and not bail out!