Re: I was hoping to hear your thoughts about this, V!enthusiasmflailMay 2 2011, 04:12:57 UTC
Hee, hello!
Ah, glad to have solidarity in Debbie Downer-ness! I find weddings to be...curious...events. Most of my friends are unmarried or single, but it has been surreal to witness the weddings (and the preparations) of my friends who are. The stress of planning these things is unbelievable. And the scrutiny! The scrutiny is overwhelming! So often, despite the couple's best intentions, the plans for a simple, low-key wedding warp into this giant clusterfuck of consumerism, politics, hurt feelings, entitlement, raging gossip and insecurities. While I'm happy to chip in for wedding and bridal shower gifts, I find it really strange that we lavish a married couple with gifts (who have the most social and economic currency in our society, particularly if you happen to be white, hetero, and middle-class), but we do nothing of the sort for those who are (generally) in more need of material gifts, like single mothers, 'singletons' or elderly pensioners. A good friend of mine revealed that the money given at their reception paid off all her student loans and then some. While I was genuinely happy for her, it grated a bit that she received all this money just by virtue of getting married. It helps solidify this perceived sense of superiority that's granted just for getting married.
As far as royalty goes, I love learning about their history (so many macabre bits!), but the concept of a monarchy is morally abhorrent. While their current relationship with Britain and the Commonwealth is pleasantly benign, we tend to easily forget that they are essentially a very wealthy, high-maintenance welfare family. I agree- that palace would be a friggin' incredible museum.
The fawning was insufferable, wasn't it? The American media were particularly bad for this. For them, the wedding was akin to a lavish celebrity wedding. My mom is a dental hygienist, and she dared to say that Kate Middleton was a good-looking girl, and seemed to have a nice 'girl next door' quality about her. Her dental patient stared at her in horror, and said that she had *never* seen a girl more beautiful than Kate, and that she did *not* appreciate my mom's 'snippy' comments. My mom didn't say anything remotely unkind in word or tone, but was sassed just for not fawning over her! If someone genuinely thinks that William and Kate are the best ever and win all the things, that's just fine and it's their opinion, but I find the expectation to fawn foolish and degrading.
Ah, glad to have solidarity in Debbie Downer-ness! I find weddings to be...curious...events. Most of my friends are unmarried or single, but it has been surreal to witness the weddings (and the preparations) of my friends who are. The stress of planning these things is unbelievable. And the scrutiny! The scrutiny is overwhelming! So often, despite the couple's best intentions, the plans for a simple, low-key wedding warp into this giant clusterfuck of consumerism, politics, hurt feelings, entitlement, raging gossip and insecurities. While I'm happy to chip in for wedding and bridal shower gifts, I find it really strange that we lavish a married couple with gifts (who have the most social and economic currency in our society, particularly if you happen to be white, hetero, and middle-class), but we do nothing of the sort for those who are (generally) in more need of material gifts, like single mothers, 'singletons' or elderly pensioners. A good friend of mine revealed that the money given at their reception paid off all her student loans and then some. While I was genuinely happy for her, it grated a bit that she received all this money just by virtue of getting married. It helps solidify this perceived sense of superiority that's granted just for getting married.
As far as royalty goes, I love learning about their history (so many macabre bits!), but the concept of a monarchy is morally abhorrent. While their current relationship with Britain and the Commonwealth is pleasantly benign, we tend to easily forget that they are essentially a very wealthy, high-maintenance welfare family. I agree- that palace would be a friggin' incredible museum.
The fawning was insufferable, wasn't it? The American media were particularly bad for this. For them, the wedding was akin to a lavish celebrity wedding. My mom is a dental hygienist, and she dared to say that Kate Middleton was a good-looking girl, and seemed to have a nice 'girl next door' quality about her. Her dental patient stared at her in horror, and said that she had *never* seen a girl more beautiful than Kate, and that she did *not* appreciate my mom's 'snippy' comments. My mom didn't say anything remotely unkind in word or tone, but was sassed just for not fawning over her! If someone genuinely thinks that William and Kate are the best ever and win all the things, that's just fine and it's their opinion, but I find the expectation to fawn foolish and degrading.
Oof- all of this rambling to say: I agree.
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