there's a reason I'm more the "english major type"
man. I'm basically going to repeat what I wrote yesterday. BUT I woke up this morning ready to really try and tackle the business side of things. I decided, I'm here, I have all of these chances to learn about the business side of things and I should - I was on a mission.
But then I put things into action. I read a 10 page document of our Executive Summary - which is something we send out to potential investors so that they can know all of the ins and outs of my company's business. It was essentially a handbook for all the things that we do. Should have been easy and I should have already known all of it. But for the life of me, I couldn't get through it. I seriously hate business and economics and legal things. Then we got in a Senior Debt Proposal from a Bank for financing. and I tried to read that. I tackled it like a dense textbook - if I didn't understand a word or a point, I wikipedia-ed it. I took fucking notes. And dear god. I don't know how people get turned on and pumped up about this stuff. This isn't even stuff that I could see myself reaching a point of liking somewhere down the line. Or even putting up with.
It's the most frustrating thing in the world, because I do this exact same thing at least every 2 weeks. and I always fail. And I know that I'm smart, so why is this so unbelievably hard? It's like I enter this world and just tune out. All through school I got straight As and then Bs in math. And I was in the advanced math classes, and maybe half of the time I'd be able to pull off an A on a test - but I always just lost it a few weeks into the semester. I hated it. I get massive anxiety being around it even.
I'm in the wrong place. I need to help myself out and make a move towards something more productive in my life and career - it's like I'm in the wrong major in college. The only thing that I get enjoyment out of in my day is goofing around joking on im, email or facebook. My latest vice is writing fake press releases. Which in no way pays the bills. After this brief stint in business, econ, pre-law, I totally know why I excelled so much in liberal arts. I need to deal in words, not numbers. I think I'll go home and cry myself to sleep on my HUGE pillow.
But then I put things into action. I read a 10 page document of our Executive Summary - which is something we send out to potential investors so that they can know all of the ins and outs of my company's business. It was essentially a handbook for all the things that we do. Should have been easy and I should have already known all of it. But for the life of me, I couldn't get through it. I seriously hate business and economics and legal things. Then we got in a Senior Debt Proposal from a Bank for financing. and I tried to read that. I tackled it like a dense textbook - if I didn't understand a word or a point, I wikipedia-ed it. I took fucking notes. And dear god. I don't know how people get turned on and pumped up about this stuff. This isn't even stuff that I could see myself reaching a point of liking somewhere down the line. Or even putting up with.
It's the most frustrating thing in the world, because I do this exact same thing at least every 2 weeks. and I always fail. And I know that I'm smart, so why is this so unbelievably hard? It's like I enter this world and just tune out. All through school I got straight As and then Bs in math. And I was in the advanced math classes, and maybe half of the time I'd be able to pull off an A on a test - but I always just lost it a few weeks into the semester. I hated it. I get massive anxiety being around it even.
I'm in the wrong place. I need to help myself out and make a move towards something more productive in my life and career - it's like I'm in the wrong major in college. The only thing that I get enjoyment out of in my day is goofing around joking on im, email or facebook. My latest vice is writing fake press releases. Which in no way pays the bills. After this brief stint in business, econ, pre-law, I totally know why I excelled so much in liberal arts. I need to deal in words, not numbers. I think I'll go home and cry myself to sleep on my HUGE pillow.