not the only one
in a way i'm glad i'm not the only one who notices when ray acts differently. he chose not to take his meds today and he's been really irritating. even josh and ashley noticed it. all he's done is try to piss me off all night. he said he wanted to go to josh and ashley's house to relax and have fun, but ever since we got here all he's done is fuck with me. even ashley has had to say something to him. he don't think that he's doin anything, but he does. he'll apologize just so i get closer to him so he can keep doing the same thing. i'm so tired of it. i want to spend more time with him before i leave but he's making it hard when all he does is act like an asshole towards me. i wish he actually cared about me. i might be sleeping in the car since he's saying he's locking the doors if i don't go home in 5 mins. i never told him to go home and as usual he's blackmailing me to do what he wants. all he's gonna do when i get home is fuck with me some more and fight with me some more why i don't want to have sex with him. can't really get in the mood if all he's doing is messing with me. im sooo tired. there's been soo many things ive had to do for my deployment, and now fernando's gonna be here soon to make it even worse. ray's threatening me with divorce again. i don't know what else to do with him. i can't stand his shit! it's been soo good for the past few days. he had to go and fuck it up by not taking his meds...WTF?!
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