aamah
in
spuffy_fics
Goodbye, Mr. Giles
Title: Goodbye, Mr. Giles
Author: Aamah
Pairing: S/B
Rating by chapter: Chapter 29 ~ PG
Genre: Post NFA ~ General
Warning by chapter: Chapter 29 ~ language
Many thanks to beta: myfeetshowit whose patience is infinite
Based on characters created by Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. No copyright infringement intended. Original characters are mine.
Chapter 29 ~ Tribulation
The team went on, as they always had, full speed ahead. Giles provided Spike with a laptop and an access code to the Council files. That way the work was divided between Giles, Spike, and Xander. Giles still had a school to run… a school in crisis. That left Xander…and now Spike to do research. They knew who the bad guy was, they just had to find him….and find out about him. The more they knew, the safer Buffy would be. Xander called Willow and assigned her an Internet assignment studying maps to learn all she could about the area to find places that might serve as a vampire lair. She was to consider all possibilities from vacant houses to caves and crypts. Each of the schools had extensive libraries, but none so complete as the one in Gloucester so the traditional tedious research would fall to those on the scene.
Buffy was training hard during the day between sessions with the students and she patrolled at night. There was always the off chance that Buffy would encounter Binnemon and the whole ordeal would end right then and there. She had an opportunity to study Binnemon’s employee record with his picture so she knew what to look for. “Fat bald man with fangs. Check!”
Every night before they went out they listened to Spike whine that he should be the one watching Buffy’s back. Every night they reminded him that until his balls were sealed, he wasn’t going anywhere. That shut him up.
Either Xander or Giles served as backup. Independently, they each concluded that it was different on patrol this time and they couldn’t decide why. This enemy was one vampire with some fledglings. There was less of a threat? No, there was something else. Lord knew they’d faced more threatening foes in the past.
It was different this time. Buffy was different. Buffy on patrol stood tall, head held high, literally daring vampires and all beasties encountered to show themselves. Now Buffy was cautious. She listened to the night sounds for clues and startled when she heard them. No more quips and puns. No longer did Buffy thrash through underbrush crushing it as she went, now she moved stealthily so that she might come upon an enemy before they came upon her.
One night when Xander was with Buffy, they came upon what must have at one time been a gardening shed. When the Council acquired the property, they built a Quonset hut to house the larger garden implements and tractors used so they expected the little shed to be vacant. Instead, they found a well-worn path with recent footprints leading to the road. Muddy tracks were visible on the dry pavement, and the scent of snuffed candles lingered in the air. Xander headed for the shed. Buffy became agitated and cautioned him to get away. The danger was too great, she said, adding, “We’ll come back tomorrow, in daylight when we have the advantage.”
Xander couldn’t argue the wisdom of the plan, but in all the times they patrolled together, this was the first time she was Cautious Buffy instead of a Full Speed Ahead Buffy. It was unsettling.
Xander puzzled over how to handle the situation and finally decided he had to talk to Giles about it. On arriving at work the next morning, Xander met Adele waiting for the elevator. They rode in silence. As they exited, Xander asked her to put him on Giles calendar for sometime that day.
~~~
Leah Graham was grateful that her treatment plan was working. The more time she spent with Buffy and Spike, the more she liked them. She smiled as she thought about the way they fought like cats and dogs, but even witnessing the battles, it was evident that they were so very much in love. It was a trying time for them and put a terrible strain on the relationship. She was happy that she could tell them that she expected to remove the last of the packing today.
Spike was losing weight, and it baffled her. She had asked Buffy to keep a diary of what he consumed each day for her to study. She was sure his survival needs were being met. Buffy admitted her concern, but the doctor offered no words of comfort. Leah wanted to do more testing, but with the American holiday upon them, she didn’t see any harm in waiting until after Buffy’s sister returned to America. After all they’d been through, this was a special family time. She didn’t want to cast a pall on the visit.
~~~
Buffy’s assignment was to spend more time in training. She knew that was what she needed better than anyone. In the classes with the slayers, she’d been bested more than once. She covered it well, at least she thought she did, with jokes and comments to let the girls think it was intended. She wasn’t nearly as fast and she wasn’t as strong as she once was. There hadn’t been any open wounds but bruises took longer to go away and a good hot bath wasn’t so much a luxury as a necessity. Spike teased her about her lengthy baths. She didn’t think he noticed that she was taking Motrin twice a day or that he wasn’t the only one losing weight.
Buffy hadn’t mentioned it to anyone and considered talking to Dr. Graham about it. She said she had a familiarity with vampire and slayer physiology. Maybe she could shed some light on what was going on. It wasn’t a concern until now. Of late, Buffy's life had become cushy. Her strength and speed were no longer needed except for demonstration purposes. Now her life depended on it. More than ever, she wanted to live. Maybe while everyone was in research mode she’d throw in a hypothetical question about slayer prophecies regarding diminishing powers. It would be tricky. Spike had a way of hearing things she never said.
~~~
The New Council Academy for Exceptional Girls was holding it’s own after a week of horror, loss, sorrow, and disruption. Everyone, down to the last employee knew the ordeal wasn’t nearly over, but at least things had quieted down a bit.
For all persons connected with the school, and most especially for the girls, the Council arranged a private memorial service. The girls needed to grieve. It was the best they could do until the body was released. The Council had assumed guardianship of Chastity when she came to the school and now held the responsibility for final arrangements. Giles asked Xander to investigate the “ownership” of the graveyard adjacent to the school. He hoped that the Council could take over its stewardship and provide a burial place for Chastity…. and others connected with the school, and the Council, for that matter….if they so wished, himself included. It wasn’t anything he’d ever given thought to before, but now, the notion seemed correct.
The Memorial Service was tasteful, open only to the staff and students. An invitation was extended to the parents of the other girls. Giles was grateful when none chose to attend but many sent condolences in the form of financial gifts for a memorial or a scholarship in Chastity’s name. Others sent telegrams expressing their support for the school. He was surprised that not one parent or guardian called in anger, demanding answers as to how such a tragedy could occur. It saddened him and reinforced the notion that they were relieved to be free of their vexatious daughters. Lydia Chalmers served as mistress of ceremonies.
After a non-denominational prayer service, anyone who wished said a few words. Funeral rituals commonly bring tears, Giles thought, for no other reason than they remind us of our own mortality. As the girls expressed their sorrow, he observed that their comments were devoid of emotion. Not cold, exactly, but stiff and forced. Chastity hadn’t been at the school long enough to make friends. The girls cried, but Giles felt their tears were more out of fear than sorrow. Unfortunately, the media sullied the whole event as they tried to get compelling photographs of grief. It sickened him.
~~~
Giles hung up the phone after a conversation with Willow when Adele’s voice came over the intercom saying that Mr. Harris was here to see him. A smile came to his face. “Send him in, please Adele.”
“Your timing couldn’t be better, Xander. I just got off the phone with Willow. She sends her regards.”
“Geez, Giles, you’re in a chipper mood. We have asteroids tumbling into our lives and you’re positively glowing. I don’t get it,” said Xander sitting down and taking on a serious tone. “Actually, I’ve got something important to talk to you about.”
“As do I, Xander, but the word from Willow was good and any good news these days is most welcome. Allow me to bask in the moment if you don’t mind.” Giles pressed the intercom and asked Adele to step in for a moment.
“Bask away, G-man, as long as I can bask along with you. There’s good news? That’s different.”
Giles took off his glasses and reached in his vest pocket for his handkerchief. “Yes….” Giles really didn’t want to share that he asked Willow to use her influence with the Covens to cast a spell on the staff and students. The good news had to do with their success and the reassurance that no lasting effects were expected. Now he had to think fast. Come up with something that Xander would believe. Thankfully, he had a reprieve when Adele came in.
“Mr. Giles?” was all she said. Adele was a changed woman. Where she had been chatty and cheerful before, now she was sullen and withdrawn. The events of the past few weeks had taken a toll. DI Arthur’s investigation had cast suspicion on Mr. Giles as well as other staff members and planted a seed of doubt in her mind. It hurt him deeply that she would even consider the possibility that he might have committed such a horrendous crime. Still, he understood that once an element of fear emerged, someone with only a casual acquaintance might allow that seed to grow. He wanted to shout at her to stop being ridiculous, but recalled that her husband wanted to poke him in the nose over nothing more than a little disagreement. If he thought that Adele was convinced that Giles was the killer, he’d come after him guns-a-blazing.
“Ah, Mrs. Reed. As you know, I wasn’t expecting Mr. Harris but as it happens there are some things I need to go over with him. Would you be kind enough to bring his file as well as Ms. Summers file… and one more thing….maybe some tea?” With her attitude of late he feared she was going to tell him to get his own damned tea. She agreed without a fuss, so maybe things weren’t as bad as he feared.
“My file, Giles? Should I be concerned? I came to see you, remember? You’re supposed to be wondering what I wanted, not making me wonder what you want…that’s the way it works.”
“Yes, yes, I know that,” Giles said, becoming impatient. “Let’s just wait until Adele brings the files and tea, alright?” After an awkward silence, Giles went on, “Tell me now, have you seen the inspector again? Do you know how the investigation is going? What about this damn spreadsheet he’s so proud of? Is it telling him anything we don’t already know?”
“Wow!” Xander said, sitting up straighter in his chair. “That was a boatload of questions…important questions. Did you ever think he might have your office bugged?” he said, glancing around the office with suspicion. “I think you’re the prime suspect. Maybe you should be choosing your words more carefully.”
“Bugged?” cried Giles. Adele brought in the files and the tea on a tray with biscuits.
“Bugs?” She said nearly dropping the tray. “Where? Should I call the exterminator?”
Xander jumped in for the rescue, “No, not bugs, Mrs. Reed. I told Mr. Giles he bugged me and he was offended. Do you know what that means, Mrs. Reed?”
“Indeed I do, Mr. Harris. It means you feel that Mr. Giles is getting under your skin. Making you itchy…bugging you.” She raised her chin indignantly and said, “I’m sure if that’s true, Mr. Harris, you needed a thorough bugging.” With that, she turned on her heel and left the room.
“Great G. I cover your ass and get mine whipped!”
Giles smiled. “I’m rarely that lucky.” Turning somber, he said, “Now, are you honestly concerned that this office may be bugged?”
“Stranger things have happened, my man… and if they got a warrant for surveillance, they can use anything you said against you.”
With a mouth full of cookie, Giles mumbled, “So, what do I do….um….sweep for bugs…that is the right term, isn’t it?”
“Sheesh, I don’t know.” Xander was stuck for a moment, it sounded like Giles really wanted his advice…this was unexpected. He thought a bit and then said, “What about calling Willow? I may have gotten you upset over nothing. She’s got all kinds of protection spells going right? Maybe there’s nothing to be concerned about…you know?…all lines blocked and all?”
“Right you are. I’ll call her now.” He picked up the phone and then paused, “But you wanted to talk to me about something important, something strange. Stranger than usual, I presume,” Giles said, reaching for another cookie.
For a second Xander was startled. He had come here with one purpose and had been distracted by at least three different things in the meantime. “Oh! Right…. um…. yeah….it’s kind of awkward.” He cleared his throat. “Um…I don’t know where to start.”
Giles put the phone down carefully and stared at Xander, expressionless. “Now I am concerned. Go on.”
“OK. Straight out with it. I’m worried about Buffy.”
Giles did not react at all, just said an elongated, “Yes.”
“Yes.” Xander replied as he squirmed in his seat. “I think there’s something wrong with her. When we patrol she is extra careful. She hasn’t fought with anything since…well, since I don’t know when. If we see tracks or signs that there is something around she just “takes note” and says she’ll come back in the daylight to check it out. She lets me take the lead… me!”
Giles took a deep breath before speaking. “Isn’t it possible there isn’t anything out there? We’ve been here almost two years and weren’t aware of any demonic activity…although, now I realize we were living in a fool’s paradise and chose not to see the signs.”
“No. A couple of times when her super strength was called for and she didn’t have the stuff. She made a joke and blew it off saying since Spike is here she feels all girly and lets him be the man! But that doesn’t wash because he’s laid up…so much for manliness.”
“Alright, this is to go no further than this room, do you understand?” Giles said, standing. He walked around his desk.
“What makes this different than anything else? Of course I understand. Geez , Giles, you act like this is my first time round the block.”
Giles stared him down. “I’ve noticed the same behavior myself. I even asked if she was ill. She denied it vehemently. The only thing I could get her to admit to was that she and Spike were having some difficulties. She refused to elaborate….” He paused, “for …which …I was eternally grateful. I do not wish to know the particulars of their relationship. I have a vivid imagination and prefer not to dwell on what they do in their alone time.”
“With you on that one, chief.”
Continuing, Giles said, “Still, I can understand that something wrong between them would take a toll on Buffy’s psyche. I remember a time in the past when she was so lost that I feared she no longer had a will to go on and as such was a danger to herself. Do you think something like that may be happening now?”
“Honestly? No. It’s as if she’s afraid of getting hurt. Maybe what happened to Spike has done a number on her.”
Giles returned to his seat. “Xander, I want to thank you for coming to me with this. I’m not sure how to handle it. Maybe I’ll talk to Leah Graham about it. I think the Holiday gathering and Dawn being here may help. At the very least, Dawn may get her to talk and find out what’s troubling her.”
“Hey man, you know I’ve always loved her a little more than I should. I worry about her.” Xander rose to leave. “I’ll catch you later.” Startled by the remark, Giles glanced up just in time to see the door close.
~~~
Thanksgiving was nearly upon them. Dawn would be arriving Wednesday evening. Giles had already arranged for Pinthistle to pick her up at the airport. In the meantime a small war was brewing regarding Dawn staying in the dorm.
Spike said: She shouldn’t stay in the dorm because it may not be safe.
Buffy said: What could be safer than being with thirty slayers? She shouldn’t stay in the cottage because you’re convalescing. She should stay in the dorm because there’s really no room for her in the cottage.
Spike said: She’s your sister, where else should she stay but with family
Buffy said: There’s no room in the cottage.
Spike said: She doesn’t take up much room. What about her privacy?
Buffy said: What about our privacy?
And on and on it went.
To the outward observer, life in True Love Cottage (named by MacGregor and turned into Twisted Love Cottage by Xander) was nothing short of Paradise. Buffy had become the perfect caretaker. She saw to Spike’s every need, and Spike was gracious in return. As the swelling went down and the discoloration ebbed, Spike was up and about as much as Buffy allowed.
Anyone who knew Spike at all knew that he was usually in a state of perpetual motion. The limitations of movement and blood restriction further agitated him. Dr. Graham left Spike in charge of his blood intake, as he was nothing else if not responsible where Buffy’s safety was concerned. Unable to prove his strength with smash and bash, he sought to demonstrate his strength through will power and allowed himself only six ounces of pig blood every other day. He quoted the doctor who insisted that slowing his metabolism would increase the probability of beating this thing. With too much time on his hands, the one thought that consumed his thoughts was that he might not beat this thing. Life was playing the cruelest trick of all.
He was a man of more than average intelligence. That was a truth even before he was turned. Now, with nearly 150 years of living and exposure to all that had happened to the world in that time, he was a veritable encyclopedia of knowledge and he knew how to use it. It all went for naught when his heart did his thinking. Spike knew he was hurting Buffy and he was helpless to stop. He loved her with all that he was, but he feared that he was no longer whole. Their relationship was so much more than sex but he couldn’t ignore that part of it. They were perfect sexual partners, all at once wild and tender, passionate and sweet. He worried that he could no longer….do his part….and was terrified to find out. Rather than deal with it, he avoided being alone with her…in fact, he avoided being alone with her at all.
Buffy never said a word about it. She didn’t need to. He saw the hurt in her eyes every time she tried to be near him. He would pretend to be asleep when she came in the room or keep MacGregor talking until she was too tired and went to bed. He made sure he showered when she wasn’t there. Showering together had always been a special time for them. Now, Dawn was coming and could stay at the cottage….maybe that would give him the time he needed to work things out.
Buffy knew well enough that they were in trouble, but she really didn’t have any clue what was happening. All she knew was that once again, she was alone. It was killing her, she was sure of it. She felt herself weakening every day and it was because she could not face another loss. There were too many losses in her life and now she was losing Spike. What was the point of going on if it meant going on without him? She knew the signs. She remembered when her parents divorced. Whatever room her Mom and Dad were in together was always cold, tense. Now, she felt it whenever she walked into the cottage and every night as she slept alone. As she frantically tried to reason why this was happening, she decided that he must have known he would tire of her and that was why he didn’t try to find her when he came back. Her one hope was that they could find healing in an embrace. Dr. Graham said that Spike’s wound was healed. Thanksgiving was coming. Dawn would be visiting but she was going to stay at the dorm. MacGregor wouldn’t come over the holiday. Maybe that would give them time alone to be in one another’s arms.
~~~
X-posted - captured_kiss, spikes_fic, spuffy_fic
Author: Aamah
Pairing: S/B
Rating by chapter: Chapter 29 ~ PG
Genre: Post NFA ~ General
Warning by chapter: Chapter 29 ~ language
Many thanks to beta: myfeetshowit whose patience is infinite
Based on characters created by Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. No copyright infringement intended. Original characters are mine.
Chapter 29 ~ Tribulation
The team went on, as they always had, full speed ahead. Giles provided Spike with a laptop and an access code to the Council files. That way the work was divided between Giles, Spike, and Xander. Giles still had a school to run… a school in crisis. That left Xander…and now Spike to do research. They knew who the bad guy was, they just had to find him….and find out about him. The more they knew, the safer Buffy would be. Xander called Willow and assigned her an Internet assignment studying maps to learn all she could about the area to find places that might serve as a vampire lair. She was to consider all possibilities from vacant houses to caves and crypts. Each of the schools had extensive libraries, but none so complete as the one in Gloucester so the traditional tedious research would fall to those on the scene.
Buffy was training hard during the day between sessions with the students and she patrolled at night. There was always the off chance that Buffy would encounter Binnemon and the whole ordeal would end right then and there. She had an opportunity to study Binnemon’s employee record with his picture so she knew what to look for. “Fat bald man with fangs. Check!”
Every night before they went out they listened to Spike whine that he should be the one watching Buffy’s back. Every night they reminded him that until his balls were sealed, he wasn’t going anywhere. That shut him up.
Either Xander or Giles served as backup. Independently, they each concluded that it was different on patrol this time and they couldn’t decide why. This enemy was one vampire with some fledglings. There was less of a threat? No, there was something else. Lord knew they’d faced more threatening foes in the past.
It was different this time. Buffy was different. Buffy on patrol stood tall, head held high, literally daring vampires and all beasties encountered to show themselves. Now Buffy was cautious. She listened to the night sounds for clues and startled when she heard them. No more quips and puns. No longer did Buffy thrash through underbrush crushing it as she went, now she moved stealthily so that she might come upon an enemy before they came upon her.
One night when Xander was with Buffy, they came upon what must have at one time been a gardening shed. When the Council acquired the property, they built a Quonset hut to house the larger garden implements and tractors used so they expected the little shed to be vacant. Instead, they found a well-worn path with recent footprints leading to the road. Muddy tracks were visible on the dry pavement, and the scent of snuffed candles lingered in the air. Xander headed for the shed. Buffy became agitated and cautioned him to get away. The danger was too great, she said, adding, “We’ll come back tomorrow, in daylight when we have the advantage.”
Xander couldn’t argue the wisdom of the plan, but in all the times they patrolled together, this was the first time she was Cautious Buffy instead of a Full Speed Ahead Buffy. It was unsettling.
Xander puzzled over how to handle the situation and finally decided he had to talk to Giles about it. On arriving at work the next morning, Xander met Adele waiting for the elevator. They rode in silence. As they exited, Xander asked her to put him on Giles calendar for sometime that day.
~~~
Leah Graham was grateful that her treatment plan was working. The more time she spent with Buffy and Spike, the more she liked them. She smiled as she thought about the way they fought like cats and dogs, but even witnessing the battles, it was evident that they were so very much in love. It was a trying time for them and put a terrible strain on the relationship. She was happy that she could tell them that she expected to remove the last of the packing today.
Spike was losing weight, and it baffled her. She had asked Buffy to keep a diary of what he consumed each day for her to study. She was sure his survival needs were being met. Buffy admitted her concern, but the doctor offered no words of comfort. Leah wanted to do more testing, but with the American holiday upon them, she didn’t see any harm in waiting until after Buffy’s sister returned to America. After all they’d been through, this was a special family time. She didn’t want to cast a pall on the visit.
~~~
Buffy’s assignment was to spend more time in training. She knew that was what she needed better than anyone. In the classes with the slayers, she’d been bested more than once. She covered it well, at least she thought she did, with jokes and comments to let the girls think it was intended. She wasn’t nearly as fast and she wasn’t as strong as she once was. There hadn’t been any open wounds but bruises took longer to go away and a good hot bath wasn’t so much a luxury as a necessity. Spike teased her about her lengthy baths. She didn’t think he noticed that she was taking Motrin twice a day or that he wasn’t the only one losing weight.
Buffy hadn’t mentioned it to anyone and considered talking to Dr. Graham about it. She said she had a familiarity with vampire and slayer physiology. Maybe she could shed some light on what was going on. It wasn’t a concern until now. Of late, Buffy's life had become cushy. Her strength and speed were no longer needed except for demonstration purposes. Now her life depended on it. More than ever, she wanted to live. Maybe while everyone was in research mode she’d throw in a hypothetical question about slayer prophecies regarding diminishing powers. It would be tricky. Spike had a way of hearing things she never said.
~~~
The New Council Academy for Exceptional Girls was holding it’s own after a week of horror, loss, sorrow, and disruption. Everyone, down to the last employee knew the ordeal wasn’t nearly over, but at least things had quieted down a bit.
For all persons connected with the school, and most especially for the girls, the Council arranged a private memorial service. The girls needed to grieve. It was the best they could do until the body was released. The Council had assumed guardianship of Chastity when she came to the school and now held the responsibility for final arrangements. Giles asked Xander to investigate the “ownership” of the graveyard adjacent to the school. He hoped that the Council could take over its stewardship and provide a burial place for Chastity…. and others connected with the school, and the Council, for that matter….if they so wished, himself included. It wasn’t anything he’d ever given thought to before, but now, the notion seemed correct.
The Memorial Service was tasteful, open only to the staff and students. An invitation was extended to the parents of the other girls. Giles was grateful when none chose to attend but many sent condolences in the form of financial gifts for a memorial or a scholarship in Chastity’s name. Others sent telegrams expressing their support for the school. He was surprised that not one parent or guardian called in anger, demanding answers as to how such a tragedy could occur. It saddened him and reinforced the notion that they were relieved to be free of their vexatious daughters. Lydia Chalmers served as mistress of ceremonies.
After a non-denominational prayer service, anyone who wished said a few words. Funeral rituals commonly bring tears, Giles thought, for no other reason than they remind us of our own mortality. As the girls expressed their sorrow, he observed that their comments were devoid of emotion. Not cold, exactly, but stiff and forced. Chastity hadn’t been at the school long enough to make friends. The girls cried, but Giles felt their tears were more out of fear than sorrow. Unfortunately, the media sullied the whole event as they tried to get compelling photographs of grief. It sickened him.
~~~
Giles hung up the phone after a conversation with Willow when Adele’s voice came over the intercom saying that Mr. Harris was here to see him. A smile came to his face. “Send him in, please Adele.”
“Your timing couldn’t be better, Xander. I just got off the phone with Willow. She sends her regards.”
“Geez, Giles, you’re in a chipper mood. We have asteroids tumbling into our lives and you’re positively glowing. I don’t get it,” said Xander sitting down and taking on a serious tone. “Actually, I’ve got something important to talk to you about.”
“As do I, Xander, but the word from Willow was good and any good news these days is most welcome. Allow me to bask in the moment if you don’t mind.” Giles pressed the intercom and asked Adele to step in for a moment.
“Bask away, G-man, as long as I can bask along with you. There’s good news? That’s different.”
Giles took off his glasses and reached in his vest pocket for his handkerchief. “Yes….” Giles really didn’t want to share that he asked Willow to use her influence with the Covens to cast a spell on the staff and students. The good news had to do with their success and the reassurance that no lasting effects were expected. Now he had to think fast. Come up with something that Xander would believe. Thankfully, he had a reprieve when Adele came in.
“Mr. Giles?” was all she said. Adele was a changed woman. Where she had been chatty and cheerful before, now she was sullen and withdrawn. The events of the past few weeks had taken a toll. DI Arthur’s investigation had cast suspicion on Mr. Giles as well as other staff members and planted a seed of doubt in her mind. It hurt him deeply that she would even consider the possibility that he might have committed such a horrendous crime. Still, he understood that once an element of fear emerged, someone with only a casual acquaintance might allow that seed to grow. He wanted to shout at her to stop being ridiculous, but recalled that her husband wanted to poke him in the nose over nothing more than a little disagreement. If he thought that Adele was convinced that Giles was the killer, he’d come after him guns-a-blazing.
“Ah, Mrs. Reed. As you know, I wasn’t expecting Mr. Harris but as it happens there are some things I need to go over with him. Would you be kind enough to bring his file as well as Ms. Summers file… and one more thing….maybe some tea?” With her attitude of late he feared she was going to tell him to get his own damned tea. She agreed without a fuss, so maybe things weren’t as bad as he feared.
“My file, Giles? Should I be concerned? I came to see you, remember? You’re supposed to be wondering what I wanted, not making me wonder what you want…that’s the way it works.”
“Yes, yes, I know that,” Giles said, becoming impatient. “Let’s just wait until Adele brings the files and tea, alright?” After an awkward silence, Giles went on, “Tell me now, have you seen the inspector again? Do you know how the investigation is going? What about this damn spreadsheet he’s so proud of? Is it telling him anything we don’t already know?”
“Wow!” Xander said, sitting up straighter in his chair. “That was a boatload of questions…important questions. Did you ever think he might have your office bugged?” he said, glancing around the office with suspicion. “I think you’re the prime suspect. Maybe you should be choosing your words more carefully.”
“Bugged?” cried Giles. Adele brought in the files and the tea on a tray with biscuits.
“Bugs?” She said nearly dropping the tray. “Where? Should I call the exterminator?”
Xander jumped in for the rescue, “No, not bugs, Mrs. Reed. I told Mr. Giles he bugged me and he was offended. Do you know what that means, Mrs. Reed?”
“Indeed I do, Mr. Harris. It means you feel that Mr. Giles is getting under your skin. Making you itchy…bugging you.” She raised her chin indignantly and said, “I’m sure if that’s true, Mr. Harris, you needed a thorough bugging.” With that, she turned on her heel and left the room.
“Great G. I cover your ass and get mine whipped!”
Giles smiled. “I’m rarely that lucky.” Turning somber, he said, “Now, are you honestly concerned that this office may be bugged?”
“Stranger things have happened, my man… and if they got a warrant for surveillance, they can use anything you said against you.”
With a mouth full of cookie, Giles mumbled, “So, what do I do….um….sweep for bugs…that is the right term, isn’t it?”
“Sheesh, I don’t know.” Xander was stuck for a moment, it sounded like Giles really wanted his advice…this was unexpected. He thought a bit and then said, “What about calling Willow? I may have gotten you upset over nothing. She’s got all kinds of protection spells going right? Maybe there’s nothing to be concerned about…you know?…all lines blocked and all?”
“Right you are. I’ll call her now.” He picked up the phone and then paused, “But you wanted to talk to me about something important, something strange. Stranger than usual, I presume,” Giles said, reaching for another cookie.
For a second Xander was startled. He had come here with one purpose and had been distracted by at least three different things in the meantime. “Oh! Right…. um…. yeah….it’s kind of awkward.” He cleared his throat. “Um…I don’t know where to start.”
Giles put the phone down carefully and stared at Xander, expressionless. “Now I am concerned. Go on.”
“OK. Straight out with it. I’m worried about Buffy.”
Giles did not react at all, just said an elongated, “Yes.”
“Yes.” Xander replied as he squirmed in his seat. “I think there’s something wrong with her. When we patrol she is extra careful. She hasn’t fought with anything since…well, since I don’t know when. If we see tracks or signs that there is something around she just “takes note” and says she’ll come back in the daylight to check it out. She lets me take the lead… me!”
Giles took a deep breath before speaking. “Isn’t it possible there isn’t anything out there? We’ve been here almost two years and weren’t aware of any demonic activity…although, now I realize we were living in a fool’s paradise and chose not to see the signs.”
“No. A couple of times when her super strength was called for and she didn’t have the stuff. She made a joke and blew it off saying since Spike is here she feels all girly and lets him be the man! But that doesn’t wash because he’s laid up…so much for manliness.”
“Alright, this is to go no further than this room, do you understand?” Giles said, standing. He walked around his desk.
“What makes this different than anything else? Of course I understand. Geez , Giles, you act like this is my first time round the block.”
Giles stared him down. “I’ve noticed the same behavior myself. I even asked if she was ill. She denied it vehemently. The only thing I could get her to admit to was that she and Spike were having some difficulties. She refused to elaborate….” He paused, “for …which …I was eternally grateful. I do not wish to know the particulars of their relationship. I have a vivid imagination and prefer not to dwell on what they do in their alone time.”
“With you on that one, chief.”
Continuing, Giles said, “Still, I can understand that something wrong between them would take a toll on Buffy’s psyche. I remember a time in the past when she was so lost that I feared she no longer had a will to go on and as such was a danger to herself. Do you think something like that may be happening now?”
“Honestly? No. It’s as if she’s afraid of getting hurt. Maybe what happened to Spike has done a number on her.”
Giles returned to his seat. “Xander, I want to thank you for coming to me with this. I’m not sure how to handle it. Maybe I’ll talk to Leah Graham about it. I think the Holiday gathering and Dawn being here may help. At the very least, Dawn may get her to talk and find out what’s troubling her.”
“Hey man, you know I’ve always loved her a little more than I should. I worry about her.” Xander rose to leave. “I’ll catch you later.” Startled by the remark, Giles glanced up just in time to see the door close.
~~~
Thanksgiving was nearly upon them. Dawn would be arriving Wednesday evening. Giles had already arranged for Pinthistle to pick her up at the airport. In the meantime a small war was brewing regarding Dawn staying in the dorm.
Spike said: She shouldn’t stay in the dorm because it may not be safe.
Buffy said: What could be safer than being with thirty slayers? She shouldn’t stay in the cottage because you’re convalescing. She should stay in the dorm because there’s really no room for her in the cottage.
Spike said: She’s your sister, where else should she stay but with family
Buffy said: There’s no room in the cottage.
Spike said: She doesn’t take up much room. What about her privacy?
Buffy said: What about our privacy?
And on and on it went.
To the outward observer, life in True Love Cottage (named by MacGregor and turned into Twisted Love Cottage by Xander) was nothing short of Paradise. Buffy had become the perfect caretaker. She saw to Spike’s every need, and Spike was gracious in return. As the swelling went down and the discoloration ebbed, Spike was up and about as much as Buffy allowed.
Anyone who knew Spike at all knew that he was usually in a state of perpetual motion. The limitations of movement and blood restriction further agitated him. Dr. Graham left Spike in charge of his blood intake, as he was nothing else if not responsible where Buffy’s safety was concerned. Unable to prove his strength with smash and bash, he sought to demonstrate his strength through will power and allowed himself only six ounces of pig blood every other day. He quoted the doctor who insisted that slowing his metabolism would increase the probability of beating this thing. With too much time on his hands, the one thought that consumed his thoughts was that he might not beat this thing. Life was playing the cruelest trick of all.
He was a man of more than average intelligence. That was a truth even before he was turned. Now, with nearly 150 years of living and exposure to all that had happened to the world in that time, he was a veritable encyclopedia of knowledge and he knew how to use it. It all went for naught when his heart did his thinking. Spike knew he was hurting Buffy and he was helpless to stop. He loved her with all that he was, but he feared that he was no longer whole. Their relationship was so much more than sex but he couldn’t ignore that part of it. They were perfect sexual partners, all at once wild and tender, passionate and sweet. He worried that he could no longer….do his part….and was terrified to find out. Rather than deal with it, he avoided being alone with her…in fact, he avoided being alone with her at all.
Buffy never said a word about it. She didn’t need to. He saw the hurt in her eyes every time she tried to be near him. He would pretend to be asleep when she came in the room or keep MacGregor talking until she was too tired and went to bed. He made sure he showered when she wasn’t there. Showering together had always been a special time for them. Now, Dawn was coming and could stay at the cottage….maybe that would give him the time he needed to work things out.
Buffy knew well enough that they were in trouble, but she really didn’t have any clue what was happening. All she knew was that once again, she was alone. It was killing her, she was sure of it. She felt herself weakening every day and it was because she could not face another loss. There were too many losses in her life and now she was losing Spike. What was the point of going on if it meant going on without him? She knew the signs. She remembered when her parents divorced. Whatever room her Mom and Dad were in together was always cold, tense. Now, she felt it whenever she walked into the cottage and every night as she slept alone. As she frantically tried to reason why this was happening, she decided that he must have known he would tire of her and that was why he didn’t try to find her when he came back. Her one hope was that they could find healing in an embrace. Dr. Graham said that Spike’s wound was healed. Thanksgiving was coming. Dawn would be visiting but she was going to stay at the dorm. MacGregor wouldn’t come over the holiday. Maybe that would give them time alone to be in one another’s arms.
~~~
X-posted - captured_kiss, spikes_fic, spuffy_fic