The List (Kingdom Hearts, no pairing)
Title: The List
Author: belladonna12
Rating: PG
Word count: 527
Summary: Highlights from the do not do list…
A/N: I humbly apologize if this isn’t my best work ever, I’ve been extremely sidetracked when it comes to ficcing this springkink, first with a job, then with moving. I also apologize for all fics turned in after their proper dates, as I have no home internet, and the nearest library with internet is a three mile walk. I will try to do better.
Disclaimer: I don’t own the ideas for Kingdom Hearts, nor am I making any money off of this.
Prompt: Kingdom Hearts, Organization XIII: Crazy behavior/zaniness - "101 Things I'm No Longer Allowed to Do In The Organization"
The List
List Title:
101 Things I’m No Longer Allowed to do in The Organization
(as compiled by Vexen)
Number 73: I will not Noogie Saix.
Example: Superior discovered three armored figures heading for rec room couch. Figures identified as Axel, Larxene, and Demyx. All three proceeded to surround Saix. On count of three, a noogie (Noogie: Noun, the hitting of the head, shoulder. Or arm, accompanied by a twisting motion.) was performed to Saix’s head. Berserker rage followed. 1/3 of castle destroyed, offender’s snack and game privileges revoked.
Number 91: The Organization is not a fraternity, and does not have initiation rites.
Example: Saix phoned from local jail on world labeled as ‘Smallville’. Axel and Luxord persuaded him through blackmail to help them initiate Number 13 (recently labeled Roxas). Said initiation required copious amounts of alcoholic beverages and attempting to tip over cattle. Enraged bull, damaged crops and fences. Bail posted, farm family Kent paid damages. Offenders assigned dish washing detail and fined ten thousand munny each.
Number 1: I will not run Xemnas’ underwear up the flagpole and call a meeting under it.
Example: Stricken from record at the Superior’s own request. Offender listed as Larxene. Punishment abstained due to time of month.
Number 54: I will not sneak hair remover into Xaldin’s shampoo.
Example: On X Day of XXXX, unidentified substance was added to Xaldin’s sandalwood shampoo. Substance caused Xaldin’s hair to fall out. Confession Dragooned (literally) out of Roxas. Offender forced to pay witch for hair growing spell.
Number 13: I will NOT touch Xemnas’ seasalt ice cream.
Example: Offender not yet caught. Penalty to be extracted has not yet been defined.
Number 25: The gaming systems are a privilege, not a right.
Example: Xigbar desired to play game series Hitman. Namine busy playing game labeled Devil Summoner. Discussion ensued. T.V. and PS2 destroyed by shots, Xigbar sketched into female form for a week. Xigbar forced to pay for replacement equipment, game, and new game for Namine. Namine required to return Xigbar to normal.
Number 30: NO pets.
Example: This means that Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal, Saix.
Number 67: No one may repaint the walls any color.
Example: Marluxia responsible for unauthorized repainting to blue and green. Petition from other members to keep the color scheme denied. Marluxia forced to repaint place white and gray. Appeal in works.
Number 82: Friday is not karaoke day.
Example: Demyx brought in the machine and Axel the drinks. Inebriated Zexion seems to think he’s a male stripper. Zexion fined 100 munny for indecent exposure, Demyx put on Shadow hunting patrol.
Number 4: Hobby items and messes must be contained.
Example: This is your final warning, Lexaeus. One more splatter of clay in the main hall and you WILL be demoted.
Number 100: Luxord may not take advantage of other Organization members weaknesses.
Example: Bribing members to do chores, rigged games. (Note: I have entered Gambler’s Anonymous to counter my blackjack habit.)
Number 101: Keyblades are not toys.
Example: Axel, keep your hands off Roxas’ keyblades. Roxas, quit using your keeyblades to open doors that are locked. Subsequent violations will result in a talking to from the Superior.
Fin
Any suggestions?