Looney Tunes (Bugs/Elmer)
Title: Mistress Bunny’s House of Spank
Author/Artist: GuiltyRed
Beta: YohjiDeranged
Rating: NC17
Warnings: BDSM, complete and total crack
Word count: 592
Summary: Elmer Fudd is reunited with old friends.
Prompt: July 26 - #27. Looney Tunes, Bugs/Elmer: Crossdressing/Seduction - "You're not very good at hiding those "unnatural" feelings, you know?"
A/N: What happens when a Looney Tunes fan watches those episodes of CSI featuring Mistress Heather a few times too many? You’re about to find out.
The heavy door swung shut behind him. Elmer flinched at the sound, his hands rolling his cap into a tight knot.
“I was wondering when you’d drop in.”
The familiar voice had come from above. Elmer craned his neck and looked up to the top of the wide, sweeping staircase.
A vision in fur and leather stood there, impossibly tall in thigh-high, spike-heeled boots. One delicate hand held a coiled whip.
“I pwomised I’d visit,” Elmer mumbles, blushing furiously.
The mistress of the house descended the stairs slowly, each step precise. Reaching the foyer, the mistress reached up and rang a small brass bell: once, twice, thrice.
The door to the slave quarters opened, and a figure trotted out. An elaborate series of knots bound his arms behind his back and forced his head up, his chest forward and his rump into the air. He wore long pointy ears and a fluffy tail that flashed white against his ebony plumage.
“Is the Valkyrie room ready?” A graceful hand removed the golden, carrot-shaped bit so the slave might reply.
“Yeth, mithtreth,” the slave murmured around a numb tongue.
With a satisfied smile, his mistress replaced the bit and patted him on the head. “Very good. You may find your playmate and indulge yourselves. You have two hours.”
Elmer swallowed hard as he watched the slave scamper off. He didn’t want to think about that fluffy tail, but it haunted his thoughts just as it had for years now. He was so distracted that he didn’t hear the stiletto heels approach.
The coiled whip touched his chin, gently tilted his head up.
“Heh heh heh heh heh!” Elmer brayed nervous laughter as he gazed into the face of his most desperate fantasy: Bugs Bunny in a leather corset.
“Eh, what’s up, doc?” Bugs drawled, trailing the whip down Elmer’s chest.
Elmer blushed three shades of crimson and looked like he was about to faint.
Bugs wrapped a loop of the whip behind his neck like a leash. “Follow me. From now on, you do not speak unless spoken to, do you understand?”
“Y-y-y-yes, sir! Madam! Mistwess!”
“You may call me Mistress,” Bugs continued as though Elmer had not spoken. He led the hapless hunter up the wide staircase and into a candlelit tableau. “I have arranged a special vignette just for you, doc.”
Elmer gaped. The room was huge, with flower-bedecked columns and a high marble altar. At its base waited the valkyrie’s horse: a plump pink fellow wearing a flowered wig and sporting an elaborate tail that seemed to jut from between his soft round buttocks.
“Take off your clothes, slave. Then put these on.”
Elmer hurried to obey, though his hands fumbled and his trousers didn’t want to drop on command. When he finally managed to don the appropriate gear, he looked up to see if his mistress was pleased.
Bugs regarded the gleaming breastplate and leathern skirt with silent approval. He reached out and adjusted the horned helmet, placing it at a rakish angle on the shiny bald head. “Now. Is there something you’ve been wanting to say to me?”
Elmer dropped to one knee, arms spread wide as he began to sing. “Oh, Bwunhiwde, you’we so wovewy!”
“Yes, I know,” Bugs purred, crouching down and reaching under Elmer’s skirt. “I can’t help it.”
Voice cracking, Elmer still managed to sing the next part, though he ran out of breath halfway through. “Oh, Bwunhiwde, be my wuv!”
Bugs smirked, his whiskers flicking ominously. “Sure thing, doc. Turn around and bend over.”
Th-th-th-that’s All, Folks!