Hers, Mine, Ours, or Everyone Else's?
Growing up, I've always heard that your wedding day is "Your Wife's Big Day!". Everyone always said that you should go all out and let her make it just like she's always dreamed it would be. Well this is fine, but is it really 'her' day? I admit that I wanted my wedding day to be perfect, but I know it wasn't 'my' day alone either. I went into it believing that it was 'our' day together, but I'm still not so sure.
After we got the house, it didn't take very long before it started to feel like home. Living alone wasn't so bad either. I actually kind of enjoyed being alone, although it would have been more enjoyable with all the regular comforts of home. Sure I had my bed and my computer, but no furniture can be annoying. Again, it didn't take long to remedy any problems I was having. Lesley already had just about every kitchen device known to man. She had been buying things for years. Some things she had two of, so I guess those extras will get handed over to her sister. We also had two or three housewarming/wedding showers where we got loads of stuff to make the house perfect.
The wedding was coming up pretty quickly. We had originally planned to hire someone to decorate and handle all of the food, but this proved to be too damn expensive. I couldn't see forking out over $2000 for someone else to come in and set some things up. When I told Lesley that I thought we could do everything ourselves, she was really worried. We began scouting out different stores and she soon realized that we actually could put it together almost as nicely as the people we were considering hiring. It's ridiculous how much they can charge you. For instance, the cheapest person we found was going to charge $80 per table for decorations which would include a table cloth with some kind of centerpiece. We ended up borrowing table cloths from a friend whose sister was married not too long before. We bought some things to make centerpieces with and after we were finished, we'd probably spent approximately $100 for ALL of the tables. A lady that Lesley works with volunteered to help her figure out a layout and put the flower arrangements together. And our families also helped with the decorating. Overall, we didn't spend even half of the $2000 price we were given.
Despite Lesley's skepticism, we were able to make the wedding exactly what she wanted. The original plan was to be married outside somewhere, but due to weather concerns we decided not to go that route. Neither of us are very religious people, but we decided we would be married in a church. There was limited prayer during the ceremony and all music was definitely secular and there were no Bible hymns. The day was beautiful. It was great to see all of our family and friends there to wish us well and share the experience with us. The whole ceremony was perfect. She looked more beautiful than I had ever seen her look. Watching her walk down the aisle to meet me is a mental image I will never forget. At that point everyone else seemed to disappear and it was just the two of us standing there. This was the culmination of 5 years of dating. We were finally truly one.
There are lots of wonderful memories from that day, but at the same time, there were a lot of things that were very trying. We were like sheep or cattle. Upon arriving at the church, we were herded into dressing rooms where we got dressed. Then directed to have our individual pictures made with our families and the bridal party members. Then it was back to the dressing room to wait until the ceremony was to start. After the ceremony, we were rushed downstairs to have pictures made eating cake and by this time we were starving and just wanted to sit down and eat, but there were pictures to be made back upstairs. We were rushed back upstairs and put in all kinds of poses with many different people. Everything was such a huge rush. Finally we got back downstairs so we could eat. Well, it's almost impossible to eat when there is a line of people up to your table. It's nice to be congratulated and to know that everyone wishes you the best of luck, but we were worn out and just wanted to eat in peace. I looked around and was watching everyone running around, talking, gossiping, living it up, and eating loads of food. As soon as we were finished eating, we were rushed off to change clothes and do the garter/bouquet throws. After that, we were practically pushed out the door to our car where we were attacked by thousands of bubbles.
When we left the church we talked about it and decided that it wasn't her day, it wasn't my day, it wasn't even our day. That day made us married, but it was really for everyone else's enjoyment. We were just pinballs bouncing around until the game was over. We decorated everything and had loads of food, but we didn't get to enjoy any of it. The vows were for us, but was the whole overall occasion? No, it wasn't for us, it was for everyone else
After we got the house, it didn't take very long before it started to feel like home. Living alone wasn't so bad either. I actually kind of enjoyed being alone, although it would have been more enjoyable with all the regular comforts of home. Sure I had my bed and my computer, but no furniture can be annoying. Again, it didn't take long to remedy any problems I was having. Lesley already had just about every kitchen device known to man. She had been buying things for years. Some things she had two of, so I guess those extras will get handed over to her sister. We also had two or three housewarming/wedding showers where we got loads of stuff to make the house perfect.
The wedding was coming up pretty quickly. We had originally planned to hire someone to decorate and handle all of the food, but this proved to be too damn expensive. I couldn't see forking out over $2000 for someone else to come in and set some things up. When I told Lesley that I thought we could do everything ourselves, she was really worried. We began scouting out different stores and she soon realized that we actually could put it together almost as nicely as the people we were considering hiring. It's ridiculous how much they can charge you. For instance, the cheapest person we found was going to charge $80 per table for decorations which would include a table cloth with some kind of centerpiece. We ended up borrowing table cloths from a friend whose sister was married not too long before. We bought some things to make centerpieces with and after we were finished, we'd probably spent approximately $100 for ALL of the tables. A lady that Lesley works with volunteered to help her figure out a layout and put the flower arrangements together. And our families also helped with the decorating. Overall, we didn't spend even half of the $2000 price we were given.
Despite Lesley's skepticism, we were able to make the wedding exactly what she wanted. The original plan was to be married outside somewhere, but due to weather concerns we decided not to go that route. Neither of us are very religious people, but we decided we would be married in a church. There was limited prayer during the ceremony and all music was definitely secular and there were no Bible hymns. The day was beautiful. It was great to see all of our family and friends there to wish us well and share the experience with us. The whole ceremony was perfect. She looked more beautiful than I had ever seen her look. Watching her walk down the aisle to meet me is a mental image I will never forget. At that point everyone else seemed to disappear and it was just the two of us standing there. This was the culmination of 5 years of dating. We were finally truly one.
There are lots of wonderful memories from that day, but at the same time, there were a lot of things that were very trying. We were like sheep or cattle. Upon arriving at the church, we were herded into dressing rooms where we got dressed. Then directed to have our individual pictures made with our families and the bridal party members. Then it was back to the dressing room to wait until the ceremony was to start. After the ceremony, we were rushed downstairs to have pictures made eating cake and by this time we were starving and just wanted to sit down and eat, but there were pictures to be made back upstairs. We were rushed back upstairs and put in all kinds of poses with many different people. Everything was such a huge rush. Finally we got back downstairs so we could eat. Well, it's almost impossible to eat when there is a line of people up to your table. It's nice to be congratulated and to know that everyone wishes you the best of luck, but we were worn out and just wanted to eat in peace. I looked around and was watching everyone running around, talking, gossiping, living it up, and eating loads of food. As soon as we were finished eating, we were rushed off to change clothes and do the garter/bouquet throws. After that, we were practically pushed out the door to our car where we were attacked by thousands of bubbles.
When we left the church we talked about it and decided that it wasn't her day, it wasn't my day, it wasn't even our day. That day made us married, but it was really for everyone else's enjoyment. We were just pinballs bouncing around until the game was over. We decorated everything and had loads of food, but we didn't get to enjoy any of it. The vows were for us, but was the whole overall occasion? No, it wasn't for us, it was for everyone else