Christmas Cards from Fake Families

Dec 17, 2014 10:21

Rollick introduced me to a Christmas card exchange organized by a Chicago writer where the cards you write and receive are not from your actual family but from a family that each participant made up. After I read the description mocking cards that are all about bragging how great your year is, I immediately had an idea for mine but I wasn't sure if it would be appropriate. So I scanned ones from last year poster on the organizer's website and the first one I randomly selected was post-Apocaltyptic. Feeling justified I wrote and sent this to five strangers. I hope they enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Our Friends,

This time each year when the days grow short and sometimes the daystar does not even appear at all to share its false comfort, I always enjoy looking back at the dark deeds my family performed in the past year beneath the watchful eyes of those beyond the stars. While the unenlightened festoon their homes with artificial illumination in order to ward away the darkness, I hope you have enjoyed the maddened whispers that can be heard in the chill winter winds as much as I have.

This was a big year for me. I took the bold step of assassinating my master within the cult of Nyarlathotep. While there was certainly a bumpy period of adjustment to my new position, I think my fellows now agree my promotion was a great decision for the organization at large. While it is hard to interpret the feedback of the masked lords I now directly report to, I believe they too are highly satisfied with my performance.

The biggest challenge has been delegating some of my old responsibilities. I’ve always been a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to sacrifice selection and I know from personal experience that you don’t want to give your subordinates too much work to do or they’ll start getting ambitions of their own. A bit of a culling might be in order come spring.

My increased responsibilities do keep my away from home a bit more, but I always make an effort to spend quality time with my family. My husband loves sharing his progress in deciphering hidden messages from the Black Pharaoh left within Egyptian hieroglyphs. The Book of the Dead has been well-plumbed by other researchers, but his work analyzing more obscure texts appears to be bearing fruit. Over the summer, we took a trip to the ruins of Gaza with the kids and had a wonderful time together exploring ancient crypts looking for snippets of parchment and taking notes on the words the priests scrawled in their own blood upon the crumbling walls.

Speaking of the kids, Jezebel is truly excelling in her studies. I believe she has inherited her father’s knack for dead languages and her teachers speak very highly of her performance in school rituals. Ethan is a natural athlete, and has taken up jogging each morning and practicing his dagger forms in the evening. I know someday he’ll put those talents to great use chasing down curious interlopers.

I hope next year will be just as fulfilling as we continue to work toward the awakening of the Old Ones and the return to glorious, primal madness.

Wishing you a dark winter solstice and a bleak new year!

Marion and the Hali Family
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