(no subject)
so its a new day and a new morning.... Alex seems kinda out of it.... first he was angry this morning and now he is just.... blah... and I kinda feel helpless because its like theres nothing I can do to help. I was kinda quiet and staring out this morning.... last night falling asleep seemed distant.... I don't know what to do... I guess I want to loved.... to have a security that he used to give me when he wasn't talking to janelle.... when compassionatly say I love you.... like when he called the other night drunk... the only probablem with the message was he doesn't even remember it so its like it doesn't count.... I'm just paranoid that there is talking going on behind my back.... I'm crazy and psycho but oh well.... the only thing I can do right now, is try and support Alex the best I can and hope for a positve turnout when this is all over.... bah I feel like I spent the night up here for no reason... so I don't know why he asked me to stay.... maybe its that all I can do is be here for him and whether he needs me to be or not he will know I'm right here... out to the store....