Trick Me: Criss Angel Slash (parts 6-8)
Hello! For my first offering, I present of the epic tale of Criss Angel, Lovable Schmoopy-Oopmkins. Now, some of you might be familiar with this fic (such as it is). I did a sporking of parts one through four over here in my journal, and then the ever-talented decapod_10 presented a recap plus the smut (again, such as it is) of part five over here in weepingcock. Well, since then, our intrepid author has posted three more chapters, including some smut in chapter 8, and here I am, to share the joy with you!
Story/Series Title: Trick Me: Criss Angel Slash, parts 6-8.
Fandom: RPS with emo Gary Stu goodness.
Culprit Author's Name: QueenOfBrokenHearts.
Read It Here: If you insist. The link is to her DeviantArt gallery.
Condom Count: 2-3, depending on your sensitivity to bad grammar and the author's apparent allergy to spellcheck.
Full Species: Twinkydink.
Hair/Eye Color: Jaden, our intrepid Gary Stu hero, has hair that looks omg totally lyke Bill's from Tokio Hotel!!!1!! Aside from that, nothing remarkable.
Special Possessions: Unusual amounts of estrogen for a pair of grown men.
Annoying Origins: The fifth circle of hell, and the lack of funding in public schools.
Annoying Special Abilities: Our OC has the uncanny ability to make women squeal and jump him just by walking past them. No, really.
Connection to Canon: Criss Angel is a magician. And that's about it.
Fetishes/Squicks: Gothy emo boys doing each other. Normally I approve of this. However, I also approve of good writing.
As the curtain opens on part six, things have been going well for our main characters. Jaden, age 27, is a Las Vegas bartender who is so totally not Bill from Tokio Hotel you guys, so totally not, just has his hair and looks just like him and everything. (Seriously, I keep asking myself why she didn't just write really improbable RPS instead of creating an OC, because I'm almost positive that was her original intention.) Anyhoo, Jaden and Criss are in twoo wub with one another, and have shown it by doing each other's nails and having badly-written hot tub sex. But then, oh noes! Seems Jaden's abusive ex-boyfriend, or one of many of them at any rate, has escaped from prison and is coming for him! DUN DUN DUNNN.
I have made no changes to the writing, just put it in italics.
Jada had told me to hide in the closet, but that made me think"What if he looks in the closet"
Jaden's sister is named Jada. Anybody else think their parents should be shot? Jaden's brilliant escape plan, rather than hide in the closet, is to climb out the fire escape and go a few floors down, then call 911 from there.
"-11 please state weather you have a fire, medical, police, or other type of emergency." The operator said. "I have spotted the prisoner who escaped earlyer to day. Shawn Deming. He's in the presidential suite at the Luxor hotel" I tell her. "We'll send the police right away. Would you like me to stay and help you stay calm untill the police arive?" She asks.
It really is one giant block of text like that, by the way, because apparently the "new paragraph every time somebody speaks" rule escaped this individual. Also, isn't the Luxor a giant pyramid? Does it even have external fire escapes that you can reach by climbing out the window? (No, really, I haven't been to Las Vegas in ages.)
And then, cue the emo!
"Is there anyone else in the suite besides Shawn?" The woman asks. "Yes. Criss Angel is there I think Shawn is jelous because He's an ex boyfriend of mine and...and...he used to beat me...last time I called 911, I had just slashed my wrist because I couldn't take it." I whimper.
This is the second time, in six very brief chapters, that this has been touched on. BY THE WAY, READERS, IN CASE YOU FORGOT, JADEN? HIS LIFE IS SO TRAGIC. Dear God, crank up the My Chemical Romance and cry moar. (Disclaimer: I like My Chemical Romance.)
"I don't know how he found me. Or how he got to Vegas without getting caught. I was dating him when I lived in Fall River...And I think he just hurt Criss.." I say, I'm sobbing now.
Or how he made it up to the presidential suite of a very busy hotel that presumably has a lot of big armed security guards. Or how he knew that Criss just so happened to be up in the Luxor's presidential suite in the first place. Or how he escaped from the east coast and made it to Vegas in the course of one day without hopping a plane. Logic? We don't need your stinking Earth logic!
So what does Jaden do once he thinks he hears Criss being shot? Why, he goes right back upstairs to face an escaped convict. Smart! Criss is laying on the floor, but there doesn't seem to be any blood. Perhaps he's magically holding it all in. And there's Shawn at the door! Gasp!
"So, you've got yourself a pretty little boyfriend eh?" Shawn said. I can't say anything. "A little magician doing card tricks and sawing whores in half? A prissy little gothic boy to paint your nails?"
That line wouldn't be nearly as funny if Criss hadn't given Jaden a mani-pedi in chapter three. No, really.
I take out the carpet cutter that usually resides in my pocket, and Shawn pulls out his gun. If the police don't show up there's one way out of this situation, and it isn't the fire escape.
I actually assumed, the first time I read this, that Jaden's first action upon being cornered wouldn't be to cut Shawn, but to slit his own wrists. It just seems to gel more with his characterization as the world's whiniest emo boy. And remember, he's supposed to be 27.
Part seven graced the world a few hours after part six was posted. The world (read: me and my friends) rejoiced.
No. I would'nt be able to get out of the room through the window, Shawn would folow me.
...Down the side of a pyramid-shaped building.
But just as I got the carpet cutter ready, and Just as Shawn cocked his gun, the swat team bursts through the door along with the regular police.
The swat team? Was that really necessary? It seems kinda like using a stick of dynamite to kill a fly.
"Jaden Steinenger?" A woman officer asks. "Yes." I reply. "My name is Wedy Come with me, There's an ambulance waiting downstairs, Jeffree and I will help carry Criss down."
Her name is pronounced Weedy in my mind. And did the other cop really have to be named Jeffree, after we were assured in chapter one that Jaden here is so totally not related to Jeffree Star? Because that's all I'm envisioning right now, and it's hurting my head--and I don't even really know who the guy is, I've just seen pictures. Furthermore, why are there no paramedics accompanying the police? Are they all just chilling downstairs at the buffet or something?
Criss stirred while he was being carried by the officers. "Where's Jaden? Is he alright? Where's Jaden?" He beggs.
THRILL at the random tense changes!
"I was so worried that you'd end up hurt." He whispered. "I think I was about ten times more worried than you where." I reply.
The author seems convinced that where = past tense of are. This error has cropped up consistently across all chapters of the story, and none of the reviewers has bothered to inform her that she's doing it wrong.
He wasn't in the mood for any bad publicity, his wife had just left him, he had been caught, still alive hanging around America's disaster AKA Britney Spears, and now this.
Ordinarily I wouldn't argue with a pot-shot at Britney Spears, but this just comes out of ass-nowhere. At least the whole wife leaving thing was previously touched on.
Now it was going to get out that Criss liked guys too, and that his boyfriend's crazy ex had shown up and wanted to kill them both. I could'nt help but feel that the whole thing was my fault. But I also couldnt help but think, If I had'nt met Criss, Shawn probably would have found me and killed me.
And what a tragedy that would be.
A few weeks later, I was sitting on my couch, Ipod in my ears, flipping through a magazine about drums and other musical instruments,
1. I don't think the iPod is actually supposed to be inserted into your ear canals, sir.
2. I don't know what it is about the phrasing of 'drums and other musical instruments' that bothers me, but something does.
Criss calls Jaden up and asks him to meet him at a certain address and tells him to dress nice. Oh, and calls him Jadey. Jaden calls him Crissy. Yeah. To quote mynameishelen: "I look forward to the next chapter when Crissyface will probably put a bandaid on Jadeypops' scraped knee after kissing it better."
I had just pulled out tight black dress pants, a red button-down that matched my hair and a black tie.
There are no colors in this author's universe aside from black and red. While I approve of this color scheme, some variations would be nice. Jaden's bedroom is all black and red too. Perhaps black like his soul and red like the blood from his slit wrists.
I roll the sleeves of the shirt up to my elbows, because that's how I like it, and I'm off. I'm half way down the hall way when I realize that I'm not wearing any shoes.
GASP as Jaden nearly leaves his apartment without footwear!
It turns out that the address he was given is the nicest restaurant in town. How, I ask, does Jaden not know where the nicest restaurant in Las Vegas is located if he lives there and apparently has for a while? But I digress. There's a woman and two other men already in the booth, and...
The first thing out of the woman is "OH HE'S JUST SO CUTE!! " as she jumps out of the booth, knocking criss out of his seat and runs up to hug me.
Holy crap. This is not the first time people have had this reaction to Jaden. It makes me wonder why all these people apparently lack any ounce of self-control.
Why, why I ask, are all women like this to me?
I got nothin'.
Chapter eight opens with the wtf-inducing revelation that the woman who just jumped Jadeykin's ass out of nowhere is Criss' mother. If my mother did that to my girlfriend, I'd be very disturbed. But hey, at least she likes him.
"So is Jaden joining the Mindfeak crew?" Costa asks. "Sure" I reply.
Way to invite yourself, Jaden.
"Christopher, don't make him go to any of the stupid things you do!" His mother warned. "JD says you plan on burrying yourself alive this season. You'd better not drag him along unless he wants to come"
I like how she's not worried about her own son's safety, but is terribly concerned about this stranger who she met five minutes ago. Though I guess maybe she's gotten used to Criss doing crazy dangerous things.
Crissy gets to sleep over at my house tonight.
lyke omg you guys we can do each other's hair and talk about boys and give each other makeovers and have pillow fights yey! Wtf, they're grown men, did Criss have to ask permission?
I open the door to the little place and as soo as the door shuts, he grabs me by the waist and starts unbuttoning my shirt.
And now it's time to venture into this author's patented brand of wtf-inducing semi-smut. While it's not particularly urply, it presents a case for why fourteen year old girls should not write gay sex. Or any sex.
I don't answer, his lips make contact with my neck and I cant hold back a little moan."Jaden, I love you." He whispers. It's only been a couple of months, but I believe him.
You can always believe a guy if he says he loves you when he's trying to get in your pants!
He slides my shirt off of my shoulders and tells me to lay face down on the couch. I do as he says and i feel him straddle my back.
Buttsecks: You're doing it wrong. Or not, because it turns out Criss just wants to give Jaden a massage. Yeah, that's realistic.
Just when I feel like I could fall asleep any second, he speaks. "Would it be alright if I left a mark?"He sighs.
Jaden: Okay, but just make sure it's somewhere that my parents won't see it.
I thought he was going to hurt me for a second, but then i felt him start sucking on my neck and that was it for me!
...Did he seriously just orgasm from that? Is that humanly possible?
Criss and Jaden go to bed and have some cutesy-wootsy dialog, and then morning comes. Yay.
"Should we shower or something?" I suggest. "Yep." He beams, sliding off my pants and boxers."Fine then." I think as I take his boxers off and start touching him.
I don't know about you guys, but I came.
I turn on the water, and wait for it to get hot.
I think we're all waiting for it to get hot, but I, for one, am not getting my hopes up.
He picks me up and sits me on the counter.His toung slides over my neck then he kisses me. He lifts me up and sets me on my feet in the shower. He climbes in after me and runs his hands over my sides before getting lower.
She hit the floor! Next thing you know! Shorty got low low low low low low low...
I moan as his hand slides down the length and he starts playing with me. The sensation is in describable.
The first time I read that, I thought it said "the sensation is describable." Really, that would've been par for the course here.
I turn around and kiss him again, before I start playing with him.
That sounds more like they're sitting around playing with dolls or something than getting frisky in the shower. Look, it's called a penis. You don't have to be afraid to say it, author.
We keep playing and kissing untill we've both came a couple of times, and the water runs cold.
Well, that was scintillating.
He hands me a towel, which i wrap around myself in the manner a woman would. I'm not entirely sure what brought on that habbit.
Shot in the dark here, Jaden, but I think it may have something to do with the fact that you're more effeminate than myself and all my female friends, regardless of sexuality, combined.
"Arent we just the most adorable couple?" He asks.
Apparently, Criss is also more effeminate than myself and my friends combined.
So they're going to be taping some stuff for the show later, and Jaden's going to come along. Criss wants shots of Jaden in the show. Aw, how romantic.
"If you insist. There's going to be a rise in Tokio hotel fangirls watching your show if you do that. I dont understand it. I dont look as girly as he does!" I whine.
So just in case you've forgotten, Jaden looks omg just like Bill from Tokio Hotel! Zomg! If you need to get a visual aid here, go Google the band, I'll wait. For the record, this fic was discovered while looking for Criss Angel pictures because he's my friend's RP character's PB. This Bill guy is also a PB for another character, played by my girlfriend. This breaks my brain on a few additional levels. *shudder*
We get dressed and i put on a little make up and head back to his place.. We lay down on the couch, me on top, head comfortably on his chest.
Aw. Jadeykins is listening to Crissypoo's heartbeat. Have you ever seen anything more touching, I ask you?
Suddenly, Criss' brother JD arrives and starts filming them and demands that they do something cute. Oh noes! Somebody's filming them after they've gotten all prepared to be filmed!
"So Crissy tell the camera how far you've gotten." "Shut the fuck up! Who let you in?" "DUmbass you told me to shut up and then you ask me a question?"
Nothing gets me going more than a bunch of grown men acting like fifteen year old girls.
"Lets see something cute." "NO" I get up, and criss folows, grabbing the camera from JD and shutting it off.
And that, my friends, is the end of chapter 8 of this magnum opus. I ask you all, has there ever been a more riveting tale of love, loss, and human nature? I'm so overwhelmed.
Story/Series Title: Trick Me: Criss Angel Slash, parts 6-8.
Fandom: RPS with emo Gary Stu goodness.
Culprit Author's Name: QueenOfBrokenHearts.
Read It Here: If you insist. The link is to her DeviantArt gallery.
Condom Count: 2-3, depending on your sensitivity to bad grammar and the author's apparent allergy to spellcheck.
Full Species: Twinkydink.
Hair/Eye Color: Jaden, our intrepid Gary Stu hero, has hair that looks omg totally lyke Bill's from Tokio Hotel!!!1!! Aside from that, nothing remarkable.
Special Possessions: Unusual amounts of estrogen for a pair of grown men.
Annoying Origins: The fifth circle of hell, and the lack of funding in public schools.
Annoying Special Abilities: Our OC has the uncanny ability to make women squeal and jump him just by walking past them. No, really.
Connection to Canon: Criss Angel is a magician. And that's about it.
Fetishes/Squicks: Gothy emo boys doing each other. Normally I approve of this. However, I also approve of good writing.
As the curtain opens on part six, things have been going well for our main characters. Jaden, age 27, is a Las Vegas bartender who is so totally not Bill from Tokio Hotel you guys, so totally not, just has his hair and looks just like him and everything. (Seriously, I keep asking myself why she didn't just write really improbable RPS instead of creating an OC, because I'm almost positive that was her original intention.) Anyhoo, Jaden and Criss are in twoo wub with one another, and have shown it by doing each other's nails and having badly-written hot tub sex. But then, oh noes! Seems Jaden's abusive ex-boyfriend, or one of many of them at any rate, has escaped from prison and is coming for him! DUN DUN DUNNN.
I have made no changes to the writing, just put it in italics.
Jada had told me to hide in the closet, but that made me think"What if he looks in the closet"
Jaden's sister is named Jada. Anybody else think their parents should be shot? Jaden's brilliant escape plan, rather than hide in the closet, is to climb out the fire escape and go a few floors down, then call 911 from there.
"-11 please state weather you have a fire, medical, police, or other type of emergency." The operator said. "I have spotted the prisoner who escaped earlyer to day. Shawn Deming. He's in the presidential suite at the Luxor hotel" I tell her. "We'll send the police right away. Would you like me to stay and help you stay calm untill the police arive?" She asks.
It really is one giant block of text like that, by the way, because apparently the "new paragraph every time somebody speaks" rule escaped this individual. Also, isn't the Luxor a giant pyramid? Does it even have external fire escapes that you can reach by climbing out the window? (No, really, I haven't been to Las Vegas in ages.)
And then, cue the emo!
"Is there anyone else in the suite besides Shawn?" The woman asks. "Yes. Criss Angel is there I think Shawn is jelous because He's an ex boyfriend of mine and...and...he used to beat me...last time I called 911, I had just slashed my wrist because I couldn't take it." I whimper.
This is the second time, in six very brief chapters, that this has been touched on. BY THE WAY, READERS, IN CASE YOU FORGOT, JADEN? HIS LIFE IS SO TRAGIC. Dear God, crank up the My Chemical Romance and cry moar. (Disclaimer: I like My Chemical Romance.)
"I don't know how he found me. Or how he got to Vegas without getting caught. I was dating him when I lived in Fall River...And I think he just hurt Criss.." I say, I'm sobbing now.
Or how he made it up to the presidential suite of a very busy hotel that presumably has a lot of big armed security guards. Or how he knew that Criss just so happened to be up in the Luxor's presidential suite in the first place. Or how he escaped from the east coast and made it to Vegas in the course of one day without hopping a plane. Logic? We don't need your stinking Earth logic!
So what does Jaden do once he thinks he hears Criss being shot? Why, he goes right back upstairs to face an escaped convict. Smart! Criss is laying on the floor, but there doesn't seem to be any blood. Perhaps he's magically holding it all in. And there's Shawn at the door! Gasp!
"So, you've got yourself a pretty little boyfriend eh?" Shawn said. I can't say anything. "A little magician doing card tricks and sawing whores in half? A prissy little gothic boy to paint your nails?"
That line wouldn't be nearly as funny if Criss hadn't given Jaden a mani-pedi in chapter three. No, really.
I take out the carpet cutter that usually resides in my pocket, and Shawn pulls out his gun. If the police don't show up there's one way out of this situation, and it isn't the fire escape.
I actually assumed, the first time I read this, that Jaden's first action upon being cornered wouldn't be to cut Shawn, but to slit his own wrists. It just seems to gel more with his characterization as the world's whiniest emo boy. And remember, he's supposed to be 27.
Part seven graced the world a few hours after part six was posted. The world (read: me and my friends) rejoiced.
No. I would'nt be able to get out of the room through the window, Shawn would folow me.
...Down the side of a pyramid-shaped building.
But just as I got the carpet cutter ready, and Just as Shawn cocked his gun, the swat team bursts through the door along with the regular police.
The swat team? Was that really necessary? It seems kinda like using a stick of dynamite to kill a fly.
"Jaden Steinenger?" A woman officer asks. "Yes." I reply. "My name is Wedy Come with me, There's an ambulance waiting downstairs, Jeffree and I will help carry Criss down."
Her name is pronounced Weedy in my mind. And did the other cop really have to be named Jeffree, after we were assured in chapter one that Jaden here is so totally not related to Jeffree Star? Because that's all I'm envisioning right now, and it's hurting my head--and I don't even really know who the guy is, I've just seen pictures. Furthermore, why are there no paramedics accompanying the police? Are they all just chilling downstairs at the buffet or something?
Criss stirred while he was being carried by the officers. "Where's Jaden? Is he alright? Where's Jaden?" He beggs.
THRILL at the random tense changes!
"I was so worried that you'd end up hurt." He whispered. "I think I was about ten times more worried than you where." I reply.
The author seems convinced that where = past tense of are. This error has cropped up consistently across all chapters of the story, and none of the reviewers has bothered to inform her that she's doing it wrong.
He wasn't in the mood for any bad publicity, his wife had just left him, he had been caught, still alive hanging around America's disaster AKA Britney Spears, and now this.
Ordinarily I wouldn't argue with a pot-shot at Britney Spears, but this just comes out of ass-nowhere. At least the whole wife leaving thing was previously touched on.
Now it was going to get out that Criss liked guys too, and that his boyfriend's crazy ex had shown up and wanted to kill them both. I could'nt help but feel that the whole thing was my fault. But I also couldnt help but think, If I had'nt met Criss, Shawn probably would have found me and killed me.
And what a tragedy that would be.
A few weeks later, I was sitting on my couch, Ipod in my ears, flipping through a magazine about drums and other musical instruments,
1. I don't think the iPod is actually supposed to be inserted into your ear canals, sir.
2. I don't know what it is about the phrasing of 'drums and other musical instruments' that bothers me, but something does.
Criss calls Jaden up and asks him to meet him at a certain address and tells him to dress nice. Oh, and calls him Jadey. Jaden calls him Crissy. Yeah. To quote mynameishelen: "I look forward to the next chapter when Crissyface will probably put a bandaid on Jadeypops' scraped knee after kissing it better."
I had just pulled out tight black dress pants, a red button-down that matched my hair and a black tie.
There are no colors in this author's universe aside from black and red. While I approve of this color scheme, some variations would be nice. Jaden's bedroom is all black and red too. Perhaps black like his soul and red like the blood from his slit wrists.
I roll the sleeves of the shirt up to my elbows, because that's how I like it, and I'm off. I'm half way down the hall way when I realize that I'm not wearing any shoes.
GASP as Jaden nearly leaves his apartment without footwear!
It turns out that the address he was given is the nicest restaurant in town. How, I ask, does Jaden not know where the nicest restaurant in Las Vegas is located if he lives there and apparently has for a while? But I digress. There's a woman and two other men already in the booth, and...
The first thing out of the woman is "OH HE'S JUST SO CUTE!! " as she jumps out of the booth, knocking criss out of his seat and runs up to hug me.
Holy crap. This is not the first time people have had this reaction to Jaden. It makes me wonder why all these people apparently lack any ounce of self-control.
Why, why I ask, are all women like this to me?
I got nothin'.
Chapter eight opens with the wtf-inducing revelation that the woman who just jumped Jadeykin's ass out of nowhere is Criss' mother. If my mother did that to my girlfriend, I'd be very disturbed. But hey, at least she likes him.
"So is Jaden joining the Mindfeak crew?" Costa asks. "Sure" I reply.
Way to invite yourself, Jaden.
"Christopher, don't make him go to any of the stupid things you do!" His mother warned. "JD says you plan on burrying yourself alive this season. You'd better not drag him along unless he wants to come"
I like how she's not worried about her own son's safety, but is terribly concerned about this stranger who she met five minutes ago. Though I guess maybe she's gotten used to Criss doing crazy dangerous things.
Crissy gets to sleep over at my house tonight.
lyke omg you guys we can do each other's hair and talk about boys and give each other makeovers and have pillow fights yey! Wtf, they're grown men, did Criss have to ask permission?
I open the door to the little place and as soo as the door shuts, he grabs me by the waist and starts unbuttoning my shirt.
And now it's time to venture into this author's patented brand of wtf-inducing semi-smut. While it's not particularly urply, it presents a case for why fourteen year old girls should not write gay sex. Or any sex.
I don't answer, his lips make contact with my neck and I cant hold back a little moan."Jaden, I love you." He whispers. It's only been a couple of months, but I believe him.
You can always believe a guy if he says he loves you when he's trying to get in your pants!
He slides my shirt off of my shoulders and tells me to lay face down on the couch. I do as he says and i feel him straddle my back.
Buttsecks: You're doing it wrong. Or not, because it turns out Criss just wants to give Jaden a massage. Yeah, that's realistic.
Just when I feel like I could fall asleep any second, he speaks. "Would it be alright if I left a mark?"He sighs.
Jaden: Okay, but just make sure it's somewhere that my parents won't see it.
I thought he was going to hurt me for a second, but then i felt him start sucking on my neck and that was it for me!
...Did he seriously just orgasm from that? Is that humanly possible?
Criss and Jaden go to bed and have some cutesy-wootsy dialog, and then morning comes. Yay.
"Should we shower or something?" I suggest. "Yep." He beams, sliding off my pants and boxers."Fine then." I think as I take his boxers off and start touching him.
I don't know about you guys, but I came.
I turn on the water, and wait for it to get hot.
I think we're all waiting for it to get hot, but I, for one, am not getting my hopes up.
He picks me up and sits me on the counter.His toung slides over my neck then he kisses me. He lifts me up and sets me on my feet in the shower. He climbes in after me and runs his hands over my sides before getting lower.
She hit the floor! Next thing you know! Shorty got low low low low low low low...
I moan as his hand slides down the length and he starts playing with me. The sensation is in describable.
The first time I read that, I thought it said "the sensation is describable." Really, that would've been par for the course here.
I turn around and kiss him again, before I start playing with him.
That sounds more like they're sitting around playing with dolls or something than getting frisky in the shower. Look, it's called a penis. You don't have to be afraid to say it, author.
We keep playing and kissing untill we've both came a couple of times, and the water runs cold.
Well, that was scintillating.
He hands me a towel, which i wrap around myself in the manner a woman would. I'm not entirely sure what brought on that habbit.
Shot in the dark here, Jaden, but I think it may have something to do with the fact that you're more effeminate than myself and all my female friends, regardless of sexuality, combined.
"Arent we just the most adorable couple?" He asks.
Apparently, Criss is also more effeminate than myself and my friends combined.
So they're going to be taping some stuff for the show later, and Jaden's going to come along. Criss wants shots of Jaden in the show. Aw, how romantic.
"If you insist. There's going to be a rise in Tokio hotel fangirls watching your show if you do that. I dont understand it. I dont look as girly as he does!" I whine.
So just in case you've forgotten, Jaden looks omg just like Bill from Tokio Hotel! Zomg! If you need to get a visual aid here, go Google the band, I'll wait. For the record, this fic was discovered while looking for Criss Angel pictures because he's my friend's RP character's PB. This Bill guy is also a PB for another character, played by my girlfriend. This breaks my brain on a few additional levels. *shudder*
We get dressed and i put on a little make up and head back to his place.. We lay down on the couch, me on top, head comfortably on his chest.
Aw. Jadeykins is listening to Crissypoo's heartbeat. Have you ever seen anything more touching, I ask you?
Suddenly, Criss' brother JD arrives and starts filming them and demands that they do something cute. Oh noes! Somebody's filming them after they've gotten all prepared to be filmed!
"So Crissy tell the camera how far you've gotten." "Shut the fuck up! Who let you in?" "DUmbass you told me to shut up and then you ask me a question?"
Nothing gets me going more than a bunch of grown men acting like fifteen year old girls.
"Lets see something cute." "NO" I get up, and criss folows, grabbing the camera from JD and shutting it off.
And that, my friends, is the end of chapter 8 of this magnum opus. I ask you all, has there ever been a more riveting tale of love, loss, and human nature? I'm so overwhelmed.