blahhhhhhhhh
my life has completely changed over from being awake in the day to being awake at night. even if i sleep all night to try and reverse myself, i'll just keep sleeping straight through to the next night. i can't win. which is why i'm up at 4am writing in my livejournal.
life is weird, ya know? like im still not registered for school and it starts on monday. that is stressing me out. i feel like i'm never going to graduate, which makes me nervous and sad.
i was supposed to see cara this week but now it looks like that's not happening, again. this also makes me sad because i haven't seen her since... i dont know when. its been a long time. and she really is my closest friend. i feel like lately my friendships have gotten more and more strained/non-existant. sonja never follows through on the hangouts anymore. jess... i feel like she's gotten so selfish and i just dont want to deal with it. the fab five, i love you, but we hardly hang out when we're all home together. it's just getting to be that time of the year again where i realize that i once again have no friends within an hour's radius. i really need to get my license.
john is great. far away, but great. im very excited for the day when we just live together and there's no more of this seeing-each-other-for-4-out-of-14-days-if-we're-lucky crap. i mean i love it because i love spending time with him and seeing him and being together. but distance blows. it really does.
everyone i want to see is an hour (or 4) away from me and it makes me so sad. i dont even have school to look forward to because my parents dont feel like paying for me to go anymore.
and my room has been in a constant state of distress. seriously. im trying to clean it and make it my own again but, as you can imagine with a reversed sleep schedule, that is difficult. i get yelled at for making noise up here past like 11. and im asleep when everyone else is awake.
finally, it is freezing in my room. the heat doesnt work up here. i thought for awhile that i was allowing my room to stay extremely cluttered and gross to maybe insulate the room, but i've learned that that doesnt work.
im going to make myself some tea and straighten up as quietly as i can. i hope my life gets its act together soon.
life is weird, ya know? like im still not registered for school and it starts on monday. that is stressing me out. i feel like i'm never going to graduate, which makes me nervous and sad.
i was supposed to see cara this week but now it looks like that's not happening, again. this also makes me sad because i haven't seen her since... i dont know when. its been a long time. and she really is my closest friend. i feel like lately my friendships have gotten more and more strained/non-existant. sonja never follows through on the hangouts anymore. jess... i feel like she's gotten so selfish and i just dont want to deal with it. the fab five, i love you, but we hardly hang out when we're all home together. it's just getting to be that time of the year again where i realize that i once again have no friends within an hour's radius. i really need to get my license.
john is great. far away, but great. im very excited for the day when we just live together and there's no more of this seeing-each-other-for-4-out-of-14-days-if-we're-lucky crap. i mean i love it because i love spending time with him and seeing him and being together. but distance blows. it really does.
everyone i want to see is an hour (or 4) away from me and it makes me so sad. i dont even have school to look forward to because my parents dont feel like paying for me to go anymore.
and my room has been in a constant state of distress. seriously. im trying to clean it and make it my own again but, as you can imagine with a reversed sleep schedule, that is difficult. i get yelled at for making noise up here past like 11. and im asleep when everyone else is awake.
finally, it is freezing in my room. the heat doesnt work up here. i thought for awhile that i was allowing my room to stay extremely cluttered and gross to maybe insulate the room, but i've learned that that doesnt work.
im going to make myself some tea and straighten up as quietly as i can. i hope my life gets its act together soon.