It's not my job to watch your ass. Well... most of the time anyway...
On my way to class, I had a rather large moral delimma to work against. Do I put a shoulder in jaw of the person who has absolutely no idea where they are walking, or do I calmly let them pass and just disregard them as another idiot blithering though life?
Now, in my own defense, for the past 15 years, hockey has taught me that if I see anyone not looking in the direction they are heading, lay 'em out. Fuck, any sport that doesn't involve being a pansy teaches you to lay someone out if they're not paying attention. It's fucking survival of the fittest. If you don't pay attention to your surroundings, you're going to get hurt. Every time I see these people, I just have the urge to scream, "Keep your head up!!" then put them on the ground. I don't mean to seem any more of an asshole than I already am, but it's just force of habit. That, and the fact that I haven't played in so long, the start of the NHL season really has me itching to get out there.
Anyway, today, while on my way to class, I come upon this group of girls that are heading in the other direction. Preface #1) I'm taller than average, therefore walk faster than average. Preface #2) I'm in a rather large hurry to get to class, so as not to be too late.
They are walking about 4-wide, and taking up damn near the whole sidewalk, but I have enough room to get by. It isn't until a friend of theirs comes from behind yelling their name that the predicament presents itself. The girl closest to me proceeds to turn 90 degrees so that her bag is sitting perfectly in front of me. She turns her head so that she can see her friend and make conversation. She's now about 2-3 feet from me AND SHE KEEPS WALKING FORWARD. It wasn't rage or anger or anything like along those lines that rose up in me. It was the sheer need and want for violent contact. It's nothing mean-spirited. Hell, other hockey/football/rugby players know exactly what I'm talking about. It's just something that gets ingrained in us and when we stop getting it, we really, really, really want it back, no matter the setting. I digress. The options before me are now a) take two steps aside to the grass and walk pass the blithe idiot in front of me, b) stop and wait for the dumb bitch to figure out what she's doing, but continue to keep a certain amount of gentleman about me and let her pass unscathed, or c) light her up like christmas and plead not guilty. What did I choose?
Well, kind of a combination of a and c. I only took one step to the side, walked right into her bookbag, almost surely spinning her another 90 degrees, and I could only hear the fait sounds of "rude fucking asshole." It's not like I dropped my shoulder and put some emphasis on it. I wasn't trying to make her look like an idiot. I just stayed my course and she put herself in it. If we were driving cars and we collided, she's paying all of my damages. She never saw me coming, didn't keep her eyes on the road, so why should walking be any different, right?!
Just a cautionary lesson kids. Keep your head up. You never know when you're going to be in the way of some jonezing contact-sport asshole. Whether it be the mall, campus, or whatever other public forum you can think of, look where you're going. Even if someone isn't asshole enough to run you over, you probably pissed a whole lot of other people off because they were nice enough to get out of your way. So, if you think about it, who's really the asshole here?
Now, in my own defense, for the past 15 years, hockey has taught me that if I see anyone not looking in the direction they are heading, lay 'em out. Fuck, any sport that doesn't involve being a pansy teaches you to lay someone out if they're not paying attention. It's fucking survival of the fittest. If you don't pay attention to your surroundings, you're going to get hurt. Every time I see these people, I just have the urge to scream, "Keep your head up!!" then put them on the ground. I don't mean to seem any more of an asshole than I already am, but it's just force of habit. That, and the fact that I haven't played in so long, the start of the NHL season really has me itching to get out there.
Anyway, today, while on my way to class, I come upon this group of girls that are heading in the other direction. Preface #1) I'm taller than average, therefore walk faster than average. Preface #2) I'm in a rather large hurry to get to class, so as not to be too late.
They are walking about 4-wide, and taking up damn near the whole sidewalk, but I have enough room to get by. It isn't until a friend of theirs comes from behind yelling their name that the predicament presents itself. The girl closest to me proceeds to turn 90 degrees so that her bag is sitting perfectly in front of me. She turns her head so that she can see her friend and make conversation. She's now about 2-3 feet from me AND SHE KEEPS WALKING FORWARD. It wasn't rage or anger or anything like along those lines that rose up in me. It was the sheer need and want for violent contact. It's nothing mean-spirited. Hell, other hockey/football/rugby players know exactly what I'm talking about. It's just something that gets ingrained in us and when we stop getting it, we really, really, really want it back, no matter the setting. I digress. The options before me are now a) take two steps aside to the grass and walk pass the blithe idiot in front of me, b) stop and wait for the dumb bitch to figure out what she's doing, but continue to keep a certain amount of gentleman about me and let her pass unscathed, or c) light her up like christmas and plead not guilty. What did I choose?
Well, kind of a combination of a and c. I only took one step to the side, walked right into her bookbag, almost surely spinning her another 90 degrees, and I could only hear the fait sounds of "rude fucking asshole." It's not like I dropped my shoulder and put some emphasis on it. I wasn't trying to make her look like an idiot. I just stayed my course and she put herself in it. If we were driving cars and we collided, she's paying all of my damages. She never saw me coming, didn't keep her eyes on the road, so why should walking be any different, right?!
Just a cautionary lesson kids. Keep your head up. You never know when you're going to be in the way of some jonezing contact-sport asshole. Whether it be the mall, campus, or whatever other public forum you can think of, look where you're going. Even if someone isn't asshole enough to run you over, you probably pissed a whole lot of other people off because they were nice enough to get out of your way. So, if you think about it, who's really the asshole here?