now ive got all the best ingredients. and one clean spoon with which to stir them.

[spoonlift]

i am in the process of knitting a sweater. and seeing as how i dont know how to knit, this will probably take a very long time. not too long ago i realised that the perfect gift would have to be... something that the intended receiver would like to fit into. [something to get wrapped up in..?] this is my first attempt at knitting a sweater. but don't you worry, i know what i am doing. it is a lengthy process, but little by little i am gathering the necessary measurements. and even a few preferences [color? pockets?]. i must say, the process is very much like solving a puzzle. every now and then i find a little puzzle piece. and i pick it up. generally i carry it around with me for a couple of days before i decide on where i should try to place it. and when i finally do place it, it always fits perfectly. and so then i expend a couple more days staring at it. and when the novelty wears off, the cycle begins again. i know now that i am not simply walking around, finding these puzzle pieces by complete accident. no, no. now i know for shure that i am always always searching for them. and because i am always searching, i am always finding. but in all my searching, when will i ever find the time to do the knitting?! heaven knows i'm miserable now. and heaven knows i've had the yarn stashed away for at least a year. this is no ordinary yarn, mind you. and it would be a shame if it were never put to use. also, i often get angry when too many other things occupy me. they get in the way of my knitting. don't you see this is all i really want to do?! oh, it must seem quite sad. but i actually find the opposite to be much worse. you see, when one buys someone a gift, there exists most often a receipt. but when one spends years knitting a sweater as a gift, there is no receipt. there is no way to replace the time and care that went into making it. and as anyone knitting someone a sweater will tell you, there is the ever present concern that perhaps this person already has a sweater which he is very much attached to [grrr.. especially if it was a store-bought]. what then will become of the sweater you labored over for an uncalculated period of time? for this, there is only one solution.

KNIT THE TASTIEST SWEATER THAT EVER EXISTED!!!

and i can guarantee you, my dear, that my sweater will be the warmest youve ever worn.