RL update.
I feel so...uninspired and numb lately, it's unsettling.
Politics are at least mildly interesting, but honestly, if I didn't have my cat purring in my lap every so often and this Mozart thing to work on, I honestly wouldn't have a reason to get out of bed other than life necessities.
I saw a state patrol car turning around behind me and I freaked the fuck out because I was going five miles over and I thought I was going to get pulled over. Turns out he/she was just being a douche. He wound up following me all the way to the entrance of my neighborhood, for at least ten minutes, and that terror I felt at the possibility of getting a ticket for going five miles over is pretty much the most I've felt in the last couple of days.
Now I've settled down from that and I want a nap. I've been getting up at 8 or 9 lately. I actually went back to the gym last night for about forty-five minutes for the first time in a month, but that still didn't feel good. I need to clean because my living room is atrocious (I haven't vacuumed in ages and I have a pile of diet coke cans on my coffee table) but every time I start to think about doing it, there's this tightness in my chest, and it's just overwhelming.
I looked at the help-wanted section in the paper and the only employment available I qualified for was at Dunkin' Donuts. I applied, but, do I honestly think anything will come of it? No. I have a student today, but he wants to learn stupid shit like Lean on Me and Heart and Soul, which I told him he couldn't do because it's a duet, and he's just not putting any practice time in and it's painful getting through the lessons.
I remember being in love with my life five years ago when I was starting music school.
I want that feeling back.
In other news, the washing machine broke. It made a funny noise and started to smell like burning rubber during the spin cycle. The worst part is that I have to deal with my parents to use their machine if I want clean clothes. *Sigh*
Politics are at least mildly interesting, but honestly, if I didn't have my cat purring in my lap every so often and this Mozart thing to work on, I honestly wouldn't have a reason to get out of bed other than life necessities.
I saw a state patrol car turning around behind me and I freaked the fuck out because I was going five miles over and I thought I was going to get pulled over. Turns out he/she was just being a douche. He wound up following me all the way to the entrance of my neighborhood, for at least ten minutes, and that terror I felt at the possibility of getting a ticket for going five miles over is pretty much the most I've felt in the last couple of days.
Now I've settled down from that and I want a nap. I've been getting up at 8 or 9 lately. I actually went back to the gym last night for about forty-five minutes for the first time in a month, but that still didn't feel good. I need to clean because my living room is atrocious (I haven't vacuumed in ages and I have a pile of diet coke cans on my coffee table) but every time I start to think about doing it, there's this tightness in my chest, and it's just overwhelming.
I looked at the help-wanted section in the paper and the only employment available I qualified for was at Dunkin' Donuts. I applied, but, do I honestly think anything will come of it? No. I have a student today, but he wants to learn stupid shit like Lean on Me and Heart and Soul, which I told him he couldn't do because it's a duet, and he's just not putting any practice time in and it's painful getting through the lessons.
I remember being in love with my life five years ago when I was starting music school.
I want that feeling back.
In other news, the washing machine broke. It made a funny noise and started to smell like burning rubber during the spin cycle. The worst part is that I have to deal with my parents to use their machine if I want clean clothes. *Sigh*