Sipping the backwash of gods
What is stressing me out right now? I'm just sitting here with no tangible responsibilities, feeling stressed, and I'd like to know why. I thought having a planner would help, and it does. Nonetheless, it's time for the stress-buster that has yet to fail me: a list. Lists reduce boiling knots of so-called problems into the manageable human trivialities they truly are.
Stress Inducers.
- My car/Car insurance. My dad, who I met once, has a car for me. He wants me to have it, but I don't have money for insurance. Thus, a ball of stress regarding how to pay for car insurance; as well as, how does one go about getting car insurance, anyway? I've never done it, so I don't even know where to start. Where is Mr. Insurance.
-Dental. I hear horror stories about what can happen if you don't get your wisdom teeth out. I have some kind of health insurance under my parents, but they don't know whether it covers dental. My mom says I should call a dentist's office and ask them. That sounds weird to me. Is that weird? I hate getting hung up on. In any case, if I have coverage it probably doesn't include wisdom teeth removal. Thus, the stress of how to pay for that so that I don't have complications resulting in drastically crooked teeth, and/or blindness, and/or death.
- New bank account. I need to transfer my account to Wells Fargo since my current local bank is... local. And I'll be moving. Probably a very simple process but I haven't done it yet, thereby adding it to the list.
- Employment. Finding a new job. Feeling like a loser for not having one.
- Housing. Need to find a place to live in Arcata. Can't take another summer in Davis. Quashing worries of running out of money once there.
And that's it really. Definitely seems like nothing much, written down. Conquerable. All of it comes down to money. Fucking money. How I loathe it and its inescapable grip on modern life. Probably a step towards peace is getting over that -- hating this adult world of papers (files and forms) and other papers (money). There isn't anything I can do about it, short of joining an Amish community or moving to an "undeveloped" country, which only trades in familiar problems for unfamiliar ones. So I'd better learn to accept, or at least peacefully tolerate, these convoluted symbolisms and societal intricacies designed by those in power, wherein power = money (papers). I'm not ruling out the Amish thing though.
Stress Inducers.
- My car/Car insurance. My dad, who I met once, has a car for me. He wants me to have it, but I don't have money for insurance. Thus, a ball of stress regarding how to pay for car insurance; as well as, how does one go about getting car insurance, anyway? I've never done it, so I don't even know where to start. Where is Mr. Insurance.
-Dental. I hear horror stories about what can happen if you don't get your wisdom teeth out. I have some kind of health insurance under my parents, but they don't know whether it covers dental. My mom says I should call a dentist's office and ask them. That sounds weird to me. Is that weird? I hate getting hung up on. In any case, if I have coverage it probably doesn't include wisdom teeth removal. Thus, the stress of how to pay for that so that I don't have complications resulting in drastically crooked teeth, and/or blindness, and/or death.
- New bank account. I need to transfer my account to Wells Fargo since my current local bank is... local. And I'll be moving. Probably a very simple process but I haven't done it yet, thereby adding it to the list.
- Employment. Finding a new job. Feeling like a loser for not having one.
- Housing. Need to find a place to live in Arcata. Can't take another summer in Davis. Quashing worries of running out of money once there.
And that's it really. Definitely seems like nothing much, written down. Conquerable. All of it comes down to money. Fucking money. How I loathe it and its inescapable grip on modern life. Probably a step towards peace is getting over that -- hating this adult world of papers (files and forms) and other papers (money). There isn't anything I can do about it, short of joining an Amish community or moving to an "undeveloped" country, which only trades in familiar problems for unfamiliar ones. So I'd better learn to accept, or at least peacefully tolerate, these convoluted symbolisms and societal intricacies designed by those in power, wherein power = money (papers). I'm not ruling out the Amish thing though.