Sep 01, 2015 20:56
To Spokensilent,
It's been quite some time...I don't even know how to do this anymore, but lets try.
How long has it been, almost 3 years since I dropped a line. Wow, looking back at some of these posts, clearly you were in somewhat an emotional state. It's good to know you've done a lot better since. Already in a few sentences I see the difference. The tone, the perspective..it's different.
Have you finally seen the light in that tunnel? Are you finally done with chasing dreams that grow distant? Where are you at now?... I'll tell you. I've made peace and found comfort in it. Through perseverance, I've managed to keep something special without feeling the hurt...the pain, the sadness.
Things has changed my friend, since last we spoke, a lot has changed. A lot of pain, sadness, fear and regret over the years...all that have lead to this.
I've lost a cousin, my last grandparent, and as of May 2014...My Father. There have been many things that have happened. Things that have opened my eyes. That let me see more than what I was fixated on. Priorities have changed, values have changed, I...have changed.
I'm just going to put it all out there. I work with the girl I loved once and to be honest I'm not sure how I feel. I think we are good. When we work together, I never think of what was...I think of what I am doing now. Work first, Friendship second, emotions in that regard buried deep down, so deep that I am hardly aware if they are there..or if they exist for that matter. Whether they do, or do not is of no concern for me. I'm okay with whatever may exist being forgotten for the greater good.
Ahh shit buddy....Looks like I'm fresh out of time, till the next we meet...probably tomorrow so I can finish this update.
Cheers,