This post is for ANY AND ALL SPN & OTHER CHARACTER PROMPTS. Characters from other fandoms are allowed as long as the main pairing includes one Supernatural character. Reminder: all prompts with people under the age of 18 should be posted to the underage post.
FINISHED 'Don't think too hard' Sam/Dean, hell issues, kissing projected 5/5
anonymous
November 8 2012, 00:49:21 UTC
When he presses back, he can't quite believe that he's doing this. This is Sam, his brother, and he's pressing against him, taking his warmth, giving him this. Then the logical bit of him raises his head, and he can't quite believe that it's that part that's telling him to do this. But it is, and Jesus he has to do this. Who the fuck else will after all? Who'll kiss Sam, and stop when he can't take it, or just hold him enough that he can stop shaking? It's always been him, this is his job, he'll do anything for Sam, he's always known that, everyone knows it. John knew it, trained him oh so well, created him it feels sometimes for this purpose, every evil son of a bitch they hunt knows it, they always go for Sammy because they know where it hurts, know how to press his buttons so hard. The only person who doesn't know it properly is Sam. He knows Dean loves him, knows what Dean has done for him, but Dean doubts that he gets just how deep that goes. Four nights before, he'd pinned Sam to a bed and got closer to him than anyone ever had, shielded him from having to see, pushed through his barriers, and it had driven home to him that sometimes loving Sammy and doing what's best for him, mean ignoring what he wants.
In this case it means listening to it. He learns fast when it's the things he loves. Learns the rhythm of Sam's breathing, the swift sudden pacing of his panic, the sound he makes when it gets too much, learns them and stores them somewhere so deep he'll never lose them, they'll be part of his blood and his bone and heart as long as he lives. Knows Sam's doing the same, because this thing has never been one way, no matter how it might have looked from the outside. He pretends not to notice that Sam's face is wet, and not just from Sam's tears, just thumbs them away with hands as firm and gentle as he can make them, because Sam has to know it's him, and he can’t tell if it’s him or the him of twenty years ago who thinks fiercely, when the fuck has he ever let Sam cry and not tried to fix it?
Sam pushes back against him, hands fumbling in Dean's jacket, pulling him closer and pushing him away like he can't decide what he wants, or what he thinks he should want. Dean makes that decision for him, he needs Sam patched, needs him up and running and living no matter how superficially. He hasn't had Sam whole in too long doesn't expect ever to again, it's been so tough, and if he could fix it he would, but he can't, all he can do is hold the pieces together with strength of will like he does with himself each day, and hope that he's helping that he's doing something to make this better.
The kiss is chaste, terribly so, like the imprint a sinner leaves on the feet of the cross, can't ever not be so Dean knows and is glad. Had been afraid some tiny freakish bit of him, the bit that had always been terrified he was a monster, would get off on this, because hell, hell had done a lot of things to him, and he still finds the remnants, still sometimes thinks thoughts that aren't his, aren't organic or natural, more monstrous than human.
But it's just Sam, Sam there and needing him and Dean will never say no to that. Can't. He eases back, time to let Sammy take the reins, and Sam tenses against him like this sudden pause is a responsibility he has to take up, then presses closer breathes in Dean's air, a shared exhalation, one breath for them both, and this is more intimate Dean thinks than anything he has ever done before. Wonders if Sam feels that as well. This is what counts, this between them, not what was done to them, not what was inflicted, that had to be borne, that they never had a choice with. This is theirs and Sam can hit him if he wants, can push him down and whale at him, and that's the point of it. They can stop. Sam's lips are warm, are dry and shy against his, and he tastes only, faintly of salt, the salt of his tequila, and perhaps tears.
Re: FINISHED 'Don't think too hard' Sam/Dean, hell issues, kissing projected 5/5
anonymous
November 8 2012, 00:50:01 UTC
The damage isn't fixed, Dean knows that. It'll take more than a kiss, take more than a night to make a dent. But Sam knows, he thinks, knows that Dean will do this for him, and he knows that Sam will also, and it's a start. He imagines tomorrow, imagines holding Sam's wrist as they drive, fingers indenting in exactly where the devil grips you tight, and then releasing and letting go. Closes his eyes, and lets himself fall.
Re: Tagged!
anonymous
November 8 2012, 01:08:02 UTC
Cheers. Sorry I was literally coming back to ask if it's possible to change the title. I was hoping to rename to 'Stoop and Build (With Worn-out Tools)'
Re: FINISHED 'Don't think too hard' Sam/Dean, hell issues, kissing projected 5/5
anonymous
November 8 2012, 01:42:05 UTC
THIS. <3 I love this dynamic so, so much, almost more than I do regular Wincest (blasphemy!). And so exquisitely written, too; your Dean POV and characterisation was perfect.
Re: FINISHED 'Don't think too hard' Sam/Dean, hell issues, kissing projected 5/5
anonymous
November 8 2012, 02:06:35 UTC
ayrt
I'm really glad you enjoyed it! I love the dynamic as well, so had to snap this prompt up. Thank you so much for the kind words, it's fantastic to hear.
Re: FINISHED 'Don't think too hard' Sam/Dean, hell issues, kissing projected 5/5
anonymous
November 9 2012, 18:29:44 UTC
ayrt
No problem about the car - I think I was thinking of that as a setting to influence a potential art fill rather than motel bed? This really is perfect and brilliant and UTTERLY satisfying, I think you've probably been seeing me express joy about it elsewhere today <3.
Re: FINISHED 'Don't think too hard' Sam/Dean, hell issues, kissing projected 5/5
anonymous
November 9 2012, 19:13:43 UTC
ayrt
My id is just that obvious :( I did see it! I was filled with a proud sense of warmth to be honest, and then the dilemma over how to reply. If I ignored it, it'd look like I was dissing your taste, but it is frankly beyond me to rec my own work.
Re: FINISHED 'Don't think too hard' Sam/Dean, hell issues, kissing projected 5/5
anonymous
November 9 2012, 19:23:55 UTC
ayrt
Ahah, I just meant because I know you're over there; I am TERRIBLE at knowing who I'm talking to :). Well, then, I'm extra pleased to have been talking to you positively about something that made me so happy, and to know we share some iddy tendencies. At some point I'll have to friend your sock, though maybe not *today* as it'd be a major anonfail which seems counter to the game ;). You've filled more than one prompt of mine, actually; the J2 hatesex one was me, too, and that's the OTHER reason to friend you so I can see any updates!
Re: FINISHED 'Don't think too hard' Sam/Dean, hell issues, kissing projected 5/5
anonymous
November 9 2012, 19:33:00 UTC
*clutches hair* if only I hadn't jumped to conclusions no-one would ever have known!
Yes do, do when you feel comfortable with it. You can tell I haven't slotted right back into SPN fandom what with my gaily de-anoning habits!
Aw man that was your prompt as well? I am doubly as pleased :). For the sake of information, the second chapter is up, and I've almost finished writing the third.
In this case it means listening to it. He learns fast when it's the things he loves. Learns the rhythm of Sam's breathing, the swift sudden pacing of his panic, the sound he makes when it gets too much, learns them and stores them somewhere so deep he'll never lose them, they'll be part of his blood and his bone and heart as long as he lives. Knows Sam's doing the same, because this thing has never been one way, no matter how it might have looked from the outside. He pretends not to notice that Sam's face is wet, and not just from Sam's tears, just thumbs them away with hands as firm and gentle as he can make them, because Sam has to know it's him, and he can’t tell if it’s him or the him of twenty years ago who thinks fiercely, when the fuck has he ever let Sam cry and not tried to fix it?
Sam pushes back against him, hands fumbling in Dean's jacket, pulling him closer and pushing him away like he can't decide what he wants, or what he thinks he should want. Dean makes that decision for him, he needs Sam patched, needs him up and running and living no matter how superficially. He hasn't had Sam whole in too long doesn't expect ever to again, it's been so tough, and if he could fix it he would, but he can't, all he can do is hold the pieces together with strength of will like he does with himself each day, and hope that he's helping that he's doing something to make this better.
The kiss is chaste, terribly so, like the imprint a sinner leaves on the feet of the cross, can't ever not be so Dean knows and is glad. Had been afraid some tiny freakish bit of him, the bit that had always been terrified he was a monster, would get off on this, because hell, hell had done a lot of things to him, and he still finds the remnants, still sometimes thinks thoughts that aren't his, aren't organic or natural, more monstrous than human.
But it's just Sam, Sam there and needing him and Dean will never say no to that. Can't. He eases back, time to let Sammy take the reins, and Sam tenses against him like this sudden pause is a responsibility he has to take up, then presses closer breathes in Dean's air, a shared exhalation, one breath for them both, and this is more intimate Dean thinks than anything he has ever done before. Wonders if Sam feels that as well. This is what counts, this between them, not what was done to them, not what was inflicted, that had to be borne, that they never had a choice with. This is theirs and Sam can hit him if he wants, can push him down and whale at him, and that's the point of it. They can stop. Sam's lips are warm, are dry and shy against his, and he tastes only, faintly of salt, the salt of his tequila, and perhaps tears.
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Wordcount: 3920
Kink: platonic, kissing, caretaking, hurt/comfort, Sam'n'Dean
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If that's not possible, it's fine though :)
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I'm really glad you enjoyed it! I love the dynamic as well, so had to snap this prompt up. Thank you so much for the kind words, it's fantastic to hear.
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Really, this was wonderful <3
I loved the intensity of Dean's caring here, and that in this story, it was completely platonic. So gorgeous, thank you very much ♥
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Cheers! I am really glad that it hit what you wanted :) am just sorry I couldn't work them into the car to do it.
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No problem about the car - I think I was thinking of that as a setting to influence a potential art fill rather than motel bed? This really is perfect and brilliant and UTTERLY satisfying, I think you've probably been seeing me express joy about it elsewhere today <3.
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My id is just that obvious :( I did see it! I was filled with a proud sense of warmth to be honest, and then the dilemma over how to reply. If I ignored it, it'd look like I was dissing your taste, but it is frankly beyond me to rec my own work.
/thinks way too much about small things
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Ahah, I just meant because I know you're over there; I am TERRIBLE at knowing who I'm talking to :). Well, then, I'm extra pleased to have been talking to you positively about something that made me so happy, and to know we share some iddy tendencies. At some point I'll have to friend your sock, though maybe not *today* as it'd be a major anonfail which seems counter to the game ;). You've filled more than one prompt of mine, actually; the J2 hatesex one was me, too, and that's the OTHER reason to friend you so I can see any updates!
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Yes do, do when you feel comfortable with it. You can tell I haven't slotted right back into SPN fandom what with my gaily de-anoning habits!
Aw man that was your prompt as well? I am doubly as pleased :). For the sake of information, the second chapter is up, and I've almost finished writing the third.
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