KICKIN' ASS AND TAKIN' NAMES.
SO I'VE BEEN REAL LAX IN MY TRAININ' OF JESS, BUT AFTER YESTERDAYS LITTLE SPARRIN' SESSION WITH JOHN (THANKS JOHN *WINK*) I DECIDED THAT WE COULD ALL USE SOME OF THAT. TESSA SEEMED TO BE GETTIN' PRETTY DAMN FRUSTRATED AND SHE DOES NEED TO LEARN HOW TO DEFEND HERSELF SO I THOUGHT...
I FIGURED THE GIRLS WERE ALREADY HALFWAY TO BEIN' NINJAS SO I DECIDED TO TAKE THEM TO MY OLD SENSEI, ONLY TO FIND THAT HE'S SOLD OUT AND BECOME ONE OF THOSE CLICHE STEROTYPE NINJAS WITH A YOU TUBE ACCOUNT AND EVERYTHING.
STILL I THOUGHT, MAYBE HE HADN'T CHANGED THAT MUCH SO I LET HIM SHOW US ONE OF HIS VIDEOS:
IT'S JUST....SAD REALLY.
THEN HE HAD THE GALL TO TRY HITTIN' ON THE GIRLS IN THE STYLE OF A "NINJA". THIS IS HIS IDEA OF NINJA LOVE:
IT WAS A KINDNESS TO PUT HIM OUT OF HIS MISERY REALLY:
I DECIDED TO TRAIN THE GIRLS MYSELF. THEY'RE REAL QUICK LEARNERS AND IT WASN'T LONG BEFORE THEY NEEDED ACTUAL REAL WORLD EXPERIENCE. SO WE WENT OFF TO FIND SOME ASSHOLES AND RUIN THIER DAYS.
OF COURSE WE HAD TO LOOK FIERCE IF WE WERE ACTUALLY GOIN' TO PUT THIS INTO PRACTICE SO WE SPENT A BIT OF TIME DOIN' COSTUMES:
WE MIGHT NOT HAVE WINGS BUT WE'RE FIERCE BITCHES AND YOU FUCKIN' KNOW IT.
SO AFTER ALL THAT EFFORT, WANNA KNOW SOMETHIN'? ALL THE ASSHOLES TOOK TODAY OFF.
*THROWS UP HER HANDS*
I KNOW. IT'S JUST RUDE.
AT THIS POINT THE GIRLS AND I ARE MORE THAN A LITTLE NARKED OFF AND SUFFERING FROM PRETTY SEVERE CASES OF DDD OR DEATH AND DESTRUCTION DEFICIENCY.
SO WE WERE PROBABLY A LITTLE DRUNK ON ADRENALIN WHEN WE STUMBLED OVER THE TREEHOUSE PARKIN' LOT. WE SAW WARS CAR SITTING THERE ALL FORLORN AND LONELY LOOKIN' AND WELL, WHAT CAN YOU EXPECT?
YOU KNOW WAR HONEY, YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T LEAVE SOMETHIN' THAT PRETTY LAYIN' AROUND WHERE PEOPLE WITH ADRENALIN HIGHS, LARGE QUANTITIES OF EXPLOSIVES AND ACCESS TO FRAT BOYS (THANKS JESS) THAT'LL DO ANYTHIN' FOR A BILL CAN FIND IT.
BUT I KNEW YOU'D ONLY WHINE LIKE A LITTLE BITCH, SO I GOT TESSA TO FIX IT UP AGAIN:
NO HARM, NO FOUL.
BUT SINCE WE DIDN'T ACTUALLY GET TO TRASH ANYTHING WE GOT A LITTLE CARRIED AWAY WITH THE LEFT OVERS:
ON THE PLUS SIDE, MY GIRLS LEARNED HOW TO KICK THE SHIT OUT OF ASSHOLES THAT REALLY DESERVE IT (WHEN THEY AREN'T ALL BEIN' PUSSIES AND HIDIN' FROM US.) AND TESSA GOT A GOOD GROUNDING IN THE FUNDAMENTALS OF BLOWIN' THE SHIT OUT OF STUFF.
GOTTA SAY...GOOD DAY.
I FIGURED THE GIRLS WERE ALREADY HALFWAY TO BEIN' NINJAS SO I DECIDED TO TAKE THEM TO MY OLD SENSEI, ONLY TO FIND THAT HE'S SOLD OUT AND BECOME ONE OF THOSE CLICHE STEROTYPE NINJAS WITH A YOU TUBE ACCOUNT AND EVERYTHING.
STILL I THOUGHT, MAYBE HE HADN'T CHANGED THAT MUCH SO I LET HIM SHOW US ONE OF HIS VIDEOS:
Click to viewIT'S JUST....SAD REALLY.
THEN HE HAD THE GALL TO TRY HITTIN' ON THE GIRLS IN THE STYLE OF A "NINJA". THIS IS HIS IDEA OF NINJA LOVE:
IT WAS A KINDNESS TO PUT HIM OUT OF HIS MISERY REALLY:
I DECIDED TO TRAIN THE GIRLS MYSELF. THEY'RE REAL QUICK LEARNERS AND IT WASN'T LONG BEFORE THEY NEEDED ACTUAL REAL WORLD EXPERIENCE. SO WE WENT OFF TO FIND SOME ASSHOLES AND RUIN THIER DAYS.
OF COURSE WE HAD TO LOOK FIERCE IF WE WERE ACTUALLY GOIN' TO PUT THIS INTO PRACTICE SO WE SPENT A BIT OF TIME DOIN' COSTUMES:
WE MIGHT NOT HAVE WINGS BUT WE'RE FIERCE BITCHES AND YOU FUCKIN' KNOW IT.
SO AFTER ALL THAT EFFORT, WANNA KNOW SOMETHIN'? ALL THE ASSHOLES TOOK TODAY OFF.
*THROWS UP HER HANDS*
I KNOW. IT'S JUST RUDE.
AT THIS POINT THE GIRLS AND I ARE MORE THAN A LITTLE NARKED OFF AND SUFFERING FROM PRETTY SEVERE CASES OF DDD OR DEATH AND DESTRUCTION DEFICIENCY.
SO WE WERE PROBABLY A LITTLE DRUNK ON ADRENALIN WHEN WE STUMBLED OVER THE TREEHOUSE PARKIN' LOT. WE SAW WARS CAR SITTING THERE ALL FORLORN AND LONELY LOOKIN' AND WELL, WHAT CAN YOU EXPECT?
YOU KNOW WAR HONEY, YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T LEAVE SOMETHIN' THAT PRETTY LAYIN' AROUND WHERE PEOPLE WITH ADRENALIN HIGHS, LARGE QUANTITIES OF EXPLOSIVES AND ACCESS TO FRAT BOYS (THANKS JESS) THAT'LL DO ANYTHIN' FOR A BILL CAN FIND IT.
BUT I KNEW YOU'D ONLY WHINE LIKE A LITTLE BITCH, SO I GOT TESSA TO FIX IT UP AGAIN:
NO HARM, NO FOUL.
BUT SINCE WE DIDN'T ACTUALLY GET TO TRASH ANYTHING WE GOT A LITTLE CARRIED AWAY WITH THE LEFT OVERS:
ON THE PLUS SIDE, MY GIRLS LEARNED HOW TO KICK THE SHIT OUT OF ASSHOLES THAT REALLY DESERVE IT (WHEN THEY AREN'T ALL BEIN' PUSSIES AND HIDIN' FROM US.) AND TESSA GOT A GOOD GROUNDING IN THE FUNDAMENTALS OF BLOWIN' THE SHIT OUT OF STUFF.
GOTTA SAY...GOOD DAY.