Fic for dreamsofspike
Title: All Your Fault
Beta:cheshirejin
Character: Sam, Dean, Crowley
Pair: None
Author:Vexed
Words: 1227
Rating: PG
Summary:
Warnings: Fluff
Disclaimer: I make no claims of ownership or profits.
Written for the prompt (s): dreamsofspike asked for:
Can someone write me a bit of Crowley-centric hurt/comfort fic in which one or both Winchesters - grudging and grumbling about it at least at first - offers comfort/help to an unusually vulnerable Crowley?
Specifics don't matter, I just want Crowley hurt/comfort :P
Dean drizzled a small pot of salted butter over the extra large bowl of fresh popped popcorn. It always amazed him how his brother could be a picky little princesses when it came to most foods, but every now and then he had serious junk food demands. Like popcorn should only be popped in a real pot and not micro waved, or air popped. Sam said that was like choking down packing peanuts. The butter had to be real butter and kosher salt. Hell, when Sam did the shopping he bought that fancy butter from France just for the popcorn.
He turned to grab them each a fresh beer, when he heard something begin to creak on the other side of the room.
“Moose,this is your fault. I demand you fix it, and fix it now.” Dean would know that voice anywhere.
“You know I am pretty sure we didn’t have a trap door there this morning.” Dean said as he reached behind him for the nearest weapon he could find.
“You bloody idiots kept me prisoner here for how long? Did you really think I wouldn’t work out a way to slip back in if I chose to?” Crowley snapped.
“You chose tonight to slip back in? Do you have a craving for extra butter and salted popcorn? I doubt it was the thought of the cheesy holiday movies that Sam will pout his way into us watching?” Dean asked him.
“I’m here to demand your brother fix what he allowed to happen to me. I have spent too much time away from Hell because of the two of you.” Crowley told him.
“Crowley?” Sam asked from the doorway. “Dean, why is Crowley standing in our kitchen?” Sam asked his brother.
“No clue. He seems to think his newest drama queen moment is all your fault. You know Sammy, I wonder who he would blame his crap on if we weren’t around.” Dean asked Sam as he turned his brother back out the door.
“I’m sure he would find us and still blame us.” Sam said with a nod as he tried to steal a handful of popcorn.
“Oh, that could be useful, our own King of Hell Lowjack. Wait, never mind who knows when he would pop up.” Dean made a face at the thought of that happening.
“Like I don't have more pressing matters then watching you two.” Crowley rolled his eyes at the implied snub.
“Don’t know, you seem to think we can fix whatever is buggin’ you now. Last I checked you were the self proclaimed King of Hell, and we are still lowly hunters.” Dean called over his shoulder as he muscled Sam out of the doorway.
“I am the bloody King of Hell.” Crowley said to the now empty room. He stomped off to find the brothers.
It didn't take long for him to find them in Dean’s room watching something on a large television screen that he was far too sober and miserable to tolerate.
“Dean, he doesn't look so good.” Sam poked Dean when he noticed Crowley standing in the doorway.
Dean took a long look at Crowley and nodded in agreement. “Yeah, no popcorn for you. I didn’t know demons could break out like that.”
“I don’t have acne, you moron.”Crowley sighed as if the thought of walking into the same room as the Winchester brothers was going to physically pain him.
“Then what is wrong with you? I still don't see how it is my fault. We haven’t seen you in weeks.” Sam wondered aloud.
“You are the one that pumped me full of human blood. Did you even bother to read the fine print? I think the obvious answer to that would be no. If you had you might have warned me that I am now at risk for every little thing you humans carry.” Crowley snapped as he took off his black suit jacket and started to unbutton his dress shirt.
“I’m not sure what you think getting naked is going to accomplish but me and Sammy’ll pass on the invite.” Dean said as he grabbed his beer.
“I am not trying to get laid here. Even if I were I can guarantee it would be with someone more suitable than the likes of you two.” Crowley told them.
“Fine, then what are you doing stripping in Dean's room?” Sam asked him as he grabbed the remote to pause the movie on Dean’s television screen.
“I had the unfortunately ill timed idea to pop up here and make a few deals of my own. I just wanted to get away from the constant whining of my underlings.It seemed like an easy deal. A young mother wanted her no good ex to have to live the life he left her with. Minus the children for some reason she was not going to allow him near her precious little germ factories.” Crowley finished stripping off his dress shirt and his undershirt as well before he moved to sit on the end of the bed.
“Sadly, one of the little buggers took a shine to yours truly and it turns out it was infested.” Crowley said
“Infested? Man, you better not have fleas Crowley. I’m serious you leave any kind of bed bugs to make a home in my memory foam and I will find a way to make you pay.”Dean growled.
“The urchin didn’t have bugs. She had chickenpox and apparently it was in the contagious stage.” Crowley sighed.
“So you came here? Why?”Dean asked dumbfounded.
“Who else can I trust? My demons will use this information against me. or worse they will try to usurp my position.” Crowley explained.
“You think we won’t take advantage of the situation?” Dean asked him.
“Honestly, no I doubt you will. Do you two simpletons really want to worry about what my replacement would be like? Assuming someone was actually able to do me in?” Crowley asked in return.
“What do you expect of us, Crowley?” Sam asked him.
“You’re the humans I demand you fix me or at least keep me comfortable.” Crowley answered in voice that clearly said Sam should should have been smart enough to figure it out.
“That is not happening.” Dean told him. Sam elbowed his brother sharply in the ribs.
“Seriously, I nursed you through them. That was enough for me. I at least like you. Him, I don't like and don't care if he suffers.” Dean argued.
“He will be indebted to us. That has to be worth something.” Sam pointed out.
“Yeah, we know it won’t be worth squat. No I am telling you I refuse to help him with oatmeal baths and calamine lotion. I am certainly not going to listen to him whine and moan until he feels all King of Hellish again.” Dean insisted.
“Oatmeal baths and calamine lotion?” Crowley asked before snapping his fingers and making both items appear on the bed.
“Yeah, they both will help the itching.” Sam explained as he grabbed the oatmeal and motioned for the demon to head down the hallway.
“You will regret this, Sammy” Dean called out to them.
“Think of the blackmail material.” Sam whispered with a wink before catching up to Crowley.
Beta:cheshirejin
Character: Sam, Dean, Crowley
Pair: None
Author:Vexed
Words: 1227
Rating: PG
Summary:
Warnings: Fluff
Disclaimer: I make no claims of ownership or profits.
Written for the prompt (s): dreamsofspike asked for:
Can someone write me a bit of Crowley-centric hurt/comfort fic in which one or both Winchesters - grudging and grumbling about it at least at first - offers comfort/help to an unusually vulnerable Crowley?
Specifics don't matter, I just want Crowley hurt/comfort :P
Dean drizzled a small pot of salted butter over the extra large bowl of fresh popped popcorn. It always amazed him how his brother could be a picky little princesses when it came to most foods, but every now and then he had serious junk food demands. Like popcorn should only be popped in a real pot and not micro waved, or air popped. Sam said that was like choking down packing peanuts. The butter had to be real butter and kosher salt. Hell, when Sam did the shopping he bought that fancy butter from France just for the popcorn.
He turned to grab them each a fresh beer, when he heard something begin to creak on the other side of the room.
“Moose,this is your fault. I demand you fix it, and fix it now.” Dean would know that voice anywhere.
“You know I am pretty sure we didn’t have a trap door there this morning.” Dean said as he reached behind him for the nearest weapon he could find.
“You bloody idiots kept me prisoner here for how long? Did you really think I wouldn’t work out a way to slip back in if I chose to?” Crowley snapped.
“You chose tonight to slip back in? Do you have a craving for extra butter and salted popcorn? I doubt it was the thought of the cheesy holiday movies that Sam will pout his way into us watching?” Dean asked him.
“I’m here to demand your brother fix what he allowed to happen to me. I have spent too much time away from Hell because of the two of you.” Crowley told him.
“Crowley?” Sam asked from the doorway. “Dean, why is Crowley standing in our kitchen?” Sam asked his brother.
“No clue. He seems to think his newest drama queen moment is all your fault. You know Sammy, I wonder who he would blame his crap on if we weren’t around.” Dean asked Sam as he turned his brother back out the door.
“I’m sure he would find us and still blame us.” Sam said with a nod as he tried to steal a handful of popcorn.
“Oh, that could be useful, our own King of Hell Lowjack. Wait, never mind who knows when he would pop up.” Dean made a face at the thought of that happening.
“Like I don't have more pressing matters then watching you two.” Crowley rolled his eyes at the implied snub.
“Don’t know, you seem to think we can fix whatever is buggin’ you now. Last I checked you were the self proclaimed King of Hell, and we are still lowly hunters.” Dean called over his shoulder as he muscled Sam out of the doorway.
“I am the bloody King of Hell.” Crowley said to the now empty room. He stomped off to find the brothers.
It didn't take long for him to find them in Dean’s room watching something on a large television screen that he was far too sober and miserable to tolerate.
“Dean, he doesn't look so good.” Sam poked Dean when he noticed Crowley standing in the doorway.
Dean took a long look at Crowley and nodded in agreement. “Yeah, no popcorn for you. I didn’t know demons could break out like that.”
“I don’t have acne, you moron.”Crowley sighed as if the thought of walking into the same room as the Winchester brothers was going to physically pain him.
“Then what is wrong with you? I still don't see how it is my fault. We haven’t seen you in weeks.” Sam wondered aloud.
“You are the one that pumped me full of human blood. Did you even bother to read the fine print? I think the obvious answer to that would be no. If you had you might have warned me that I am now at risk for every little thing you humans carry.” Crowley snapped as he took off his black suit jacket and started to unbutton his dress shirt.
“I’m not sure what you think getting naked is going to accomplish but me and Sammy’ll pass on the invite.” Dean said as he grabbed his beer.
“I am not trying to get laid here. Even if I were I can guarantee it would be with someone more suitable than the likes of you two.” Crowley told them.
“Fine, then what are you doing stripping in Dean's room?” Sam asked him as he grabbed the remote to pause the movie on Dean’s television screen.
“I had the unfortunately ill timed idea to pop up here and make a few deals of my own. I just wanted to get away from the constant whining of my underlings.It seemed like an easy deal. A young mother wanted her no good ex to have to live the life he left her with. Minus the children for some reason she was not going to allow him near her precious little germ factories.” Crowley finished stripping off his dress shirt and his undershirt as well before he moved to sit on the end of the bed.
“Sadly, one of the little buggers took a shine to yours truly and it turns out it was infested.” Crowley said
“Infested? Man, you better not have fleas Crowley. I’m serious you leave any kind of bed bugs to make a home in my memory foam and I will find a way to make you pay.”Dean growled.
“The urchin didn’t have bugs. She had chickenpox and apparently it was in the contagious stage.” Crowley sighed.
“So you came here? Why?”Dean asked dumbfounded.
“Who else can I trust? My demons will use this information against me. or worse they will try to usurp my position.” Crowley explained.
“You think we won’t take advantage of the situation?” Dean asked him.
“Honestly, no I doubt you will. Do you two simpletons really want to worry about what my replacement would be like? Assuming someone was actually able to do me in?” Crowley asked in return.
“What do you expect of us, Crowley?” Sam asked him.
“You’re the humans I demand you fix me or at least keep me comfortable.” Crowley answered in voice that clearly said Sam should should have been smart enough to figure it out.
“That is not happening.” Dean told him. Sam elbowed his brother sharply in the ribs.
“Seriously, I nursed you through them. That was enough for me. I at least like you. Him, I don't like and don't care if he suffers.” Dean argued.
“He will be indebted to us. That has to be worth something.” Sam pointed out.
“Yeah, we know it won’t be worth squat. No I am telling you I refuse to help him with oatmeal baths and calamine lotion. I am certainly not going to listen to him whine and moan until he feels all King of Hellish again.” Dean insisted.
“Oatmeal baths and calamine lotion?” Crowley asked before snapping his fingers and making both items appear on the bed.
“Yeah, they both will help the itching.” Sam explained as he grabbed the oatmeal and motioned for the demon to head down the hallway.
“You will regret this, Sammy” Dean called out to them.
“Think of the blackmail material.” Sam whispered with a wink before catching up to Crowley.