[fic] Jerk
Title: Jerk
Fandom: Supernatural
Author: Kat and kira
Chars/Pairs: Dean, Sam
Genres: prank!fic
Warnings: implied geezer sex
Word Count: 656
Summary: Sam has an interesting tale…
Author’s note: Special thanks to vexed for helping us get their characters right.
Dean drove the big black ’67 Impala down the highway, while Sam sat quietly brooding in the passenger seat. They were about an hour away from Bobby Singer’s place and on their way to investigate a possible possession. It was routine stuff, even if Sam did spend more time on research than was necessary, not that Dean minded. Still, it was not like Sam to be so pensive about a slam dunk case.
“You seem awfully quiet, Sam, everything okay?”
Sam looked over at him, his bitch-face solidly in place. “Leave it alone, Dean.”
“Seriously, what’s eating you, Sammy?”
“You don’t want to know, Dean,” Sam said.
Dean briefly glanced over at him. “Why not?”
“Drop it, Dean,” Sam said tersely.
“Come on, you can tell me.” Dean grinned. “Did that waitress give you a fake phone number?”
“No, Dean!”
By now, Sam should have told him and the fact that he had not, made Dean whiny when he pursued it. “So what’s eating you?”
“You really want to know?” Sam said, obviously annoyed at his brother’s refusal to drop it.
“Yeah.”
Sam took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “I saw Bobby doing the naked tango… with, hell, I can’t even say who.”
Dean’s eyes went wide. “What?!” he looked over at his brother. “You’re kidding right? That was Bobby, right? Our crotchety old Bobby?”
“Yeah, Bobby.” Sam rolled his eyes at him.
“No way!!”
Sam’s expression grew pained. “Can we drop it now, Dean?”
Dean thought about it for a minute. “Can you at least tell me who you saw him with?” He grinned.
“Trust me, if I tell you, I can’t untell you.”
“I'll take my chances, Sammy, besides, how bad can it have been?”
“Dean, I wish I didn’t know.”
“That bad, hunh?” Dean said, his curiosity killing him.
“Dean, listen to me for once and just let it go.”
Rolling his eyes, he said, “You’ll tell me later, right?”
“Why would I tell you ever?”
“Cuz you're dying to tell me, Sammy-boy! I can see it in your eyes.”
Sam groaned. “You’re pathetic.”
“That’s why you love me, now spill it, Sam.”
Sam rolled his eyes. “Dean, trust me, you really don’t want to know.”
“Look, if it’s that bad and I’m grossed out, you can tell me ‘I told you so.’”
Sam groaned. “It was Crowley, alright?! Crowley!”
Dean slammed on the brakes. “CROWLEY?! You saw Bobby doing the nasty with Crowley?! EWW...”
“I tried to warn you.”
“Yeah…” Dean started driving again. “Damn… Bobby, hunh? And why Crowley?”
“I don't know, Dean. It’s not like I conducted a damn interview or something.”
“I know... But damn... Crowley...” Dean said, trying to wrap his brain around Sam’s little bombshell. “What made you walk in on them...?”
Sam sighed. “I was doing some research downstairs and Bobby had been upstairs a long time. He yelled ‘balls’ and I went to see what the problem was...” he said, letting his words hang there.
“Yeah?”
Sam groaned.
“So, uh, Sam?”
“What, Dean?”
“You know how Crowley likes to brag about how big he is?”
“Yeah?’
“Is he?”
“I wasn't looking, Dean! I was trying to get the hell out of there before my brain imploded!”
“Oh... Think Bobby'd tell me if I asked?”
“Why would you ask?!”
Dean mumbled softly, “Inquiring minds wanna know...”
Sam stared at him. “You have a thing for Crowley?”
“NO!! I’m just… curious.”
Sam snorted. “Because you’ve got a crush on him!”
“Do not!!”
“Right, you're just curious about every demon you know's endowment.”
“It's not like every demon brags about their endowment, Sam.”
“Riiiight… So you do have a crush on Crowley.”
“Yeah... I mean no! I mean... BITCH!”
Sam laughed. “Jerk!”
“Bitch” Dean said, changing the station. “Please tell me Barry White wasn't playing in the background.”
“Well...” Sam groaned. “You know I was just messing with you, right?”
“No way!!”
Sam smirked.
“BITCH!!”
“Jerk.”
Fandom: Supernatural
Author: Kat and kira
Chars/Pairs: Dean, Sam
Genres: prank!fic
Warnings: implied geezer sex
Word Count: 656
Summary: Sam has an interesting tale…
Author’s note: Special thanks to vexed for helping us get their characters right.
Dean drove the big black ’67 Impala down the highway, while Sam sat quietly brooding in the passenger seat. They were about an hour away from Bobby Singer’s place and on their way to investigate a possible possession. It was routine stuff, even if Sam did spend more time on research than was necessary, not that Dean minded. Still, it was not like Sam to be so pensive about a slam dunk case.
“You seem awfully quiet, Sam, everything okay?”
Sam looked over at him, his bitch-face solidly in place. “Leave it alone, Dean.”
“Seriously, what’s eating you, Sammy?”
“You don’t want to know, Dean,” Sam said.
Dean briefly glanced over at him. “Why not?”
“Drop it, Dean,” Sam said tersely.
“Come on, you can tell me.” Dean grinned. “Did that waitress give you a fake phone number?”
“No, Dean!”
By now, Sam should have told him and the fact that he had not, made Dean whiny when he pursued it. “So what’s eating you?”
“You really want to know?” Sam said, obviously annoyed at his brother’s refusal to drop it.
“Yeah.”
Sam took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “I saw Bobby doing the naked tango… with, hell, I can’t even say who.”
Dean’s eyes went wide. “What?!” he looked over at his brother. “You’re kidding right? That was Bobby, right? Our crotchety old Bobby?”
“Yeah, Bobby.” Sam rolled his eyes at him.
“No way!!”
Sam’s expression grew pained. “Can we drop it now, Dean?”
Dean thought about it for a minute. “Can you at least tell me who you saw him with?” He grinned.
“Trust me, if I tell you, I can’t untell you.”
“I'll take my chances, Sammy, besides, how bad can it have been?”
“Dean, I wish I didn’t know.”
“That bad, hunh?” Dean said, his curiosity killing him.
“Dean, listen to me for once and just let it go.”
Rolling his eyes, he said, “You’ll tell me later, right?”
“Why would I tell you ever?”
“Cuz you're dying to tell me, Sammy-boy! I can see it in your eyes.”
Sam groaned. “You’re pathetic.”
“That’s why you love me, now spill it, Sam.”
Sam rolled his eyes. “Dean, trust me, you really don’t want to know.”
“Look, if it’s that bad and I’m grossed out, you can tell me ‘I told you so.’”
Sam groaned. “It was Crowley, alright?! Crowley!”
Dean slammed on the brakes. “CROWLEY?! You saw Bobby doing the nasty with Crowley?! EWW...”
“I tried to warn you.”
“Yeah…” Dean started driving again. “Damn… Bobby, hunh? And why Crowley?”
“I don't know, Dean. It’s not like I conducted a damn interview or something.”
“I know... But damn... Crowley...” Dean said, trying to wrap his brain around Sam’s little bombshell. “What made you walk in on them...?”
Sam sighed. “I was doing some research downstairs and Bobby had been upstairs a long time. He yelled ‘balls’ and I went to see what the problem was...” he said, letting his words hang there.
“Yeah?”
Sam groaned.
“So, uh, Sam?”
“What, Dean?”
“You know how Crowley likes to brag about how big he is?”
“Yeah?’
“Is he?”
“I wasn't looking, Dean! I was trying to get the hell out of there before my brain imploded!”
“Oh... Think Bobby'd tell me if I asked?”
“Why would you ask?!”
Dean mumbled softly, “Inquiring minds wanna know...”
Sam stared at him. “You have a thing for Crowley?”
“NO!! I’m just… curious.”
Sam snorted. “Because you’ve got a crush on him!”
“Do not!!”
“Right, you're just curious about every demon you know's endowment.”
“It's not like every demon brags about their endowment, Sam.”
“Riiiight… So you do have a crush on Crowley.”
“Yeah... I mean no! I mean... BITCH!”
Sam laughed. “Jerk!”
“Bitch” Dean said, changing the station. “Please tell me Barry White wasn't playing in the background.”
“Well...” Sam groaned. “You know I was just messing with you, right?”
“No way!!”
Sam smirked.
“BITCH!!”
“Jerk.”