A Sense Of Humour
Name: A Sense Of Humour
Writer: jossujb
Beta: hollydermovoi
Rating: I guess it's PG? Just couple swear words.
Fandom: Supernatural
Pairings: Balthazar/Castiel, Uriel/Castiel
Warnings: Well, angelic relationships could be interpreted incestuous.
Disclaimer: I definitely do not own a thing, nor do I get money from this silliness.
A/N: Many thanks to my beta, who did amazing job to fix all grammar errors a non-native speaker makes. All remaining mishaps are still mine though, naturally.
A Sense Of Humour
Even if Uriel was the first Angel in he garrison to crack a joke he definitely wasn't funny. He barely knew the concept, and yet Castiel was in awe right from that terrible punch line. They had this painfully cute little inside club for all things human and Balthazar couldn't possibly be more envious.
It didn't even make any sense! Castiel barely even approved of any human behaviour, even when they took vessels and walked amongst men. It was a weakness and unworthy for a soldier of God to act outside the necessity of their orders, and Castiel was a good little Daddy's boy. Yet he was mesmerised by Uriel's so-bad-it's-sad attempts to be edgy, because he was "the funny one", like he had invented humour himself.
Balthazar could vomit just at the thought of it.
But all right, if humour was the thing that got Castiel's attention, Balthazar swore to become the most fucking hilarious Angel ever, but boy, did that plot backfire or what? The basic dilemma about it was that Angels simply didn't have a sense of humour at the first place, not even basic level understanding of it. What Uriel did was just a very shallow imitation of it, which got through as admissible behaviour, since it didn't actually include any true feeling at all. Only cruel mimicry.
When Balthazar actually managed to grasp the meaning of true humour, from what he honestly believed were his Father's best creations, the other Angels just didn't get it. Real humour went way over their heads, but most importantly, Castiel didn't approve it either.
"Brother, you've been acting very... strange. Many of our siblings are concerned about you. You mustn't do something to cause you to fall."
Balthazar made his current vessel's lips turn slightly upwards. Oh, were they really concerned? Worried? He didn't think it's possible. Not really. Good Angels don't have enough care in their veins to do so.
Castiel was probably ordered to snoop a bit. At the upper level they probably were furious to see lower class warrior to have any hints of original ideas. That's how they lost good soldiers, leaving them to marinate in their doubts. Wither, suffer, and then fall.
"I'm not falling", said Balthazar, lightly, like he was amused. So bluntly obvious lie really. Castiel didn't catch the drift.
"Are you sure? You've displayed many weaknesses lately. You've been absentminded brother, and it's been questioned if you can be put on battlefield alongside others", he talked, but left unsaid there most definitely were disciplinary actions already planned for Balthazar, no matter what anyone said at this point.
"It's always about fighting isn't it", Balthazar snapped quickly, still trying to hide the sharpest edge of bitterness from his brother's Grace. Captain of the garrison, yet so innocent he didn't even know where to look for real meanings.
Oh, and it was so easy to lie, Balthazar noticed, as Castiel never suspected anyone from his own flock not to tell the truth. Little did he know that Balthazar had deliberately hid everything of importance from him for as long as he could remember.
"Pff. It's Zachariah isn't it? He thinks I'm flawed", Balthazar contemplated quietly; disgusted by Zacharias' stupid-stupid-stupid smirk he knew he'd had, without humour in it either. But oh Heavenly Father did it display his superiority over foot soldiers like Holy Fire burning trough oblivious souls?
Was it really just him, wondered Balthazar, who really saw double standards set on lower and higher ranks? How could Castiel or others just ignore the fact that all fights since the beginning of time had been quarrels between Archangels and barely ever touched something their Father had an initiative.
It's all about petty jealousy and hurt feelings, all of it. Soldiers were just kept unattached so they could attack their own kind without feeling remorse.
So utterly sick.
"You do act like Anael did before -"
"You know that's funny", Balthazar interjected cutting Castiel off mid-sentence. "I've never heard you disagreeing on anything Anael did, even if she did eventually fell."
"I fail to see what's "funny" in that statement."
"I bet you do."
How can anyone be so flawless though? Balthazar had often questioned why he couldn't be more like Castiel and not feel betrayed and alone all the time. Why couldn't he feel Holy Ghost like rest of their Heavenly family claimed they did? All love Balthazar had ever felt was towards Castiel and only Castiel... right from the start, when they were formed out of dust and nothingness to these beautiful, beautiful creatures.
Guess they were made to be same, but incidentally were not similar.
"Sometimes I do not understand you Balthazar. I cannot but wonder how did you get all those emotions you're suddenly expressing. Maybe you are flawed."
It's incredible how someone with no malice in their voice, nor hatefulness anywhere near their lovely Grace, can hurt just by sticking right words together. Just as well Castiel could have punched his angelic blade trough Balthazar's chest, everything about him cut his flesh like knife through warm butter.
And all Balthazar had ever wanted was to have that same look of awe Castiel gave Uriel every single day for nothing, thus making life, most certainly, the most unfair affair indeed.
FIN