the unlit room, for snickfic
Title: the unlit room
Recipient: snickfic
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~3100
Warnings: none
Author's Notes: Thank you to my lovely beta! <3 The fic’s based on ideas in the Dear Writer letter, along with this prompt: Endverse fic involving at least two canon characters whom we didn’t see in the episode (although characters we did see are also welcome to be involved!).
It’s set in early Endverse, a while before the time shown in the episode. So it’s angst-lite, for an Endverse fic.
Summary: Endverse AU: Kevin, Jo, and Cas raid an abandoned hospital for supplies, and find something they don’t expect.
Kevin reached the edge of the forest. It was a cold night, the air still but sharp, the stars and half-moon clear in the sky. He stopped close behind a tree, his fingers curling against it, scratching along the bark. Grounding himself. He checked his gun, checked his flashlight and backpack. To his right, Jo and Cas were moving up alongside him. They each reached a tree of their own, and Kevin watched as they peered up and ahead. He could just make out their faces, the moon the only light he had.
The hospital loomed empty and silent in front of them. It was abandoned, but it seemed basically untouched. They were hoping that meant it still had supplies.
It would be a little unusual, but not totally out there. There were a lot of places like that now, courtesy of the apocalypse. It turned out that when everybody was busy dying, some shit got left behind. And in the wake of all the general death and destruction, attitudes had become a lot less thou shall not steal and a lot more get there first. So Kevin had learned to fight, learned to survive, developed some pretty kick-ass lock-picking skills. Found out all he could about angels, demons, everything else that went bump in the night. He’d even cut his hair. His mom would’ve appreciated that last one, he thought. If they’d actually seen each other in the last year and a half.
But they hadn’t. Kevin had been with Channing, and then he’d been alone. He’d only recently run across Camp Chiquita, some kind of resistance thing just getting started. He’d joined them, and he’d been out on a few of their missions already. Kevin was reliable, he could be counted on for a decent silent break-in.
It was weird: he used to be good at school, good at homework and tests and extra-curriculars. Now he was good at this. On his last mission, door swinging smoothly open, Jo clapping him quickly on the shoulder, Kevin had had a strange, almost out-of-body thought: I actually fucking miss the cello.
Usually he missed video games, TV, playing Magic. That was what he’d done for fun, before. Now he didn’t have fun: he stole shit and helped maintain cabins. He talked to people about camp borders and food supplies and how much fucking toilet paper they had. The cello, he supposed, was a party by comparison.
Kevin sighed to himself. He figured everyone had thoughts like this, sometimes. Thoughts that had absolutely no point to them at all. But Kevin didn’t need the cello, or Magic cards. Last break-in, he’d needed weapons, and this one, he needed meds. That was all.
He stood with the others, pausing, taking things in for a moment.
“Well,” Jo said, finally. “Dean didn’t mention that it was creepy as fuck.” She gave half a smile, aiming for nonchalant, but it came out a little wary, too.
Kevin didn’t blame her. There was definitely something about the place. The hospital was surrounded by forest on three sides, and on the last, just a parking lot and a long road stretching away. It left the hospital isolated, alone. Even the building itself was intimidating: tall and tower-like, the grey-stone walls reaching up and up, windows at regular intervals. Like a prison, Kevin thought. A total horror movie hospital. Something inside him went a little cold, then. He took a careful breath around it, exhaling slow. He’d had a lot of practice in trying to push away fear.
“Seriously,” he said to Jo, more to distract himself than anything. “I feel like Alan Wake right now.” As an attempt to break the tension, it fell pretty flat. Cas, nearest, just squinted at him slightly, clearly not getting it. Kevin shrugged a shoulder. “You weren’t a video game fan?” he asked.
It was always weird, using the past tense like that. But everyone did it. They all talked as though they used to be other people, and those people had died.
Cas did laugh, now, at Kevin’s question. Of course he did. Cas always laughed at the weirdest fucking things.
“Yeah, not so much,” he replied. Kevin saw him throw a glance at Jo, who rolled her eyes, amused. Kevin didn’t get the joke, but whatever. He liked Cas well enough, but he didn’t exactly understand the guy.
“So,” Kevin said, looking forwards again. They had a hospital to loot, after all. “We stick to the plan?”
“As it were,” Cas offered, unhelpfully.
“We do,” Jo said. She was taking point that night. Someone always did, even when it was this kind of mission. Which is to say, not much of one at all. “Right side exit, in and out. The area looks clear, but any sign of trouble, bail with what we’ve got. And we stick together - no one go off on your own.”
“Horror movie 101,” Kevin agreed.
Jo blinked at him, then pulled a face. “Oh, dude. Like I needed that thought right now.”
Kevin grinned at her. But when Jo motioned them forwards, when they left the cover of the forest, he felt it again. The coldness. He supposed, at the time, that it was still just fear.
--
Kevin’s flashlight skittered around the inside of the hospital, illuminating off-white walls, navy and white tiles. Totally empty. It wasn’t any warmer in here; he exhaled a breath of white air, just to confirm. He heard Cas come in, then Jo behind him, the door clicking firmly shut.
“Find directions to the pharmacy,” Jo muttered, aiming her flashlight along the inside wall. Kevin and Cas followed suit. They were in a wide hallway, and they moved forwards quickly, silently. Kevin kept throwing glances at the windows, at the forest, dark and tall outside. He couldn’t see anything. There was nothing out there, he knew that, just like there was nothing else inside. Only them. He had the stupid desire to turn off his flashlight, though, to be very quiet. He ignored it.
Turning back to scan the inside wall, Kevin spotted a door at the end, leading to a corner stairwell. Beside it, there was a large blue sign that looked pretty promising.
“Hup,” he said, jogging towards it, and the other two followed.
They all frowned at the sign, beams of light running haphazardly across it.
“Third floor,” Cas read, after a moment, and he grabbed the stairwell door. He pulled it open sharply, gesturing like he was ushering them through. As Kevin passed, he saw Cas look quickly to the window, then back down the hallway. Kevin breathed in slowly, let it out. Cas was expressionless, his face blank, but there was something unsettling about those looks.
“In and out,” Jo muttered from behind, like she was reminding herself.
There were no windows in the stairwell. Just their flashlights, trained on the floor.
The area they came out on was more enclosed. There was a window at the far end of the hallway, just by where it turned off to the right, but that was all. Otherwise, just a long stretch of doors.
They found the pharmacy at the very end. It wasn’t even locked.
“That’s handy,” Jo said, but she sounded uncertain. “Okay. You guys got your lists?”
Kevin pulled the scrap of paper out of his jeans pocket, waving it at Jo. The list had the important stuff they’d need to grab. There were all the usual weird medical names, scrawled in Cas’ messy handwriting: a copy of the list Dean had given him.
With one last glance down the hall, they headed into the pharmacy, jumping the counter to get to the goods in the back. Kevin took in the rows and rows of storage, all the identical white tubs in each one. He could see the little labels on each, the names of the medicines that were inside. Jesus. No easy signposts here. Kevin sighed. “Yeah, this’ll be quick.”
He heard the others laugh. It was dumb, to be pleased by that, but Kevin was pleased.
“Well,” Jo said, when they were all on the other side of the counter. “Let’s get started. Anything useful that’s not on the list, throw that it in too, okay? It’s like a guideline, I figure, so don’t ignore shit if we might need it.”
They each took a row, raising their flashlights to squint at the labels. It was slow work, checking the names against the lists, going carefully to avoid missing anything. It didn’t help that the room was seriously freezing. Kevin was probably imagining it, but it seemed even colder than outside.
After a while, though, he just wished it wasn’t so quiet. With their flashlights so narrowly focused, the room was dark all around them. It just left the sound of breathing, the occasional footsteps or shuffle of plastic pill bottles. He didn’t like it.
“Well,” Kevin said, accidentally too loud. Trying to thinking of something to fill the silence. “My mom’d be so proud if she saw me now.”
Jo huffed, one row over. But then she said, thoughtfully, “I don’t know. I think mine would, actually. You know? I think she’d be proud.” Kevin heard some pills rattle, like she’d pushed them back in a little too strongly. “Wherever she is,” Jo added, tiredly.
“Yeah,” Kevin said, thinking it over. Kevin’s mom had always been tough, always been the one sorting shit out. Why wouldn’t she be proud of him, doing the same? He said, “Yeah. That’s true, isn’t it. Same here.”
He knew his mom was out there, somewhere. He knew it, just like he knew the same thing about Channing; just like he believed now, one hundred percent, that Jo’s mom was too.
The silence that followed was more companionable. It was always a risk, talking about family, but sometimes it worked out. Sometimes Kevin would be helping with laundry, or working with someone to fix up a leaky roof, and they’d just end up talking about before. Family, school, jobs, wifi. He’d gotten to know Josephine that way. Charlie, too. It was never exactly cheerful, because what even was any more, but it was definitely good.
Cas didn’t add anything to their conversation. Didn’t mention his own family at all. Kevin wished he didn’t find that quite so disappointing. No one seemed to have a handle on Cas. He was a strange guy a lot of the time, and no one could explain it. No one seemed to know anything at all, other than Dean and his friends - Bobby, Chuck, Jo. Kevin wasn’t exactly close with any of them, but he’d tried asking Jo, one time. Just casually, just saying, “So what’s Cas’ deal?”
The look on her face had only made Kevin even more interested. But she hadn’t said much, and he hadn’t pushed. He wasn’t an asshole: people could have their secrets, people could be all mysterious if that was their thing.
Progress on the meds search was steady. Kevin had emptied a few tubs of the bottles into his backpack, and he’d fallen into a rhythm, his mind drifting as he worked. He was starting to realize that the horror movie jokes had been a bad idea. He kept having stupid thoughts. Wishing that the pharmacy was closer to the stairs. Wishing that there were windows. Thinking that he saw something, a shadow moving slowly at the end of his row. He was certain it was Cas or Jo fucking with him, but when he pointed his flashlight over, there was nothing there at all.
“Hey, Cas,” Jo said, suddenly. “Could you watch the door?”
There was a pause. It felt strangely heavy. And then Cas said, his tone easy, “Sure.”
Kevin heard him moving back to the pharmacy entrance, jumping the counter again. His landing seemed to echo, loud. It made Kevin wince.
It was - it was weird, Kevin thought. A weird decision, from Jo. There wasn’t exactly a need for a lookout right then. Not in a hospital that was clearly empty, the area around all quiet. Really, they needed Cas helping out with the search: it was taking long enough already.
That was what should’ve made sense. Kevin shouldn’t be feeling totally relieved to have someone standing guard.
He pushed the thoughts aside, and headed for the row of supplies after Jo’s. Turning into it, he scanned the aisle with his flashlight. There were pills all over the floor.
Kevin stopped. He stood very still.
“Uh,” he said.
There were empty orange bottles lying on their sides, and pills scattered right out across the tiles. Like they’d been dropped, or thrown. Kevin wondered how long they’d been there. Wondered why.
“You okay?” Jo called, and he jumped at the sound of her voice. The bottles in his backpack rattled with the movement. Kevin shuddered. Because of the cold, he thought, determinedly. He needed to stop being ridiculous.
“Yeah,” he told Jo. “Fine.”
He got back to it. The aisle was a good one, and he was taking out a bunch of the tubs, tipping the bottles into his backpack. Shivering with the cold. He was over-tired, probably. He just wanted this to be finished.
Reaching the wall at the end, he turned back, the flashlight hanging loosely in his hand, pointed right down. He saw that Cas had apparently gotten sick of playing lookout, because he was just standing at the beginning of the aisle, a dark shadow of a figure, blocking Kevin’s way out.
“Cas, man, what’re you doing?” Kevin asked, grimacing. He didn’t have time for this.
“What?” Cas called, from all the way over by the door.
Kevin blinked.
The figure in front of him was still there. It was way too large for Jo.
He felt suddenly frozen, all over.
Kevin opened his mouth. His flashlight was right in his hand. He just needed to - he could just move it up, to see. He could just.
“Guys,” Kevin tried, and it was barely a whisper. He gripped the flashlight tight, started to raise it.
The light went out.
He heard a sudden movement, like a gust of wind.
“Fuck,” Kevin gasped. He sprinted forwards - the only way out, the only fucking way, right at the shadow, and, “Guys, guys, there is a fucking ghost in here - ” But he was barely making any sound at all.
And then he was ice cold. He tried to breathe, couldn’t, and he thought, it’s been so cold in here. This whole time, it’s been freezing. He thought, I’m so stupid. I’m gonna die because I’m a fucking idiot, I’m never going to see -
Then he heard, “Kevin?” And there was a blissful sweep of light, Jo’s flashlight pointing down the aisle. “Shit,” she said immediately, but it had been enough, the shadow had vanished, just for a moment, and Kevin was sprinting forwards again.
“Ghost!” he shouted, in case it wasn’t clear. He barreled into Jo, pulling her along with him.
“Yeah,” Jo said, “fuck, fuck, I should’ve known - ” and they headed for the counter, scrambling over, and Kevin hit the ground on the other side. Jo’s flashlight had gone out too, and Kevin was still shivering, his knees had jarred from the landing. He gasped a breath.
“Kevin, come on,” Cas said, from the door. “Kevin!” he barked, alarmed like Kevin had never heard him before. Kevin pushed himself up, dragged himself forwards.
Then they were in the corridor, only Cas’ flashlight working now, the light flying all around, and they were sprinting for the stairs. Kevin could hear it behind him, the whipping wind, he could feel the ice right at his back, and then his backpack flew off his shoulder. Pill bottles hit the floor, bouncing, clattering around.
“Oh, fuck,” Cas groaned. “We need those,” and he actually fucking hesitated.
“Castiel!” Jo snapped, fear and frustration combined, and luckily, he started moving again.
And even running, even hurrying into the stairwell, all of them nearly falling right down, Kevin realised what she’d said. Castiel? It was a sudden, crazy understanding.
When they crashed out onto the ground floor, the side exit seemed incredibly far away. Like in dreams Kevin had had as a kid - had recently, as well - trying desperately to run and knowing he’d never make it. The ghost was right there, they would never -
And then, somehow, they were through the doorway, and they were out in the woods, still going, tripping on the uneven ground.
“Kevin,” Jo said, from behind. She’d stopped, he registered. Kevin turned around, still moving, still stumbling back, and then he stopped too.
The shadow was far behind now. Back in the open door. Standing, unmoving, totally motionless. Jo said, “I don’t think it can leave.”
Cas aimed his flashlight at the door, and the shadow disappeared.
The three of them stood in the dark.
“Holy fuck,” Kevin said, eventually. His heart was pounding, his body still on high alert. “What the hell - what kind of ghost was that?”
Jo shook her head. “Couldn’t tell.”
“Jesus.”
They were silent a moment more. And then, unbelievably, Cas began to laugh.
“Dude,” Kevin said, but he felt his own lips twitch, and then Jo snorted, and that was it. All three of them were laughing, totally helpless, totally dumb. Cas even leant back against a tree, bringing a hand up over his face.
“That was fun,” he offered, when they’d got control again a little.
“Fun,” Kevin echoed, huffing again, shaking his head. “Right.”
But, he thought, it kind of had been, actually. Not the part where they might’ve died. Not the running for their lives. But that last bit, afterwards. Knowing that they’d made it. That had been all right.
It was no night with Channing, no pizza and Portal evening. No getting to see his mom again. But for now, it was something.
It wasn’t until they started heading to the meet point, Jo searching her backpack for the walkie to update Dean, that Kevin finally remembered what she’d said. “Hey,” he said, when it hit him again. “Hey. Castiel? That’s your name?” Because Kevin knew some things, now - everyone knew some things now - about angels.
If he hadn’t been sure before, if he hadn’t been certain of exactly what that meant, the silence that followed confirmed it. Kevin scrubbed a hand through his hair, kind of at a loss. Here it was, the mystery explained. He understood, now. “Jesus Christ,” he said, unable to think of anything else.
And Cas said, “Well. Not exactly.”
Recipient: snickfic
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~3100
Warnings: none
Author's Notes: Thank you to my lovely beta! <3 The fic’s based on ideas in the Dear Writer letter, along with this prompt: Endverse fic involving at least two canon characters whom we didn’t see in the episode (although characters we did see are also welcome to be involved!).
It’s set in early Endverse, a while before the time shown in the episode. So it’s angst-lite, for an Endverse fic.
Summary: Endverse AU: Kevin, Jo, and Cas raid an abandoned hospital for supplies, and find something they don’t expect.
Kevin reached the edge of the forest. It was a cold night, the air still but sharp, the stars and half-moon clear in the sky. He stopped close behind a tree, his fingers curling against it, scratching along the bark. Grounding himself. He checked his gun, checked his flashlight and backpack. To his right, Jo and Cas were moving up alongside him. They each reached a tree of their own, and Kevin watched as they peered up and ahead. He could just make out their faces, the moon the only light he had.
The hospital loomed empty and silent in front of them. It was abandoned, but it seemed basically untouched. They were hoping that meant it still had supplies.
It would be a little unusual, but not totally out there. There were a lot of places like that now, courtesy of the apocalypse. It turned out that when everybody was busy dying, some shit got left behind. And in the wake of all the general death and destruction, attitudes had become a lot less thou shall not steal and a lot more get there first. So Kevin had learned to fight, learned to survive, developed some pretty kick-ass lock-picking skills. Found out all he could about angels, demons, everything else that went bump in the night. He’d even cut his hair. His mom would’ve appreciated that last one, he thought. If they’d actually seen each other in the last year and a half.
But they hadn’t. Kevin had been with Channing, and then he’d been alone. He’d only recently run across Camp Chiquita, some kind of resistance thing just getting started. He’d joined them, and he’d been out on a few of their missions already. Kevin was reliable, he could be counted on for a decent silent break-in.
It was weird: he used to be good at school, good at homework and tests and extra-curriculars. Now he was good at this. On his last mission, door swinging smoothly open, Jo clapping him quickly on the shoulder, Kevin had had a strange, almost out-of-body thought: I actually fucking miss the cello.
Usually he missed video games, TV, playing Magic. That was what he’d done for fun, before. Now he didn’t have fun: he stole shit and helped maintain cabins. He talked to people about camp borders and food supplies and how much fucking toilet paper they had. The cello, he supposed, was a party by comparison.
Kevin sighed to himself. He figured everyone had thoughts like this, sometimes. Thoughts that had absolutely no point to them at all. But Kevin didn’t need the cello, or Magic cards. Last break-in, he’d needed weapons, and this one, he needed meds. That was all.
He stood with the others, pausing, taking things in for a moment.
“Well,” Jo said, finally. “Dean didn’t mention that it was creepy as fuck.” She gave half a smile, aiming for nonchalant, but it came out a little wary, too.
Kevin didn’t blame her. There was definitely something about the place. The hospital was surrounded by forest on three sides, and on the last, just a parking lot and a long road stretching away. It left the hospital isolated, alone. Even the building itself was intimidating: tall and tower-like, the grey-stone walls reaching up and up, windows at regular intervals. Like a prison, Kevin thought. A total horror movie hospital. Something inside him went a little cold, then. He took a careful breath around it, exhaling slow. He’d had a lot of practice in trying to push away fear.
“Seriously,” he said to Jo, more to distract himself than anything. “I feel like Alan Wake right now.” As an attempt to break the tension, it fell pretty flat. Cas, nearest, just squinted at him slightly, clearly not getting it. Kevin shrugged a shoulder. “You weren’t a video game fan?” he asked.
It was always weird, using the past tense like that. But everyone did it. They all talked as though they used to be other people, and those people had died.
Cas did laugh, now, at Kevin’s question. Of course he did. Cas always laughed at the weirdest fucking things.
“Yeah, not so much,” he replied. Kevin saw him throw a glance at Jo, who rolled her eyes, amused. Kevin didn’t get the joke, but whatever. He liked Cas well enough, but he didn’t exactly understand the guy.
“So,” Kevin said, looking forwards again. They had a hospital to loot, after all. “We stick to the plan?”
“As it were,” Cas offered, unhelpfully.
“We do,” Jo said. She was taking point that night. Someone always did, even when it was this kind of mission. Which is to say, not much of one at all. “Right side exit, in and out. The area looks clear, but any sign of trouble, bail with what we’ve got. And we stick together - no one go off on your own.”
“Horror movie 101,” Kevin agreed.
Jo blinked at him, then pulled a face. “Oh, dude. Like I needed that thought right now.”
Kevin grinned at her. But when Jo motioned them forwards, when they left the cover of the forest, he felt it again. The coldness. He supposed, at the time, that it was still just fear.
--
Kevin’s flashlight skittered around the inside of the hospital, illuminating off-white walls, navy and white tiles. Totally empty. It wasn’t any warmer in here; he exhaled a breath of white air, just to confirm. He heard Cas come in, then Jo behind him, the door clicking firmly shut.
“Find directions to the pharmacy,” Jo muttered, aiming her flashlight along the inside wall. Kevin and Cas followed suit. They were in a wide hallway, and they moved forwards quickly, silently. Kevin kept throwing glances at the windows, at the forest, dark and tall outside. He couldn’t see anything. There was nothing out there, he knew that, just like there was nothing else inside. Only them. He had the stupid desire to turn off his flashlight, though, to be very quiet. He ignored it.
Turning back to scan the inside wall, Kevin spotted a door at the end, leading to a corner stairwell. Beside it, there was a large blue sign that looked pretty promising.
“Hup,” he said, jogging towards it, and the other two followed.
They all frowned at the sign, beams of light running haphazardly across it.
“Third floor,” Cas read, after a moment, and he grabbed the stairwell door. He pulled it open sharply, gesturing like he was ushering them through. As Kevin passed, he saw Cas look quickly to the window, then back down the hallway. Kevin breathed in slowly, let it out. Cas was expressionless, his face blank, but there was something unsettling about those looks.
“In and out,” Jo muttered from behind, like she was reminding herself.
There were no windows in the stairwell. Just their flashlights, trained on the floor.
The area they came out on was more enclosed. There was a window at the far end of the hallway, just by where it turned off to the right, but that was all. Otherwise, just a long stretch of doors.
They found the pharmacy at the very end. It wasn’t even locked.
“That’s handy,” Jo said, but she sounded uncertain. “Okay. You guys got your lists?”
Kevin pulled the scrap of paper out of his jeans pocket, waving it at Jo. The list had the important stuff they’d need to grab. There were all the usual weird medical names, scrawled in Cas’ messy handwriting: a copy of the list Dean had given him.
With one last glance down the hall, they headed into the pharmacy, jumping the counter to get to the goods in the back. Kevin took in the rows and rows of storage, all the identical white tubs in each one. He could see the little labels on each, the names of the medicines that were inside. Jesus. No easy signposts here. Kevin sighed. “Yeah, this’ll be quick.”
He heard the others laugh. It was dumb, to be pleased by that, but Kevin was pleased.
“Well,” Jo said, when they were all on the other side of the counter. “Let’s get started. Anything useful that’s not on the list, throw that it in too, okay? It’s like a guideline, I figure, so don’t ignore shit if we might need it.”
They each took a row, raising their flashlights to squint at the labels. It was slow work, checking the names against the lists, going carefully to avoid missing anything. It didn’t help that the room was seriously freezing. Kevin was probably imagining it, but it seemed even colder than outside.
After a while, though, he just wished it wasn’t so quiet. With their flashlights so narrowly focused, the room was dark all around them. It just left the sound of breathing, the occasional footsteps or shuffle of plastic pill bottles. He didn’t like it.
“Well,” Kevin said, accidentally too loud. Trying to thinking of something to fill the silence. “My mom’d be so proud if she saw me now.”
Jo huffed, one row over. But then she said, thoughtfully, “I don’t know. I think mine would, actually. You know? I think she’d be proud.” Kevin heard some pills rattle, like she’d pushed them back in a little too strongly. “Wherever she is,” Jo added, tiredly.
“Yeah,” Kevin said, thinking it over. Kevin’s mom had always been tough, always been the one sorting shit out. Why wouldn’t she be proud of him, doing the same? He said, “Yeah. That’s true, isn’t it. Same here.”
He knew his mom was out there, somewhere. He knew it, just like he knew the same thing about Channing; just like he believed now, one hundred percent, that Jo’s mom was too.
The silence that followed was more companionable. It was always a risk, talking about family, but sometimes it worked out. Sometimes Kevin would be helping with laundry, or working with someone to fix up a leaky roof, and they’d just end up talking about before. Family, school, jobs, wifi. He’d gotten to know Josephine that way. Charlie, too. It was never exactly cheerful, because what even was any more, but it was definitely good.
Cas didn’t add anything to their conversation. Didn’t mention his own family at all. Kevin wished he didn’t find that quite so disappointing. No one seemed to have a handle on Cas. He was a strange guy a lot of the time, and no one could explain it. No one seemed to know anything at all, other than Dean and his friends - Bobby, Chuck, Jo. Kevin wasn’t exactly close with any of them, but he’d tried asking Jo, one time. Just casually, just saying, “So what’s Cas’ deal?”
The look on her face had only made Kevin even more interested. But she hadn’t said much, and he hadn’t pushed. He wasn’t an asshole: people could have their secrets, people could be all mysterious if that was their thing.
Progress on the meds search was steady. Kevin had emptied a few tubs of the bottles into his backpack, and he’d fallen into a rhythm, his mind drifting as he worked. He was starting to realize that the horror movie jokes had been a bad idea. He kept having stupid thoughts. Wishing that the pharmacy was closer to the stairs. Wishing that there were windows. Thinking that he saw something, a shadow moving slowly at the end of his row. He was certain it was Cas or Jo fucking with him, but when he pointed his flashlight over, there was nothing there at all.
“Hey, Cas,” Jo said, suddenly. “Could you watch the door?”
There was a pause. It felt strangely heavy. And then Cas said, his tone easy, “Sure.”
Kevin heard him moving back to the pharmacy entrance, jumping the counter again. His landing seemed to echo, loud. It made Kevin wince.
It was - it was weird, Kevin thought. A weird decision, from Jo. There wasn’t exactly a need for a lookout right then. Not in a hospital that was clearly empty, the area around all quiet. Really, they needed Cas helping out with the search: it was taking long enough already.
That was what should’ve made sense. Kevin shouldn’t be feeling totally relieved to have someone standing guard.
He pushed the thoughts aside, and headed for the row of supplies after Jo’s. Turning into it, he scanned the aisle with his flashlight. There were pills all over the floor.
Kevin stopped. He stood very still.
“Uh,” he said.
There were empty orange bottles lying on their sides, and pills scattered right out across the tiles. Like they’d been dropped, or thrown. Kevin wondered how long they’d been there. Wondered why.
“You okay?” Jo called, and he jumped at the sound of her voice. The bottles in his backpack rattled with the movement. Kevin shuddered. Because of the cold, he thought, determinedly. He needed to stop being ridiculous.
“Yeah,” he told Jo. “Fine.”
He got back to it. The aisle was a good one, and he was taking out a bunch of the tubs, tipping the bottles into his backpack. Shivering with the cold. He was over-tired, probably. He just wanted this to be finished.
Reaching the wall at the end, he turned back, the flashlight hanging loosely in his hand, pointed right down. He saw that Cas had apparently gotten sick of playing lookout, because he was just standing at the beginning of the aisle, a dark shadow of a figure, blocking Kevin’s way out.
“Cas, man, what’re you doing?” Kevin asked, grimacing. He didn’t have time for this.
“What?” Cas called, from all the way over by the door.
Kevin blinked.
The figure in front of him was still there. It was way too large for Jo.
He felt suddenly frozen, all over.
Kevin opened his mouth. His flashlight was right in his hand. He just needed to - he could just move it up, to see. He could just.
“Guys,” Kevin tried, and it was barely a whisper. He gripped the flashlight tight, started to raise it.
The light went out.
He heard a sudden movement, like a gust of wind.
“Fuck,” Kevin gasped. He sprinted forwards - the only way out, the only fucking way, right at the shadow, and, “Guys, guys, there is a fucking ghost in here - ” But he was barely making any sound at all.
And then he was ice cold. He tried to breathe, couldn’t, and he thought, it’s been so cold in here. This whole time, it’s been freezing. He thought, I’m so stupid. I’m gonna die because I’m a fucking idiot, I’m never going to see -
Then he heard, “Kevin?” And there was a blissful sweep of light, Jo’s flashlight pointing down the aisle. “Shit,” she said immediately, but it had been enough, the shadow had vanished, just for a moment, and Kevin was sprinting forwards again.
“Ghost!” he shouted, in case it wasn’t clear. He barreled into Jo, pulling her along with him.
“Yeah,” Jo said, “fuck, fuck, I should’ve known - ” and they headed for the counter, scrambling over, and Kevin hit the ground on the other side. Jo’s flashlight had gone out too, and Kevin was still shivering, his knees had jarred from the landing. He gasped a breath.
“Kevin, come on,” Cas said, from the door. “Kevin!” he barked, alarmed like Kevin had never heard him before. Kevin pushed himself up, dragged himself forwards.
Then they were in the corridor, only Cas’ flashlight working now, the light flying all around, and they were sprinting for the stairs. Kevin could hear it behind him, the whipping wind, he could feel the ice right at his back, and then his backpack flew off his shoulder. Pill bottles hit the floor, bouncing, clattering around.
“Oh, fuck,” Cas groaned. “We need those,” and he actually fucking hesitated.
“Castiel!” Jo snapped, fear and frustration combined, and luckily, he started moving again.
And even running, even hurrying into the stairwell, all of them nearly falling right down, Kevin realised what she’d said. Castiel? It was a sudden, crazy understanding.
When they crashed out onto the ground floor, the side exit seemed incredibly far away. Like in dreams Kevin had had as a kid - had recently, as well - trying desperately to run and knowing he’d never make it. The ghost was right there, they would never -
And then, somehow, they were through the doorway, and they were out in the woods, still going, tripping on the uneven ground.
“Kevin,” Jo said, from behind. She’d stopped, he registered. Kevin turned around, still moving, still stumbling back, and then he stopped too.
The shadow was far behind now. Back in the open door. Standing, unmoving, totally motionless. Jo said, “I don’t think it can leave.”
Cas aimed his flashlight at the door, and the shadow disappeared.
The three of them stood in the dark.
“Holy fuck,” Kevin said, eventually. His heart was pounding, his body still on high alert. “What the hell - what kind of ghost was that?”
Jo shook her head. “Couldn’t tell.”
“Jesus.”
They were silent a moment more. And then, unbelievably, Cas began to laugh.
“Dude,” Kevin said, but he felt his own lips twitch, and then Jo snorted, and that was it. All three of them were laughing, totally helpless, totally dumb. Cas even leant back against a tree, bringing a hand up over his face.
“That was fun,” he offered, when they’d got control again a little.
“Fun,” Kevin echoed, huffing again, shaking his head. “Right.”
But, he thought, it kind of had been, actually. Not the part where they might’ve died. Not the running for their lives. But that last bit, afterwards. Knowing that they’d made it. That had been all right.
It was no night with Channing, no pizza and Portal evening. No getting to see his mom again. But for now, it was something.
It wasn’t until they started heading to the meet point, Jo searching her backpack for the walkie to update Dean, that Kevin finally remembered what she’d said. “Hey,” he said, when it hit him again. “Hey. Castiel? That’s your name?” Because Kevin knew some things, now - everyone knew some things now - about angels.
If he hadn’t been sure before, if he hadn’t been certain of exactly what that meant, the silence that followed confirmed it. Kevin scrubbed a hand through his hair, kind of at a loss. Here it was, the mystery explained. He understood, now. “Jesus Christ,” he said, unable to think of anything else.
And Cas said, “Well. Not exactly.”