Gems from "The Gospelles of Dystaues", 1510
For certayne & for also true as the gospell whan a man lyeth with his wife, or wt his loue hauynge his fete foule and stynkynge, & it happen that he engendre a sone, he shall haue an euyll & a stynkynge breathe, & yf it be a doughter she shall haue it stynkynge behind.
Who that absteyneth hym from wypynge of his ars wt leues or other grene thynge that hathe growen vppon the erthe: he shal not haue no euyl in his backe nor in his rains.
Whan a chylde is borne before that he be baptysed beware that ye bere hym not vpon your lefte arme, for than shall he be lefte handed all his lyfe.
Whan a wyfe dothe ryse on the nyght for to pysse, and that she stryde ouer her husbande knowe that and he haue ony of his membres styffe that it shall waxe softe yf she retorne not theder as she had striden.
Whan ye se a cat syt in a wyndowe in the sonne, & that she lycke her ars, and that one of her fete be aboue her ere ye nede not to doubte but yt it shall rayne that daye.
I assure you that he that pysseth bytwene two houses or agaynst the sonne, knowe that he shall haue sore eyen.
I tell to you for a trouthe my neyghboures that whan one putteth clene shetes vppon a bedde the aungell of god reposeth hym therin tyll the tyme that one haue farted, or fysted therin.
Yf a woman wyll haue her husbande to loue one of her chyldren better than another, let her make hym ete a pece of the eres of her dogge: and the chylde the other halfe: and they shall loue soo feruently togyder that with payne they maye be one from another.
Whan a woman lyeth with her husbande and that she wolde sooner haue a sone than a doughter, it behoueth her for to holde her handes close whyle yt her husbande dothe the werke of nature, & for a trouthe she shall haue a sone.
Who that absteyneth hym from wypynge of his ars wt leues or other grene thynge that hathe growen vppon the erthe: he shal not haue no euyl in his backe nor in his rains.
Whan a chylde is borne before that he be baptysed beware that ye bere hym not vpon your lefte arme, for than shall he be lefte handed all his lyfe.
Whan a wyfe dothe ryse on the nyght for to pysse, and that she stryde ouer her husbande knowe that and he haue ony of his membres styffe that it shall waxe softe yf she retorne not theder as she had striden.
Whan ye se a cat syt in a wyndowe in the sonne, & that she lycke her ars, and that one of her fete be aboue her ere ye nede not to doubte but yt it shall rayne that daye.
I assure you that he that pysseth bytwene two houses or agaynst the sonne, knowe that he shall haue sore eyen.
I tell to you for a trouthe my neyghboures that whan one putteth clene shetes vppon a bedde the aungell of god reposeth hym therin tyll the tyme that one haue farted, or fysted therin.
Yf a woman wyll haue her husbande to loue one of her chyldren better than another, let her make hym ete a pece of the eres of her dogge: and the chylde the other halfe: and they shall loue soo feruently togyder that with payne they maye be one from another.
Whan a woman lyeth with her husbande and that she wolde sooner haue a sone than a doughter, it behoueth her for to holde her handes close whyle yt her husbande dothe the werke of nature, & for a trouthe she shall haue a sone.