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[of_arabia]

My dear residents of the Gilded Castle,
I will mutilate you beyond all recognition of your questionable humanity if you bring so much as a drop of that paint into the house.
Sincerely,

Comments

text/letter

[of_arabia]

Julian,

I suppose I do have a particular prejudice against parasites and other lesser forms of 'life.'

The recent weather would be very much improved without the large clouds of paint.

Sincerely,

text/letter

[bloodaholic]

Arabia, Dear Arabia,

I am quite insulted by your insinuations. I have tried very hard to be on my best behaviour and I have always conducted myself with as much humanity as anyone else.

I am prepared to forgive you if you apologise.

Kind regards,
J. Dixon-Ross
(also present: R. Hargreaves, who helped with the words)

PS. I think the paint bubbles are quite charming and would be sad to see them go.

passive-aggressive penpals

[of_arabia]

Julian,

Please, feel free to share your forgiveness with your friend in my stead. I am sure he will have much greater use for it considering your insult means absolutely nothing to me.

in my mind it's even funnier if their respective rooms aren't even that far away

[bloodaholic]

Dear Arabia,

I'm sorry to say this in such strong terms but you're rather mean. I think our discourse here has truly proven which one of us possesses the most humanity.

Yours sincerely,
J. Dixon-Ross
(still present: R. Hargraves, who this time helped with the argument)

like twelve year old girls

[of_arabia]

Julian,

I suppose it would be whichever of us has less in common with a leech.

[bloodaholic]

Arabia,

I think there is more to being human than eating habits. Your conduct has been most unsympathetic and very unbecoming.

Sincerely,
J. Dixon-Ross

[of_arabia]

I aim to please.