Depression...
thou art a heartless bitch.
And why do you have to hit me now of all times? Christ, it's summer, I'm trying to be happy. Thanks for ruining it.
It hasn't even been this bad for a while, and then all of the sudden out of the blue, here I am feeling like a worthless piece of shit. Why? I haven't even been doing anything to trigger it.
Maybe it's the fact that I'm 16 years old and I haven't even have a guy look at me the right way yet. Or maybe it's because everyone I try to have a relationship with runs in the other direction. I guess I'm either really fucking boring or just really unattractive. Or maybe it's both.
But how do you know if you're a boring person? If someone doesn't want to talk to me or stops talking to me, that doesn't mean I'm boring, does it? Am I boring?
I guess I just feel really alone. Like no one cares or ever will. Or I'll be alone for the rest of my fucking life. Because every time something might happen, they either leave, or I get there too late and they already have somebody. Like fuck that man. Fine, I don't need you.
I can't even really explain it, but I guess that's just how it is. Depression makes you feel....well, depressed. And there's nothing I can do about it right now. The sadness, lonliness, lack of motivation and all that lovely stuff will just have to run it's course.
Whatever.
I guess I won't be updating my fic any time soon, because I really don't fucking feel like writing. I don't even feel like reading some fluff to make myself feel better.
And I don't want sympathy, I dont' want fucking pity. I just wanted to get it the fuck out of my system.
God. I hate life right now.
And why do you have to hit me now of all times? Christ, it's summer, I'm trying to be happy. Thanks for ruining it.
It hasn't even been this bad for a while, and then all of the sudden out of the blue, here I am feeling like a worthless piece of shit. Why? I haven't even been doing anything to trigger it.
Maybe it's the fact that I'm 16 years old and I haven't even have a guy look at me the right way yet. Or maybe it's because everyone I try to have a relationship with runs in the other direction. I guess I'm either really fucking boring or just really unattractive. Or maybe it's both.
But how do you know if you're a boring person? If someone doesn't want to talk to me or stops talking to me, that doesn't mean I'm boring, does it? Am I boring?
I guess I just feel really alone. Like no one cares or ever will. Or I'll be alone for the rest of my fucking life. Because every time something might happen, they either leave, or I get there too late and they already have somebody. Like fuck that man. Fine, I don't need you.
I can't even really explain it, but I guess that's just how it is. Depression makes you feel....well, depressed. And there's nothing I can do about it right now. The sadness, lonliness, lack of motivation and all that lovely stuff will just have to run it's course.
Whatever.
I guess I won't be updating my fic any time soon, because I really don't fucking feel like writing. I don't even feel like reading some fluff to make myself feel better.
And I don't want sympathy, I dont' want fucking pity. I just wanted to get it the fuck out of my system.
God. I hate life right now.