What to do
Life without internet gives me mix feelings. Sometimes it sucks and others I think it is nice due to the fact that I'm not tied to my computer and constantly checking my email and myspace and livejournal and all that shit that nothing really ever happens on. The one main problem I have encountered though is the lack of being able to vent or just write. Sure I've written a song or two but, to actually sit down and map something out or bitch or just fucking write. That part kind of is lame. And I can't check on shit or get phone numbers or chat or whatever. Damn. I think I'm going to get it soon. Ah whatever.
The Point of this entry is that I've been thinking a lot the past day or two...or three. Very thoughtful days. Just one of those things that I can't seem to figure out. And believe me, if you don't already know, I'm not a person that doesn't like to know things or have them figured out. I mean, have you ever had a variety of situations that you've tried a variety of different approaches with and still have pretty much the same outcome? That seems to be the problem I'm running into. As lame as I feel saying it, it's girls. I can honestly say that I am not out looking. But, that's a dirty lie. In the back of my mind, I'm always looking. I can't stop. I feel better with someone there. It isn't a co-dependent thing at all. I think it's a knowing that someone shares the same feelings for you as you do for them. And that's just nice.
Man, Gobstoppers are smaller than they used to be. I swear.
So, I wonder if the better solution is just to stop trying. I can't though. If someone actually peaks my interest, I can't not be interested is seeing the possible outcome. But, I also feel that I am so different when it comes to relationships that I wonder how many people can actually handle that shit. I wonder if I should just stop trying.
SpiRaLzzzz
*end transmission*
The Point of this entry is that I've been thinking a lot the past day or two...or three. Very thoughtful days. Just one of those things that I can't seem to figure out. And believe me, if you don't already know, I'm not a person that doesn't like to know things or have them figured out. I mean, have you ever had a variety of situations that you've tried a variety of different approaches with and still have pretty much the same outcome? That seems to be the problem I'm running into. As lame as I feel saying it, it's girls. I can honestly say that I am not out looking. But, that's a dirty lie. In the back of my mind, I'm always looking. I can't stop. I feel better with someone there. It isn't a co-dependent thing at all. I think it's a knowing that someone shares the same feelings for you as you do for them. And that's just nice.
Man, Gobstoppers are smaller than they used to be. I swear.
So, I wonder if the better solution is just to stop trying. I can't though. If someone actually peaks my interest, I can't not be interested is seeing the possible outcome. But, I also feel that I am so different when it comes to relationships that I wonder how many people can actually handle that shit. I wonder if I should just stop trying.
SpiRaLzzzz
*end transmission*