Your face is like reading an old magazine.
I just survived for whatever reason and thank god everyone else too a minor car accident, which considering the setting and circumstances it happened in, could've been anything BUT minor, had she gone just a little faster, had I just turned a little sharper, had there been anybody close behind me, etc. Either one of us could've possibly not survived or at very least, sustained body and massive car damage, which would drown us both in debt and misery for months to come.
Thankfully noone was hurt at all, I made it to work fairly on time, and thankfully, my dad came through for me at the last minute. I don't know what i'd do without his support. I'd be stuck completely broke, late for work just a block away, and be trapped standing there looking like a fool or worse a criminal, explaining to a cop that i don't know what happened to the front license plate, (it fell completely off, was smashed to pieces) and since I have never been in an accident before nor owned the car I had no real idea what the insurance papers or registration looked like then or where they were even kept in the glove compartment. i didn't even know before this what insurance I was on. Fancy looking up at a cop and saying "Well this thing HAD a license plate on it, I'm not sure when or how exactly it fell off, and I don't really know what insurance I'm on, or what happened to my registration papers..." and, then, IF I had figured it out, showed him a document which didn't have my name on it since the car doesn't belong to me. And ontop of it all, to think I was THIS CLOSE to letting my younger cousin drive me, someone who hasn't got even her driver's permit yet, just for driving practice. Jesus.
Imagine it. Had I died I mean. You all wouldn't have known about it most likely. It's surreal. I dread this thing subconciously, this very exact thing happening every waking second happening to EVERYBODY ELSE in my social connections. (Ack! Are you still alive? Respond if you are, blink your eyes at the computer screen! Good. See I just dreaded it, just there.) I guess I even dreaded it happening to me someday too though. Not so much dreaded as 'Yeah, knowing me that's probably LIKELY what would happen during my demise.' But not expecting to happen nearly so soon. Spooky.
I've had not really ever played with the idea of truly commiting suicide. I've felt depressed before as any sane being has, and had moments of weakness, but never have and never will ever cut myself or even consider it or any related form of self-harm. I've always wanted to be sure that I'll live to a ripe old age or at least die happy and contently fulfilled young, surrounded by friends and loved ones, or at least not go too painfully god forbid. Either way I am grateful for what G-d has done, or I has done, we has all done in whatever micro-cosmic manner to prevent all that foul business from happening to me, and more importantly to any other innocent people that day. Thank you. I don't care about the car. I don't care about anything really. It's a nuisance, but life is full of small nuisances, and you can learn to groan and make it ache worse, or take it like a bitch and groan with pleasure toward it, and harden yer skin during the calm breaks inbetween...Hmm. Perhaps I need to choose my metaphors more carefully. Okay, how about this one: It's not much fun going rollerskating if you never fall like a dumb fool on your ass, so long as you get back up again.
Blagh. Whatever. Gonna try and mess with the Zune now. (Thank you Marcus!) I am not familiar yet with it at all, but it certainly looks better than my old piece of shit. Anyone else in experience with zunes let me know, how do they compare with ipods?
Thankfully noone was hurt at all, I made it to work fairly on time, and thankfully, my dad came through for me at the last minute. I don't know what i'd do without his support. I'd be stuck completely broke, late for work just a block away, and be trapped standing there looking like a fool or worse a criminal, explaining to a cop that i don't know what happened to the front license plate, (it fell completely off, was smashed to pieces) and since I have never been in an accident before nor owned the car I had no real idea what the insurance papers or registration looked like then or where they were even kept in the glove compartment. i didn't even know before this what insurance I was on. Fancy looking up at a cop and saying "Well this thing HAD a license plate on it, I'm not sure when or how exactly it fell off, and I don't really know what insurance I'm on, or what happened to my registration papers..." and, then, IF I had figured it out, showed him a document which didn't have my name on it since the car doesn't belong to me. And ontop of it all, to think I was THIS CLOSE to letting my younger cousin drive me, someone who hasn't got even her driver's permit yet, just for driving practice. Jesus.
Imagine it. Had I died I mean. You all wouldn't have known about it most likely. It's surreal. I dread this thing subconciously, this very exact thing happening every waking second happening to EVERYBODY ELSE in my social connections. (Ack! Are you still alive? Respond if you are, blink your eyes at the computer screen! Good. See I just dreaded it, just there.) I guess I even dreaded it happening to me someday too though. Not so much dreaded as 'Yeah, knowing me that's probably LIKELY what would happen during my demise.' But not expecting to happen nearly so soon. Spooky.
I've had not really ever played with the idea of truly commiting suicide. I've felt depressed before as any sane being has, and had moments of weakness, but never have and never will ever cut myself or even consider it or any related form of self-harm. I've always wanted to be sure that I'll live to a ripe old age or at least die happy and contently fulfilled young, surrounded by friends and loved ones, or at least not go too painfully god forbid. Either way I am grateful for what G-d has done, or I has done, we has all done in whatever micro-cosmic manner to prevent all that foul business from happening to me, and more importantly to any other innocent people that day. Thank you. I don't care about the car. I don't care about anything really. It's a nuisance, but life is full of small nuisances, and you can learn to groan and make it ache worse, or take it like a bitch and groan with pleasure toward it, and harden yer skin during the calm breaks inbetween...Hmm. Perhaps I need to choose my metaphors more carefully. Okay, how about this one: It's not much fun going rollerskating if you never fall like a dumb fool on your ass, so long as you get back up again.
Blagh. Whatever. Gonna try and mess with the Zune now. (Thank you Marcus!) I am not familiar yet with it at all, but it certainly looks better than my old piece of shit. Anyone else in experience with zunes let me know, how do they compare with ipods?