(no subject)
Well holy shit, it has been forever and a day since my last entry. I really don't have an excuse so I won't waste anyone's time trying to come up with one.
I'll just move on to what's going on now. Work is weird. The last two weeks have been crazy busy. We finally realized that the internet wasn't routing the work it was supposed to to my e-mail, so a couple weeks worth of stuff was suddenly thrown at me. So I've been busting my ass for two weeks now and then we get this e-mail. I mean, my office manager warned me that some things would be coming off my plate, but this is ridiculous. Like, 90% of my duties are being given to the people in Florida. And after we get direct dial, I don't know what the hell I'm gonna be doing here. I'm not all too worried about being let go, I think they will need a receptionist no matter what. I'm more worried about being given that raise that I have coming to me. I will be so unbelievably pissed if they use this new development as a way of getting out of giving me a raise.
As for the personal life, there has been some new stuff. I met this boy named Brian at a dance club in Lake George. He's from San Diego and by some weird twist of fate he was gonna be in the city for the next two days. We met up for a night and had a very nice date. We have been e-mailing and talking ever since. It's been about three weeks since I met him. I was seriously thinking about going out to visit him in October. Now I'm not sure. Here are my problems as I see them:
A)We don't have that much in common. I knew this from our date-he doesn't like a lot of the things I like (except movies). We're kind of different people. He's very optimistic and sweet and laid back I'm kind of negative and neurotic.
B)He's tooooo nice. And he likes me too much. I know that might make most people groan, like, isn't that what you want? Well to be honest, no. I don't like gushing compliments and I don't want someone to tell me I'm "an awesome person" when they can't possibly have discovered how totally great I can be. You're supposed to earn those type of compliments. He just doesn't know me well enough to think these things. And I just don't trust anyone that feels this way after three weeks. I need sarcasm and bickering. God I'm so damn picky.
C)I have issues. Once a guy has started to go sour for me, there's almost no saving it. My brain works in funny ways. With all the e-mails and the calling, there's this little voice that constantly pesters me. It says, "He's too much work", "he doesn't get you", "He's not it, why are you wasting your time", "Don't you want your life back?". I know I have to work through this and try to see something through for once. Everyone's so excited for me and thinks it's so great that I found someone and they say I should just have fun and see where it goes. But I don't want to lead this boy on or anything. And since he likes me so much isn't it kind of wrong to keep his hopes up? I do think I need to stop giving up so easily, but I'm just not sure if he's someone I should try to make it work with. What if, in trying to conquer my issues, I extend a relationship that wasn't right in the first place?
I have absolutely nothing going on this weekend. It's so nice. I'll probably go see some movies. I have a back facial today. I'm looking forward to that. And I'll probably get some Indian food. Mmmm. I love the weekend. Next week I get to see Jake and we're going to have our garage sale. Very much looking forward to that.
Well that's pretty much the overview. I'll try and get back on track with LJ, but I won't promise anything.
I'll just move on to what's going on now. Work is weird. The last two weeks have been crazy busy. We finally realized that the internet wasn't routing the work it was supposed to to my e-mail, so a couple weeks worth of stuff was suddenly thrown at me. So I've been busting my ass for two weeks now and then we get this e-mail. I mean, my office manager warned me that some things would be coming off my plate, but this is ridiculous. Like, 90% of my duties are being given to the people in Florida. And after we get direct dial, I don't know what the hell I'm gonna be doing here. I'm not all too worried about being let go, I think they will need a receptionist no matter what. I'm more worried about being given that raise that I have coming to me. I will be so unbelievably pissed if they use this new development as a way of getting out of giving me a raise.
As for the personal life, there has been some new stuff. I met this boy named Brian at a dance club in Lake George. He's from San Diego and by some weird twist of fate he was gonna be in the city for the next two days. We met up for a night and had a very nice date. We have been e-mailing and talking ever since. It's been about three weeks since I met him. I was seriously thinking about going out to visit him in October. Now I'm not sure. Here are my problems as I see them:
A)We don't have that much in common. I knew this from our date-he doesn't like a lot of the things I like (except movies). We're kind of different people. He's very optimistic and sweet and laid back I'm kind of negative and neurotic.
B)He's tooooo nice. And he likes me too much. I know that might make most people groan, like, isn't that what you want? Well to be honest, no. I don't like gushing compliments and I don't want someone to tell me I'm "an awesome person" when they can't possibly have discovered how totally great I can be. You're supposed to earn those type of compliments. He just doesn't know me well enough to think these things. And I just don't trust anyone that feels this way after three weeks. I need sarcasm and bickering. God I'm so damn picky.
C)I have issues. Once a guy has started to go sour for me, there's almost no saving it. My brain works in funny ways. With all the e-mails and the calling, there's this little voice that constantly pesters me. It says, "He's too much work", "he doesn't get you", "He's not it, why are you wasting your time", "Don't you want your life back?". I know I have to work through this and try to see something through for once. Everyone's so excited for me and thinks it's so great that I found someone and they say I should just have fun and see where it goes. But I don't want to lead this boy on or anything. And since he likes me so much isn't it kind of wrong to keep his hopes up? I do think I need to stop giving up so easily, but I'm just not sure if he's someone I should try to make it work with. What if, in trying to conquer my issues, I extend a relationship that wasn't right in the first place?
I have absolutely nothing going on this weekend. It's so nice. I'll probably go see some movies. I have a back facial today. I'm looking forward to that. And I'll probably get some Indian food. Mmmm. I love the weekend. Next week I get to see Jake and we're going to have our garage sale. Very much looking forward to that.
Well that's pretty much the overview. I'll try and get back on track with LJ, but I won't promise anything.