if i was laughing at anyone it was at myself because what's true is that i do shy away from anything hugely liberal. i just don't want to go there. you're pretty perceptive and i don't think you actually misinterpreted anything at all; i think you were looking for something to jump on and created it.
you have never given any sign of caring whether you offend anyone and even say that you don't. what i think isn't going to change any more than what you think would by talking to someone like alyssa, and i'm not about to apologize for that. it gets us nowhere to get into politics with each other, you know that as well as i do. you'll just be reminded that in theory you hate me, so what motivation i could possibly have to participate i have no clue. if you're talking about something besides this issue when you say i never talk about anything real, i have no idea what it is you want me to be saying that i'm not. i don't read minds either and you don't ask me questions.
and i've never been dismissive. passive, yes, but the impression that i think i "know better" is totally ludacris and inaccurate. if i'm making you feel bad for who you are or like i somehow don't approve of you when i don't feel that way at all, i think the problem has more to do with you and what you think of your own beliefs than it does with anything i've done or said.
How could you say that to me? Why exactly would I make up that the person I regarded as my best friend thinks I'm incompetent, insignificant, dispensable piece of nothing? What exactly would I get out of that? Can YOU even answer that?
True, the comment isn't all that was wrong, but I certainly didn't make up how I felt about what you said.
This as almost nothing to do with politics and the fact that you think otherwise is quite insulting. This is about how you treat me like nothing I say, I do, and I am matters. I'm always wrong as far as you're concerned and you've never made any effort to see things any differently. What you've just said is a prefect example of what I'm talking about. If you can't see that, the problem is you, not me.
What does that even mean, "I think the problem has more to do with you and what you think of your own beliefs than it does with anything I’ve done or said." anyway? The fact that you can't or won't see how you continuously mistreat me has nothing to do with how I feel about myself or how I see the world. This is exactly what I'm talking about. Rather than try to see where I'm coming from, you undermine my ideology. How is that in any way not dismissing me? It's pretty much the definition.
Look, you consistently give me the impression that you don't care about me, my feelings, or if I'm around or not. I feel like you'll take anyone else's opinion, company, anything before you'll take mine. Not that I even expect you to care anymore, but that's what is going on. Considering that I've been putting up with it for the better part of a year now, I'm not the problem here. I just can't be around that anymore. I don't expect you to try to change, I've learned I can't expect anything positive from you anymore. I just think it's fair to let you know why exactly I'm hurt and upset.
can you give any example of me regarding you as imcompetent or insignificant?! i don't think that and i don't know how i've given you that impression. and how the heck have i mistreated you?! i am trying to see where you're coming from but i have no idea what i've done so wrong.
you started this on politics and haven't been specific about anything else, so if that's what i have to go on of course that's what i'd think.
we have opposite beliefs and different morals, so yes, i disagree with you on a lot of things and, newsflash, that's not going to change. i don't think any less of you for having those opinions, but you don't "make an effort to see things any differently"- why expect that from me? i've always been very aware of your views and it's been fine, and you're not just realizing what mine are, so why does it suddenly mean we can't be friends?
For someone who claims to be completely oblivious to frequently stepping on and undermining my feelings, you do it with astounding efficiency.
Examples? Seriously? Wow. Still think I'm making this whole thing up, are you? Fine, here's one: The coffee house era of your relationship with Chris. Incidents including but NOT limited to our trips to the coffee house. I must of told you a thousand times -weekly- that I didn't like him. That hanging out this the two of your together was really weird for me. What did you do? You invited him EVERYWHERE we went. If you invited me, you invited him too. Dismissing me and disregarding my feelings in the process. I could barely have a conversation with you when he was around, let alone talk to you about anything important or personal. I didn't understand why you couldn't hang out with both of us separately.
Here's another: When I decided that Jacqueline wasn't someone I wanted to be around, I didn't know I wouldn't be able to be around you either. I took a back seat to her. Much like I do to pretty much every one. You consistently choose other people over me. I’m not saying I don't like you having other friends. I'm saying that I don't like that as soon as you do, if I'm not their friend too, I'm pushed out of the picture. News flash: not all your friends are going to be friends with each other. It may prove inconvenient for you, but compromise and sacrifice is part of life. Welcome to human relationships.
Here's another: This string of discussion. You continuously undermine me and accuse me of making the whole thing up. Telling me that the fact that I don't like being treated like this is my problem and has nothing to do with you. Guess what, it does.
Enough with the whole moral thing. Seriously. When I asked you to make an effort to see things any differently, I meant I wanted you to consider the possibility that you do in fact treat me like I don't matter. I wasn't talking about your belief system.
Our difference of opinion isn't why we can't be friends anymore. The fact that you make me feel this way and when I try to talk to you about it you come back with responses like 'Well, you shouldn't' or 'That's your problem, that has nothing to do with me' rather than someone more helpful and appropriate like 'I'm sorry' is why we can't be friends. You telling me that my beliefs are why I feel bad about myself, not the fact that you treat me poorly is why we can't be friends.
I'm sick of this argument. I'm sick of repeating myself. I'm sick of having to defend my feelings. If you can't understand what I'm saying after all this, I guess we shouldn't be friends. I'm not going to go on being treated like this. I don't want to be around that anymore. I'm not going to be made to feel like I don't matter by my best friend.
you have never given any sign of caring whether you offend anyone and even say that you don't. what i think isn't going to change any more than what you think would by talking to someone like alyssa, and i'm not about to apologize for that. it gets us nowhere to get into politics with each other, you know that as well as i do. you'll just be reminded that in theory you hate me, so what motivation i could possibly have to participate i have no clue. if you're talking about something besides this issue when you say i never talk about anything real, i have no idea what it is you want me to be saying that i'm not. i don't read minds either and you don't ask me questions.
and i've never been dismissive. passive, yes, but the impression that i think i "know better" is totally ludacris and inaccurate. if i'm making you feel bad for who you are or like i somehow don't approve of you when i don't feel that way at all, i think the problem has more to do with you and what you think of your own beliefs than it does with anything i've done or said.
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True, the comment isn't all that was wrong, but I certainly didn't make up how I felt about what you said.
This as almost nothing to do with politics and the fact that you think otherwise is quite insulting. This is about how you treat me like nothing I say, I do, and I am matters. I'm always wrong as far as you're concerned and you've never made any effort to see things any differently. What you've just said is a prefect example of what I'm talking about. If you can't see that, the problem is you, not me.
What does that even mean, "I think the problem has more to do with you and what you think of your own beliefs than it does with anything I’ve done or said." anyway? The fact that you can't or won't see how you continuously mistreat me has nothing to do with how I feel about myself or how I see the world. This is exactly what I'm talking about. Rather than try to see where I'm coming from, you undermine my ideology. How is that in any way not dismissing me? It's pretty much the definition.
Look, you consistently give me the impression that you don't care about me, my feelings, or if I'm around or not. I feel like you'll take anyone else's opinion, company, anything before you'll take mine. Not that I even expect you to care anymore, but that's what is going on. Considering that I've been putting up with it for the better part of a year now, I'm not the problem here. I just can't be around that anymore. I don't expect you to try to change, I've learned I can't expect anything positive from you anymore. I just think it's fair to let you know why exactly I'm hurt and upset.
Reply
you started this on politics and haven't been specific about anything else, so if that's what i have to go on of course that's what i'd think.
we have opposite beliefs and different morals, so yes, i disagree with you on a lot of things and, newsflash, that's not going to change. i don't think any less of you for having those opinions, but you don't "make an effort to see things any differently"- why expect that from me? i've always been very aware of your views and it's been fine, and you're not just realizing what mine are, so why does it suddenly mean we can't be friends?
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Examples? Seriously? Wow. Still think I'm making this whole thing up, are you? Fine, here's one: The coffee house era of your relationship with Chris. Incidents including but NOT limited to our trips to the coffee house. I must of told you a thousand times -weekly- that I didn't like him. That hanging out this the two of your together was really weird for me. What did you do? You invited him EVERYWHERE we went. If you invited me, you invited him too. Dismissing me and disregarding my feelings in the process. I could barely have a conversation with you when he was around, let alone talk to you about anything important or personal. I didn't understand why you couldn't hang out with both of us separately.
Here's another: When I decided that Jacqueline wasn't someone I wanted to be around, I didn't know I wouldn't be able to be around you either. I took a back seat to her. Much like I do to pretty much every one. You consistently choose other people over me. I’m not saying I don't like you having other friends. I'm saying that I don't like that as soon as you do, if I'm not their friend too, I'm pushed out of the picture. News flash: not all your friends are going to be friends with each other. It may prove inconvenient for you, but compromise and sacrifice is part of life. Welcome to human relationships.
Here's another: This string of discussion. You continuously undermine me and accuse me of making the whole thing up. Telling me that the fact that I don't like being treated like this is my problem and has nothing to do with you. Guess what, it does.
Enough with the whole moral thing. Seriously. When I asked you to make an effort to see things any differently, I meant I wanted you to consider the possibility that you do in fact treat me like I don't matter. I wasn't talking about your belief system.
Our difference of opinion isn't why we can't be friends anymore. The fact that you make me feel this way and when I try to talk to you about it you come back with responses like 'Well, you shouldn't' or 'That's your problem, that has nothing to do with me' rather than someone more helpful and appropriate like 'I'm sorry' is why we can't be friends. You telling me that my beliefs are why I feel bad about myself, not the fact that you treat me poorly is why we can't be friends.
I'm sick of this argument. I'm sick of repeating myself. I'm sick of having to defend my feelings. If you can't understand what I'm saying after all this, I guess we shouldn't be friends. I'm not going to go on being treated like this. I don't want to be around that anymore. I'm not going to be made to feel like I don't matter by my best friend.
Do you get it NOW?
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